A story I didn't want to share.

[Marimba]

Mam,

I signed up for an account to reply to this thread, wrote all of the below, and realized your first post was in 2018. I do not know if you are still visit here. In any case, I hope the following is helpful to someone.

You and your loved one have my most sincere prayers and love.

I believe we must be ever so careful with any information that clearly defines reality. Kindly, I therefore suggest the use of your experience and discretion to freely excuse any of my opinions, here. I am only capable of communicating so effectively at this moment. I truly intend the following most lovingly (heart).

Firstly, based on what I've seen in this thread, I must say that there is an unquestionable outpouring of love for you, my friend. And I am sure if many others knew your story, and experienced exactly what you experienced in your life and in your head, they would not hesitate to bestow upon you, and embrace you with, the greatest of great loves. If it was safe and more easily possible to do so, I believe many of us would also not hesitate to give you a warm hug, sir, as well as place our hands upon your shoulders or bring you food. This also extends to you, mam, and many of us here, who have been affected in many ways by our various experiences.

I believe, we, human beings, especially those of us here, may be called pioneers. Being a human means being vulnerable. Also, this is quite a unique time to be alive -- and be vulnerable -- with all sorts of struggles -- in addition to bearing the weight of the "mysteries of the cosmos" on our shoulders. That said, please understand that I do not intend to discourage seeking in any way. I only with to help with healing and share some of my own truths and perspectives.

Beings who succinctly and gracefully communicate insightful complexities wield great influence/power. This cannot be understated; especially when it applies to us very curious, pioneering folks! Without one realizing, I believe it is possible, certainly with the way the Ra material is written, to affect a person in such a way where there begins obsessions with things like polarization %, the proper ratios to build ascension pyramids, the scheming of service-to-self entities, etc. To put it bluntly, I am not so sure the best way to experience love is to constantly walk around with an alien's abacus analyzing the perceived polarity of every deed. Is that so loving to yourself? Is it not important to maintain yourself to a functional state so that if you want, you can help others? I think that we human beings are generally loving and seek love naturally. I think most of us who read these words probably know the difference between stealing and charity, for example. I also think, we can sort of get in the habit of learning what sort of thoughts actually are true enough and also take us in the direction we want to go in life. I think most of us would prefer better jobs where we actually help people -- or not jobs at all -- but a more harmonious way of living that doesn't involve commodification, ignorance, and subjugation. I am not sure if we need a 4D+ being to tell us these things. By our very actions, if the whole polarization thing is true, we'd naturally polarize. We have such various experiences on Earth, even if there was a scoreboard, I can only imagine it would be highly inappropriate for me to compare my "Earth soul report" with one belonging to a single parent on the other side of the planet who struggled feeding her children under entirely different circumstances. If you think about it, knowledge of "polarization rules" throws a monkey wrench into things and breaks or nearly crosses the Ra Law of Confusion aka Ra Free Will, no? If given various opportunities, and the Ra stuff was correct, most of us would probably polarize very highly even if we must use the 51%+ alien/foreign abacus.

Also, from my own experience, it was damaging to me on many levels to keep reading "illusion" and "harvest" again and again. Do you think a loving, Eternal Creator would use these words? To me, "illusion" devalues the human experience. To me, "Harvest" is a commodification of human souls as though we are mere chaffs of wheat for the processing or consumption of the universe. Perhaps I am just overly sensitive, but Ra's word choices and semantics lasered crop circles in the light-seeking gardens of my fertile mind whose flowers may have been more safely nurtured in other ways. Indeed, I read most of the Law of One materials but eventually realized what had happened. Then I had to nurture my garden again, and I still do. Even as I write these words, the thoughts come: "Is this similar to 4D work? I still have my human body and I'm not drinking nectar from a community pool. Okay, no harvest yet." Please understand that I am not advocating censorship. It's just that I was not taught how to cope with...the...I suppose...the harshness of a purported keen non-human intellect, in school or any other part of life. And maybe many of you can say the same (heart symbol).

Perhaps I should avoid all speculation and meandering. I do not know. I apologize if I have troubled you. I am trying to learn and grow, too. But I have wondered if sometimes beings who evolve on other spheres, despite their abilities and intelligence, think they truly know or remember what it is to be human or human-like, but in actuality, they make errors. It is said the human experience, with various intermixed emotions and so forth, is more complex than we often consider. I also wonder if, as a "gestalt consciousness," or whatever form, beings like Ra iterate their own development to such a degree that it the outcome appears very mechanistic to us. Yes, I am saying that even though they have have surpassed or be of the alleged heart or wisdom density, that does not mean they are effective, healthy communicators when it comes to us. Perhaps through some cycles, Ra has lost some sort of awareness. However, I feel as though I have had many lessons and have grown much from the material (as one could say from any experience that is perceived as negative), so due gratitude given. May this being or complex find the help it so deserves (prayer).

When considering new information that may serve to define my reality, I found it most helpful to focus on a core truth or truths while seeing if the new material resonates. If you have no core truths, then it is easy to be swept up in the air by a keen authority. And of course, please watch the energy in your being, your body, to see how you react. Sometimes, it takes me a little while to feel out information -- it's not always an immediate mental process or reaction. I found this to be true because I have read all sorts of channeled material. One channeler, Tom Kenyon, also happens to be an accredited mental health professional. He often says to keep an imaginary box nearby to discard anything that doesn't jive with you. Yes, even though the info is coming from him, he says to junk it because it may not be true or doesn't fit with you.

There is another thing that I have found to be helpful, but easier said than done in my case. That is when coming across new information, it is easy for me to "test" the information by allowing myself to be 100% absorbed into it. This has its benefits and its dangers. When test/think/feel the information out this way, my body, mind, and energy do not know the difference between truth and what may be what some person concocted to post online. Even if I later learn the information is rubbish, I still had the stank and weight of this "energy rubbish" in tow. So, if I start to get an agitated feeling in my gut (stress response) to a certain level, I know it's time to lay off the "what ifs" about reality/Earth/the cosmos. That's a stress response. So, I am careful that I don't read too many, "What ifs" because they are very taxing for me. Everyone is different. Maybe this is not the case for you, but I don't like to stack too much on my plate when people talk about things of significant Earth/cosmic proportions because I take it to heart, perhaps too easily (for now? But this blog said 5D would be like this...oh wait, there I go again smiley).

So, it seems truth is found in the bad and good. We should probably avoid overdosing on the bad and good. And if we so choose, check in with ourselves now and then to see if we are being true and loving to ourselves and others (and suggested in no particular order smiley). I think patience with ourselves and others is another way to express love.

Also, regardless of what may happen in the future, I think we should respect human experience, culture, and knowledge, gathered by humans and preserved in various teachings, art, writings, etc. over many thousands of years. Our history, our stories, and our spiritual are significant and should not be underestimated. Lastly, on a slightly different but related note, if anything were to happen with the so-called disclosure (which I see as another potential for all sorts of non-heartfelt shenanigans and supplantation), we should fully embrace our Heritage and Divinity.

Love and blessings to you all.

[flofrog]

Marimba,
Welcome here,
What you write seems quite insightful to me too. I think obsession about polarisation is time lost. This incarnated life is about much more. I also have a feeling that when Ra speaks of illusion, he speaks of the apparent theater that takes place everyday in our ongoings. Under this illusion lies our soul and her quest.

Little by little our actions may be looked at more closely from our Self, and we can clarify slowly at we aim. We come to peace with how silly we can be. I have done that a lot…lol But it doesn’t prevent us from living sudden blissful experiences with entities of second and third density. In the end it’s quite an extraordinary thing to be permitted to incarnate on this quite amazing planet, despite all the strife.

[InfiniteOneness]

Hello, I do not like to post on this forum, as the exchange of energies can often be volatile, but I do have some things to offer, emphasis on the offer, if it doesn’t resonate with you, pop it in the bin.

The first thing I’d like to discuss is our beloved cat friends, what use would it be to tell them of the human experience? How would a cat respond to being told not to be a cat? It would be futile, and damaging to it’s perfect, furry little nature. Likewise, this material is meant for those who are seeking to understand the Law of One, that is, there is no polarity, no separateness, there is only identity.

From my seeking, which is always ongoing, I have had the luxury of realising this truth many times. My indigo began to pulse at a young age, followed by health issues. Due to the imbalance in the lower chakras, it is dangerous to do work here, as Ra said, it is inviting great imbalance. However, the nature of consciousness is to seek it’s source, and so I suppose I cheekily explore things beyond this realm of understanding. Thankfully, I am able to eventually find some form of balance.

To put it simply, the creator is love, in my eyes. This love cannot be explored without a concept of duality, there are two paths to explore this concept, one being, love for the self as a separate self, or love for others as a unified other. Our choice is in which path we wish to explore, for those seeking to realise the Law of One, our task is to understand love and it’s distortions consciously, to be able to see all as love. This doesn’t mean deny doubt, or control the mind, although that is acceptable if one wishes to do so, it means we seek to understand the love within distortions. Ra have told me and it may have been said in the Law of One material, that we cannot unravel a distortion, but it can be illumined.

The way I like to think of it, is there are two minds and two hearts, one mind sees itself as separate, and so it’s love is often a form of self preservation, control of the environment and those around one among other things, the theme here is power. There is great humour to be found here, for one takes four fingers off of their right hand, puts them on the left and things they’re more powerful than their own hand, due to their denial of the other hand as the self. It is the love and light of the one, as if one is separate. The other mind and heart recognise the other as the self and self as the other, and so it is the creators love for itself without separation. The hallmark of STS is control, the hallmark of STO is acceptance, yet control is acceptance of something, the creator has good humour.

The reason polarity is an illusion is because all is one.
3rd density explores this from service to self / service to others.
4th density is the exploration of this as service to others / service to all.
5th density is the exploiration of this as service to all / service to the creator.
6th is the realisation that all is the same creator, and to serve one part of it is to serve it all, for it cannot be many. It balances the compassion (service to others) with the wisdom (service to all) gained in the prior two densities.
7th density is where our awareness becomes one with the creators, and we lose the personal awareness. I like to think of this as the scene in the matrix with all the TVs, it is like looking through all points of awareness at once with the knowing this is the self, this is all the creator. Awareness is going in every direction infinitely.

Personally, I’m not a fan of polarity and duality, for to say I am good because this is bad is to say this is bad because I am good, it is useful to a point, but eventually it must be seen that all is the one, trying to serve the one from various points of identity. All is the creator, and so all service is to the creator, whether one accepts this or not is their freewill choice. It changes the perception of reality, but not the reality itself. This is the illusion, so to speak.

Freewill, also known as desire, is the ability to know, not know, experience or not experience the self as the creator.

Ra said, the root cause of blockage is the inability to see the creator, or to phrase it differently, the lack of love.

My wisdom would say, your friend has created this situation for his learning and deserves the utmost of respect for such a challenging lesson. To force him to make a choice in one way or another is to remove his right to be the creator of his own experience, we may say that this hurts, that we do not enjoy seeing him like this, but can we say that whilst accepting whatever choice he is to make?

I too have tried suicide many times, suicide will work if there is no conscious or subconscious desire to live for something, to achieve something or to serve in some way. If he has failed, he has yet to realise the reasons he wishes to survive. The creation will always intervene otherwise, it takes quite a great deal of purity to be able to kill oneself. I am not encouraging or discouraging either way, his higher self will not force him to experience something that has no potential to bear fruit, and so I trust that on some level he is learning.

Jeshua once spoke in a channeling to a mother who’s daughter was in a coma, trying to explain to her that she doesn’t understand the work being done, even if she cannot see it with her eyes. I urge you to offer him what he needs and requests, not what you consider best for him. I will remind you that even the most erroneous of self serving entities believe they’re the good guys, and that they’re doing the best thing and that others cannot understand. No entity thinks themselves of bad, all returns to them, they do not need more punishment from us when they have their own fruit to reap from their sowing.

We need not accept harm to ourselves, for we too are the creator, but we need not wish it to others, for that will return to us. We create our reality, but if we knew the reality we were creating, we wouldn’t dare create it, hence the veil, it allows for a true freewill exploration.

Things might seem dark, and they likely are, I see many of our brothers and sisters on this forum from both sides of the polarity pole, but it is a pole, joined together, two degrees of the same thing from the perspective of unity. The choice of service is a choice of efficiency in service.

For instance, if I am a cancer cell, I deny myself as my body, and take all the resources for myself. Little do I know I am killing myself to serve myself, this is the path of self service. Parasites in nature are short lived, survival of the fittest is more a matter of symbiosis than dominance. The other choice is to see the body as one, how can one take from one hand to give to another and gain anything? They have taken from themselves. Polarity ceases to be at sixth density, we are at the beginning of fourth and the end of third, trying to understand such things without acknowledging the law of responsibility is to invite great great imbalance. Enjoy the ignorance, the veil, the trees and the water, the music and the company. What a joy to know the self as a separate being, how could one receive beautiful surprises otherwise?

I despair often, and am being greeted much, those of us who are bright, so to speak, are magnets for those who wish to use that light or put it out, but even this is ourselves trying to serve ourself in a less efficient manner. Is it worthy of exploration? Sure thing! Without putting one’s hand in the fire, they will not learn the folly of such things.

We never actually enter the illusion, that’s the illusion, for how could the unchanging actually change? There are ways to realise and experience this, but those fruits come from our own seeking, we cannot force others to accept the reality we have been allowed to create.

There are eight billion people, and eight billion different realities all exchanging information with one another. All of them are distortions of the same thing; love and light of the one, to the one. In true selfishness, one cannot hurt the self, for to do so would not be very selfish. Don’t allow polarity to be a roadblock, use it until it is needed, and then drop it, if it is causing you strain.

Love and light to all of you, for you are me and I am you, we are one, in unity, forever free.

WE ARE ONE! <3

[InfiniteOneness]

A side note, it is not the job of the moderators to control and dictate what is acceptable or not, for is this not control? Are those of you seeking to serve others wishing to do so by infringing on the right of freewill? If you cannot discern what is good for you, and what is no use, I recommend you leave not just this forum, but all forms of energy exchange until you can trust the intuition/intelligence that was a gift of the creator to the creator. It is not up to one of us to control another, unless we are consciously seeking to serve the self. I understand, especially in America, that it has become the norm to moderate and control that which one finds unacceptable, but it is still control, it is still a silencing. Those of us who are a little older in soul years can shine a clear light, but it is up the boat to follow the lighthouse, it may smash into the rocks if it chooses to do so.

As our sister sang so beautifully, we want our freedoms without responsibilities.

Is this not the trick of the self serving? To convince you that you’re too stupid to choose for yourself? That sort of behaviour and willingness not to choose led to those like Hitler taking control, it is better to freeze and starve having tried your way, than to allow murder and rape because you’re following the way of another, in my very personal opinion.

Those who are parents know the pains of wisdom, of watching their children get their hearts broke, of making mistakes, of allowing them to choose their own path, but the alternative is to keep them trapped like Repunzal, however you spell that.

On a side note, let down your hair! We’re all going to die, might as well have some fun before then. It will all make sense eventually, that I can promise.