Lotsa Questions

[Jade]

Hey Jade, long time no see or talk.  It's nice to see you're still diligent in helping others.  I found your answers useful, though my own distortions had me a bit upset at areas.  I'm going to refrain from being upset, as in the past all that has done is prove to further block me.  Instead I want to re-ask some questions to get even more thoughtful answers.

Question 2 concerning the various directions of polarity.  For a while I saw polarity as threefold, left/middle/right, with the middle path being one more of balancing Wisdom and Love to most efficiently polarize, versus right being of unconditional love and left being of pure selfishness.
But in that way I thought maybe I was missing more and tried to imagine what other directions there might be.
I did this because in my mind personally, I struggle so greatly with separating left and right polarity from one another that I can't effectively tell what's what anymore.  A CEO of a major company trying to rob people of their rights could be a positive polarity act for all I know in some strange way I cannot see.  Similarly a person aiding someone who is homeless may be negative polarity, because the person did so out of a want to feel better about themselves rather than because they genuinely cared for that other person.

With these two examples I'm left beyond baffled and dumbfounded, I'm totally and completely lost in this system.  It doesn't...Make sense to me.  I don't get it at all and it's very upsetting at times for me when I want to do the 'right' thing and all that ends up happening is everything going wrong.  I recently quit a fast food job because I felt it was the right thing to do, but I didn't have it in my heart to go through the proper authorities to ensure for the safety of all other customers they too won't get sick from eating there.
Now that it's over and done with the experience has left me unable to make sense of whether or not I did do the right thing at all.  In fact, I'm pretty sure whenever I try to do the right thing, I end up doing the wrong thing, typically, with exceptions.

And all I can ever come to in my belief system is ultimately I do not understand what is right or wrong, or perhaps I understand it so well that I'm unaware of understanding it well due to the apparent opinion that there is no wrong or right, and thus nothing to be considering.  Making all of these concerns once again the catalyst of my mental illnesses...  Ugh, on the verge of tears cause it's so upsetting to me.  I want to do the right things and I don't know how.

Here's the deal. Ra says between unconditional love and selfishness lies the sinkhole of indifference. However, unconditional love's requirements are only 51%, which is difficult to achieve but obviously is barely over the middle of the spectrum. It doesn't require you to be 100% unconditionally loving all the time.

Honestly, the thing that helped me elucidate my own choices/polarity more clearly was my study of the Transformation of the Mind - have you read the courting the maiden thread? Ra says polarity has to with how we perceive and use the resources of the deep mind and resources of other selves. If you are viewing resources as just that, resources to be used on a whim the fulfill your pleasure, this is a negative transformation of the mind. If you are looking at others and treating their resources as extremely valuable, as something to be protected and cherished, this is the positive transformation. I'm just trying to elucidate this in other ways other than the dichotomy of "courting the maiden" and "plundering the prostitute" which works well for me, but I understand it doesn't for everyone.

I don't know the specifics of what happened with your job, but let's take a few examples of how polarity would be distilled from this experience, in my opinion:
You left because the job didn't resonate with your true being - slight positive increase
You left because you didn't want to try to get along with your coworkers - slight negative
You didn't tell the health department because you didn't want to cause problems for your coworkers - slight positive
You didn't call the health department because you were too lazy - slight negative

So you can see how the same actions can have different intentions/polarity? And it gets much more subtle and nuanced than that. To me, it's about using our past experiences where we feel we "failed" and not beating ourselves up over it, but learning and moving forward and trying to do better next time.

I know polarity IS confusing and being HFA must make it harder to determine other people's intentions. I find watching TV, movies, etc can be very helpful - these stories all pull from the same archetypical reaches of the deep mind. For instance, after I read your post last night, I watched TNG: Descent (Part II) where (major spoilers if you don't know) Lore comes back and takes control of the Borg, after the Enterprise gave them free will (in I, Borg). Lore takes their confusion and becomes their "savior". There's specifically a scene where he is comforting a Borg who has decided to "unlink" (they can still read each other's minds but can choose whether or not to allow others to read their mind), and Lore is obviously sweet, gentle, and charismatic, but he is doing it to manipulate the Borg into being more complacent. Lore is pretty much the epitome of a baddie archetype in this episode, but I think it was a great example of how someone can have a "noble purpose", or "noble character" but use these things for ugly gain.

The thing that makes polarity so confusing is that what "looks good" is often self serving and what "looks bad" is often the best for the whole. Really, one of the big things to let go of if you want to polarize positive is the way people perceive you. The negative polarity tries to subvert the free will of everyone to make them only look upon them fondly. The positive polarity often looks naive, dirty, and foolish. Again, these are the imps on the significator.

One thing that has freed me greatly is a lesson of Q'uo. Q'uo says that if you can truly act from love, even if it seems like you failed, that you haven't failed at all. Let's take an example. Say my coworker was making a big mistake at work. I hate confrontation, so correcting someone is out of my wheelhouse. So I take some deep breaths and try to center myself in love, and offer a gentle correction to the coworker.

Now, the coworker has any myriad of responses available to them. They could get mad at me for confronting them. They could be embarrassed and stop looking me in the eye for a while. They could begrudgingly "bend to my will" and give in to what I want out of obligation. They could stomp their feet, get angry, and tell me "no!". Or, they could be genuinely grateful that I taught them something new. Regardless, their follow up action is out of my hands - it's how I initially instigated the interaction that matters on my end. I did it with love, which means the "success" of the action, whether immediate or something that affects them down the line, is more sure. If another person had corrected the same person, but was snarkier/less loving, the "success" of the action is much more in doubt. And by the word "success", I mean "seeding of love into that event". Maybe my love was just a single love straw that is building to break the back of the unloving camel in that person's life. Either way, if I know with surety that I did it with love, and I can choose to feel good and successful with my actions, even if the outcome seems to be anger or hatred.

Jade, if you will just cope with me here...Imagine a five pointed star.  On it's points at the farthest left and right are the polarities we talk about as core parts of the spectrum.  Then at the highest point is what I called the middle polarity.  Then we have the two lowest points that are in ways their own forms of polarity that I don't even know how to make an example to better describe...Is this a plausible view of polarity in your mind?  Or is it better to just apply AA's KISS acronym, and to just Keep It Simple Silly and leave it as Left/Right, even though that understanding has been greatly confusing for me?

Like I said, Ra said between the two ends of the spectrum lies the sinkhole of indifference. But I think you are focusing too much on the extreme purity of intent of the STO path. This isn't necessary - it's a gradual thing to increase one's purity of intent. It's not all or nothing right off the bat. Polarity and purity build upon themselves.

Question 4: This answer was greatly helpful, especially regards a recent family matter that occurred over the holidays...
I want to go a bit further with this question.
These restraints of otherselves is one type of catalyst I've experienced that I'm actually coming to accept and handle better more and more often.  On the flip side of this, I've lately found the biggest restraint upon myself is my own mind.  I do meditate fairly often, but it doesn't stop the thoughts that I have, or the feelings I get even after I do the balancing techniques, and sit with the emotions I felt across the day at the end of the day.
I guess I should mention I'm HFA, high functioning autistic, with paranoia and anxiety disorders.  I can hardly pick up a phone to make a phone call, or be outside for longer than a few hours before I become emotional and want to retreat to the comfort of my home.

Do you have any helpful things to add regarding freeing myself more and more from the constraints of my own self?

I wasn't diagnosed HFA until very recently, but looking back all the way to my childhood it pretty much explained why I was always different and alone, and why my childhood best friend is someone with Aspergers.  I can't figure out if the worsening of these conditions in my early twenties forcing me to seek medical help was a result of preincarnational catalyst activating due to my failure at something, or if it's just a naturally occurring catalyst for someone who with fear sought to eliminate by ignoring mostly all catalyst to attempt to focus more on themselves to later on better meet catalyst.  I'm muddying up my question...I'm sorry, I'll move on.

The end of the day balancing excersise (sitting with your feelings at the end of the day) is a GOOD one, if you really want to work harder, I would suggest starting the day with a meditation too, and setting a simple set of intentions, such as: I want to work on an orange ray blockage today, or something along those lines.

I imagine all of this must be harder being HFA. I'm fascinated with Austism and I personally believe it's a reaction to the thinning of the veil that entities are having - especially those who are dual bodies. Our world is designed to break through the thick veil of third density, and those same events are shocking and traumatizing to those who are functioning higher. Do you believe you might be a dual-activated body? (beings who are early fourth density who have incarnated at harvest for extra extra catalyst)

I think ignoring catalyst is the wrong thing to do no matter what, and if you think that your attempts to do this were so successful that you injured yourself mentally, well, I'm not going to say that's impossible. But you should at least attempt to give attention to your catalyst (sounds like you do now with your night meditations).

As far as how to free yourself more from the constraints of other selves... well. That's not easy to quantify in actions. I can tell you that my family literally despises me, so it's not an easy journey. People will always resist you breaking out of the programming of society, especially those who benefit the most from you being programmed. I guess the other things I would recommend might be obvious: Stop watching TV, stop reading news stories (these are ALL propaganda to make you think/feel a certain way). don't spend too much time on social media. Obviously I still watch TV shows (as do most people!) but try not to watch -TV-, which is 20% (minimum) advertising anyway. These things have definitely helped me.

Question 5:  Your answer here greatly upset me, to the point of tears, only because I literally cannot make my mind be as I want it to be by apparently my very own preincarnational design for this life.  This results in literally an endless swathe of incongruity.  I have done things so kind I had people asking me what it was that made me able to be so loving, and all I could think was, 'I didn't do anything at all, I don't even want to deal with any of this, I hate this'; but my feelings say 'it's because I love you the way I want to be loved and I feel everyone deserves that' and the result is I have no idea if those thoughts that I cannot stop or control are effectively nullifying every single thing I do.  Even catching the thoughts and changing them on the spot, in my understanding, is an infringement against the right of those thoughts to come forth and be had and to simply be.

Does that mean, because of the ways I've designed my own mind, I've set myself up on, what I want to call, a 'Very Hard' difficulty in life?

I'm sorry that I made you upset. I think we are all basically on "hard mode" here on earth, to be honest. Having mental difficulties definitely increases that difficulty.

I don't think it's as easy for a thought to nullify an action as it is for an action to nullify a thought, by the way. But, Ra says that increasing our polarity can help protect us from entities who "may not want to help", entities who seed negative thought patterns into us to decrease our polarity. It's a tug of war game, really.

Question 7: I should probably have given some additional information to properly render my focus.  I meant to ask with regards to kundalini more so than anything, in a way similar to the rising serpent mimicking a thermometer rising slowly, is this congruent with the visualization of polarity?
I ask this because the green ray is essentially half way through the system while the indigo ray is at the extreme far end of the entities instreaming energies (their internal placement within their internal world).  Does this mean polarity can be measured like a thermometer similar to the rising and falling of kundalini?

I had a very hard time thinking of how to word this question, I will do so now by simply re-asking it.

7. Is polarity measured like a thermometer that slowly lowers and raises in small or large increments in ways similar to how kundalini's rising serpent might rise and lower as one polarizes more and more towards one end of the polarity spectrum?  I'm trying to ask if polarity's goals and the goals of raising the kundalini are the same concepts described from two different perspectives or angles?  One from the angle of the metaphysics of polarity, and another from the angle of the entity's energetic system?  Or if they are actually still different concepts.

I ask this because if I could remove the distortions of anxiety and fear at the supposed difficulty I see myself having in attaining 51% sto polarity for the ease I see myself having at handling my chakras to raise kundalini up to green ray, it'd help ease my mind a lot.

I don't think they are exactly congruent, but I understand now more what you mean. It is true that Ra says that the locus of where our kundalini meets the incoming energy into our violet ray is a good thermometer of our being. I believe if you can reside in the heart, and recognize when you are opening/closing it, that that is the most important part of polarity.

The most important concept to grasp about the energy field is that the lower or negative pole will draw the universal energy into itself from the cosmos. Therefrom it will move upward to be met and reacted to by the positive spiraling energy moving downward from within. The measure of an entity’s level of ray activity is the locus wherein the south pole outer energy has been met by the inner spiraling positive energy.

As an entity grows more polarized this locus will move upwards. This phenomenon has been called by your peoples the kundalini. However, it may better be thought of as the meeting place of cosmic and inner, shall we say, vibratory understanding. To attempt to raise the locus of this meeting without realizing the metaphysical principles of magnetism upon which this depends is to invite great imbalance.

7.1. In fact, of that, is harvest automatically 'unlocked' or achieved in the future or at the end of this incarnation if the person at any point in their life raised kundalini to green ray, or does it need to be risen to green ray at the time of the termination of this incarnation for harvest to be achieved?

I'm not sure exactly how to answer this one. I believe it's cumulative, but I also believe it can happen in a moment at the end of someone's life. I don't think you can open your heart once and be harvestable, though.

Question 8: May I ask why 6D wanderers have such vastly different plans in life in attempts to reach such extreme polarities, often times at the cost of their health and life, compared to 5D or 4D wanderers?  I feel like for such a thing to occur, it'd be seen as selfish by their human identity which suffers alongside their consciousness for goals that the human identity will never know during it's life.  This opinion is based on Ra's remark of how the yellow ray identity ceases in death.  Is it ethical for a 6D being to reincarnate into a human identity to use for it's own spiritual gain at it's physical identity's sometimes total loss of if not just joy, then life itself?  I'm looking at Carla as an example of this.  While her human identity seemed able to cope with what her consciousness had in plan for her body, if I had been her I wouldn't have been able to cope at all with the thoughts that I were using myself in such extreme ways for goals I would never be able to see with my human eyes during my human life.
Can you provide your thoughts on these concerns of mine?

Where does Ra says that the yellow ray identity ceases at death?

I can offer some thoughts but I cannot say I have the breadth of perception that a 6th density entity does when they choose to incarnate on this planet. I do know that Ra says that they are nearing harvest and are doing subtle balancing by incarnating as Wanderers. This allows them to be closer and closer to reunification with the all, which I assume is good for the whole whenever any entity achieves such. I think by the time we are mid sixth density, we feel so safely within the arms of the Creator that incarnating and feeling away from the arms of the Creator seems to be the only option for new experiences. We limit our awareness so that we can surprise ourselves, really. I do try to frame it as a game in a positive light as much as possible.

Question 10: I must apologize as I incorrectly typed out this question.  I am also dyslexic  
I meant to say Selfishly Selfless and Selflessly Selfish.  I typed Selfishly Selfish, that was a mistake.

Ah, I was wondering why it made little sense! It makes more sense now. I think what you are getting at is how the STO path includes service to self, because it is the most balanced path. Fourth density is the density of martyrdom, but as an STO invokes wisdom, it learns to protect itself from those who do it harm. This is where the balancing gets extra tricky - because you certainly don't want to justify shutting down the heart as a means of protecting the self from another self - ultimately, acceptance and compassion is the end goal. But for instance, "freeing oneself from the constraints of otherselves" can be an extremely selfish thing - especially when you have friends and family who are left behind in the wake. But ultimately we do this so that we can see more the the heart of the being of ourselves and of others.

The question was meant to help me untangle in my mind the single-pointed nature of polarity's core, that being both left and right emerge from the same place and reconcile back into the same place.  This allows for seemingly paradoxical occurrences.  Such as, being selfish can seem selfless, and being selfless can seem selfish.  

Does it all ultimately boil down to the genuine intent rather than all the thoughts, words, and actions made up to that point?  Does giving to the homeless just to make myself feel better boil down to sts polarity?  Does not giving a homeless man 20 dollars cause you know he'll spend it on booze rather than food and water boil down to sto because you didn't want to help another further destroy their self?

This question is me attempting to define the gray areas.
OR, random sudden thought, does being selfish and selfless in the same sequence cause both polarization of sts and sto energies?  Or do they share the same 'thermometer' and thus negate each other if both were to 'rise' (think of adding a negative number to a positive value, your addition is actually subtraction).

It is a paradox. Here, let's look at the homeless man as a distiller of polarity:
Giving money to the homeless to feel like a good person/brag about it - slight negative polarization
Refraining from giving to a homeless person because of judgement on where he'll spend his money - strong negative polarization
Giving money to the homeless because they are asking for help in a way that is easy for you to offer - slight positive polarization
Giving money to the homeless because you know it's the right thing, in spite of your feelings that they might spend it on booze - pretty strong positive polarization

There are lots of homeless where I live, so this is catalyst I've tried to process thoroughly. My ideal place I try to be at is: If I see a person with a sign asking for help, and I have a few spare singles, I will give that person the money. Now, I'm not perfect - there are lots of panhandlers and sometimes I do judge on "how homeless" someone is - there are the obvious homeless, and then of course there are panhandlers who supplement whatever other income they have. But I try to abide by the rule that, if someone in my frame of perception is asking for help and I notice, and I can help without much too much expenditure on my part, I should help.

My justification for giving the homeless "booze money" (and, full disclosure, I've given panhandlers marijuana in various forms several times) is that no matter what, they're gonna buy booze. Maybe my $3 will be enough to at least push them over their "booze money" threshhold into the surplus, "food money" budget. You cannot survive on liquor alone, humans have to eat, so I justify that somewhere, some of the money they receive goes to food. Obviously. And maybe the warm gesture will affect them in other, intangible ways, too.  

And let's not judge the boozers so harshly, yeah? Alcohol keeps you warm, reduces pain - most of the homeless have mental illness of some sort, and this is their way of self-medicating. However, it's also why I enjoy giving them marijuana when I can - it's a more legitimate way to self medicate, and a few tokes will often keep someone away from the bottle for a while. But I just think of how cold these people must get, and what physical ailments they likely have that make drinking/medicating a necessity to function.

11.  I question the 'most vivid' portion, as I've had dreams that seemed more real and vivid than waking life itself.  Though I think I understand it within the context of 'The most vivid catalyst available to 3D entities'.
I don't know...So many people have compared Earth to the concept of Hell.  I can see it myself personally, and it hurts to see such things being done by creator to creator, I fret at the possibility that I could be one of those creations being cast into the hellish parts of life on Earth.  More so than that, a large part of my conscious mind repeatedly echos that it would rather cease to exist than deal with all of the...more traumatic catalyst available on Earth, an ode to my desire to suicide rather than suffer to such extremes.
The entire concept of catalyst's operations as described by Ra did essentially sum up to Suffering to Learn Lessons to me, which at first was acceptable in examples like you touch a hot stove and learn through pain not to do so again for your own safety.  Or experiencing sadness at the loss of a good friend, so as to learn through the suffering of the catalyst of sadness to try harder to keep your friends.
But past a point, I lose the ability to accept it.  Such as in areas like someone being imprisoned and raped or tortured, what purpose does such vehement suffering and pain have to serve or teach that isn't lost in the distortions spawned by the traumatic experience?  How does the one performing the catalyst upon you, the raped and tortured, learn from teaching you greater myriads of pain when all they garnish from the experience is the pleasure of your suffering?  Sure, it serves some portion of the infinite creator, but were these lessons truly consensual or abrogations of your consent to be interacted with in certain ways?  Is this way of use of the human creation ethical?
If humanity's collective identity one day became aware of these ways and mechanics and functions and existence of Catalyst, would it collectively agree with these mechanisms as ethical once they saw the results of these constructs, or would their be rebellion against this way of reality's functioning?

Dreaming as we know it is a function of third density - as well as the vividness of the dreams, IMO. Without the veil, with no conflict, not even dreams would be as vivid as they are.

I understand your resonance with earth being a Hell planet. I get that totally - here's one of my favorite songs. I think it's another one of our paradoxes - the Edenic Hell of our planet.

I guess sometimes it requires faith - faith that, from a larger perspective, the suffering does have a purpose. That a person may have distortions the rest of their life because of trauma, but that maybe this is just one part of the story, one lifetime in a series of lifetimes where we are setting up dominoes for ourselves to knock down.

You also have to remember that before the Creator conceived of the veil, that suffering didn't exist at all. Now, infinity is more, because of the veil, because of suffering. Suffering is a "improvement" on Creation and infinity, if you can think of it that way. Again, I sincerely don't believe we would be so eager to Wander if our life stories would lack any conflict or drama.

Question 12:  That statement about the absence of free will's existence before the veil seems contradictory due to the offered view that before there was even space or time to form a veil in, there was the First Primal Distortion of the Law of One known as The Law of Confusion/Free Will.
I don't see Free Will as inherently selfish, I do however view the way the creation uses 3D creations, from the participation in genocide to the purposeful design of extreme ranges of pain and suffering to planetary scale dissolution and destruction, as being viewable as selfish uses of creation disregarding creation's experiences to the results, seeing any and all as favorable, when possibly to the many that experienced it directly, found it to be wholly unfavorable despite knowing something was still gained for the one infinite.

I think a philosophical question can be garnished from this design of the veil and 3D acquiring experiences for the one infinite; does an entity remain itself once it permanently acquires amnesia, or does it hence become a new entity?  Is the amnesiac entity subject to all the choices and consequences of a life it has no memory of ever being a part of?  Is it ethical to subject that entity that is displaced in an entirely new setting with a new personality and new thoughts to consequences it garnished in a wholly different space, time, and identity?

I guess I just wonder if the one infinite creator has a sense similar to a human, to not rip off one of it's limbs just for the experience of doing so.  I can't say with certainty if it does or doesn't if I'm to believe the history of our solar system given in the Ra Material.  Were I the logos, after one of my planetary bodies was destroyed, I'd put a temporary halt to the experiment just to make sure everything is okay and to see if the little parts of me effected in that occurrence are okay and willing to continue or not, rather than to just be loving to the outcome and continue on without much more thought given to those who suffered through it.

...Perhaps I am overly distorted with love, I care so much about the suffering of others that I question the worth of that suffering.  I question if we could not find a better way to go about this experiment without causing so much harm that entire civilizations are bombing themselves out of physical existence.  It just seems...Like something is off for that to be happening, if you can accept that as my way of seeing things.

Ra said that before the veil was conceptualized, Logoi believed they were offering Free Will to their sub-logoi.

To answer your philosophical question - well, I can think of an analogy. Look at an infant. Eventually it grows into a toddler, a child, a teen, an adult. This is the same person, but the experiences (and appearances!) of the adult are much greater than that of the infant. In that vein, there is a lot of programming for humans that happens in that interim between child and adult, that skews our morality and our ability to empathize with suffering.

I think your empathy is commendable and a huge thing - but, as you can see, you can martyr yourself with empathy. The Logos again, offering free will to the entities that have blown up their planet, has choices to make but mostly the Logos wants to honor the free will of its inhabitants. It's not as if these entities are without help - within the Logos, we have the Brothers and Sisters of Sorrow who reach out to those who have been traumatized be their own actions. The veil, while incarnated, just makes these efforts almost completely ignored.

To use another Star Trek analogy, think of how important the Prime Directive is. There are times when the crew can save others from destruction, but can't, because they are bound by the Prime Directive. This forces them to artfully create ways to break the Prime Directive without altering the awareness of those who haven't evolved yet to the level of the Federation. But, the greatest sin is forcing awareness upon others before they have come upon it themselves - it's spoiling the game. It's forcing people to play poker with the hands shown.

Question 13: I thought as much, but the question spawned from my having a thought about how balancing the indigo ray might affect the physical state of the pineal gland, which lead to what I hope isn't too big of a leap, to the thought that crystallization might affect the physical, and so I was wondering if the nervous system that connects the cardiovascular systems of the heart and the digestive systems of the gut to the mental systems of the brain can also be affected in similar ways as the pineal gland.
Like, does the nervous system surrounding the heart change as the green-ray is crystallized?
Does the digestive system and it's nervous system and operations change to reflect crystallization of the lower triad chakras?
Do the genitalia function more efficiently or effectively (in regards to sexual energy transfers, or maybe even just sex in general) if the red ray is crystallized?  I know a low functioning red-ray with an equally low functioning orange-ray can lead to medical issues like erectile dysfunction, does balancing these rays heal the medical issue?  Does crystallizing them create a sort of perpetuation or defense against the energy centers once more becoming distorted?

Because if they do, then this means scientifically we can potentially find a way to measure this effect by looking at what changes when one crystallizes their chakras.

I could probably make literally a 100 question list about just chakras alone, I've studied them a lot, and sometimes refer to myself as an amateur chakra reader to do divination readings for people.  The energetic chakra system is the one system in the Law of One that I am about 75% sure I reincarnated with knowledge already present.  I remember as a child I could feel 'energy' in the palms of my hands (which I now know are tertiary chakra points), and because I watched Dragon Ball Z, I used to pretend to do the kamehameha attack, and I could literally feel a vibrating frenzy of energy in my right hand whenever I would do this.
Similarly, I attuned myself to the show Naruto majorly because I liked it's idea of 'Chakra' being used, and found that certain hand signs do help me mold and weave my own chakric energies.
I even realized there's a small minor chakra below the red-ray (that I call the magenta-ray) that has two vortices and rotates in a way as to form the serpent look of the instreaming rising energy.  Furthermore this is posited in the vertebrae formations of the spine which largely correlate with chakra centers.
But like, that's my geeking out and I don't want to waste too much of your time >.<

Ah, I see your question now. And I definitely associate each chakra with its closest endocrine gland - so yes, I believe as you crystallize each chakra, not necessarily that your physical composition changes, but which chemicals your endocrine glands release are affected. Our hormonal outputs affect others around us, too - so yes, I that physical correlation is a big part of crystallizing the chakras. Sorry for not grasping your question properly.

For what it's worth, the physical cause of erectile dysfunction is a blockage of the arteries, and it's a symptom of pre-heart disease. You can extrapolate the metaphysical meaning behind this too (I try to)

I'm big on trying to understand the chakras, too, and drawing their physical correlations is a big deal. Ra says what isn't processed in the mind begins to manifest in the body - stomach ache? What is the orange chakra trying to tell you? (often for me: eat better food to take care of your body complex!)

14.  I actually don't fully agree with your explanation of the violet-ray, I've personally come to find that it is as is without the other chakras directly effecting it, but rather that it effects itself through effecting the other chakras.  Don't know why I felt the need to say this, but I felt like it, so that must mean something.  I've found that meditating upon my violet ray has led to many great intuitions about my other chakras, including moments of such precise intuition that I correctly realized I was HFA where the entire time I thought my mental illness was of some kind of schizoid disorder or even partial schizophrenia or even delusional disorder with the disorder being a delusion of belief of having a disorder.  Then when I went to get diagnosed it was like the pieces of the puzzle all just got thrown into place, the language issues growing up effecting my reading and writing skills, the flapping of my hands as a kid that I found so fun to do, the weird ways I thought and felt that seemed to separate me from everyone else.
I also swear I read Ra saying both the red and violet rays are fixed, but not in the same kinds of ways, with violet being fixated on the totality, while red-ray seemed to be fixated on the individual but I can't find the passage that says this, assuming my memory isn't being stupid  :-/
The information given is still helpful though.  Thank you, Jade.

That's cool, I can grasp that. I can't say I've had too many violet ray chakra meditations.

I found the "fixed red ray" quote, let's look at it in context:

34.13 Questioner: What is the general overall effect of television on our society with respect to this catalyst?

Ra: I am Ra. Without ignoring the green-ray attempts of many to communicate via this medium such information, truth, and beauty as may be helpful, we must suggest that the sum effect of this gadget is that of distraction and sleep.

34.14 Questioner: Can you give me the same type of information that we’ve been working on now with respect to the self relationship with war and rumors of war?
Ra: I am Ra. You may see this in relationship to your gadgets. This war and self relationship is a fundamental perception of the maturing entity. There is a great chance to accelerate in whatever direction is desired. One may polarize negatively by assuming bellicose attitudes for whatever reason. One may find oneself in the situation of war and polarize somewhat towards the positive activating orange, yellow, and then green by heroic, if you may call them this, actions taken to preserve the mind/body/spirit complexes of other-selves.

Finally, one may polarize very strongly third ray* by expressing the principle of universal love at the total expense of any distortion towards involvement in bellicose actions. In this way the entity may become a conscious being in a very brief span of your time/space. This may be seen to be what you would call a traumatic progression. It is to be noted that among your entities a large percentage of all progression has as catalyst, trauma.

* This should be fourth ray. Ra corrected the mistake in the next answer.

34.15 Questioner: You just used the term third ray in that statement. Was that the term you meant to use?

Ra: I am Ra. We intended the green ray. Our difficulty lies in our perception of red ray and violet ray as fixed; thus the inner rays are those which are varying and are to be observed as those indications of seniority in the attempts to form an harvest.

This is the end of a long series of questions, actually, about karma and catalyst. It seems to me, in context, that what Ra is saying is that the output of the red and violet rays have no polarity.

Ra follows up with this:

34.16 Questioner: Would the red ray, an intense red ray, then be used as an index for seniority, the seniority system of incarnation, as well as the intense violet ray?

Ra: I am Ra. This is partially correct. In the graduation or harvesting to fourth-density positive, the red ray is seen only as that, which being activated, is the basis for all that occurs in vibratory levels, the sum of this being violet-ray energy.

This violet ray is the only consideration for fourth-density positive. In assessing the harvestable fourth-density negative, the intensity of the red as well as the orange and the yellow rays is looked upon quite carefully as a great deal of stamina and energy of this type is necessary for the negative progression, it being extremely difficult to open the gateway to intelligent infinity from the solar plexus center. This is necessary for harvest in fourth-density negative.

Obviously Ra is implying that there are various "intensities" of the red ray. A negative entity needs a "more intense" red ray to reach the indigo by bypassing the heart.

16. I'm afraid I have done these things, and where they once helped me, no longer do, and I can't figure out why...  I've read that meditation is supposed to help mental illnesses, but in my case it exacerbates it sometimes, and other times it calms it.  I've come out of meditations perfectly fine one second only to suddenly be hit by crippling oceans of emotions, and other times I'd go for hours doing well with no issues.  It seems almost random.  The work I do on my chakras seems to be persistently stuck on my orange and yellow rays, no matter how much time, effort, patience, love, acceptance, forgiveness, the whole spectrum, and yet I cannot seem to balance them in such a way as to be minimally balanced consistently hour after hour.  Unless I could literally begin performing extended hours long meditations, I don't think I'm going to get anywhere unless something changes, and I don't know what that something is.

I'm still trying though, it can just become so frustrating when you spend 2 hours in a meditation and come out feeling wonderful, blissful, and joyous, then you stand up and you're hit with crippling depression out of nowhere.

It seems to me that what you are really struggling with the most is faith. You have to continue believing that these things help you, when you recognize they do. When you struggle, you can't attach to the struggle - you have to try to look at the struggle more lightly, to see the struggle as a "test" (initiation) for the new lessons that you have integrated. We've built these tests in for ourselves to escalate our difficulty of experience, because again, otherwise, we'd get bored and abandon our progress.

9/10 I get no direct stimulation/benefit/change in consciousness from my meditations. If I let my perceived accomplishments in the metaphysical realm decide whether or not I meditate, I wouldn't meditate at all! I do it because the Confederation insists that daily meditation is a necessary requirement to really hone one's efforts in working in consciousness. I have strong faith in that.

17. It makes me wonder, cause I see everything from 12:22, 12:34, 5:55, 4:44, 3:33...All of it, 4:56, 3:45, you name it I see it I bet.  In fact this occurs in military time, and on analog clocks (ON ANALOG CLOCKS!!  9:45, 8:40, 7:35, 6:30 and that's just when the hands are together).  Maybe one day we can all have a group meditation on the meanings of these alarm clock styled synchronicities.

My biggest and most reliable (daily) clock sync is :33. I think it would definitely be possible to do one of our midweek meditations as "Seeking synchronicities" or something along those lines. I'll put that one to work in the old noggin.

Thank you for all your time, sorry if my views are confrontational seeming or rude.  Turns out, when you're HFA, some times you come off rude and impolite without ever noticing it, I hope I haven't been that way in this post.  Genuinely thank you for your time.  It's always a pleasure talking to you even if it seems like it isn't.

Also, thank you everyone else so far who has answered.  Please don't think I don't appreciate your responses!  I just spent...omg, 4 hours responding just to Jade.  The way time flies when you don't want it to lol.  Everything given is helpful, I'll be responding in time...

I'm very happy to help, friend, and glad to see you back. I hope none of my answers caused more distress or confusion. I'll do my best to follow up again if you would like, too.