Into the Void

[VanAlioSaldo]

hi VAS-

The first reply I will make is that it would feel respectful if you thanked me for my offer of Usui Reiki and then explained/requested your "two conditions"...

(I say this because I wasn't asking for you to "agree" to a Reiki - but only offering it to you - as a possibility...

nb: 'permission' /'freewill' is essential in Reiki, (the Energy can not be sent/received without the recipients permission).

"A. Tell me what its like."  

A. Individual for each recipient.
LIGHT.
LOVE.
Safe.
What you most need at that moment in time.
Unique communication between you and 'Universal Life Force Energy' (which I am but the channel for). (Though my additional separate skill in clairvoyance augments my Reiki 'treatments'.)

"And B. Explain how you perform it mentally in your mind."

B. I am not allowed to - it is a sacred Initiation passed down over several thousand years... recently rediscovered in Japan in the late 1800's.
I am bound to secrecy about my Initiation and as to how I channel the Reiki. This is for protection of the purity of the LIGHT/Universal Life Force involved/embodied.

However, as said previously - it can not be forced onto/into any being.
It is absolute goodness... absolute LIGHT.... so it can only be positive or neutral.
Reiki has no capacity to force itself onto a recipient - nor would Reiki want to.

addendum:

Some possible 'reactions' : laughter, feeling warm, sleepiness. feeling nothing, feeling 'quiet and calm', slight agitation (which would be transmitted to me and I would (possibly) 'automatically' stop sending), feeling indescribable joy, peace, feeling sad (in a healing way), tears, having energy to do things, discomfort in the area of problem followed by heat there and then feeling better... feeling nothing... but then sleeping very well that evening.. reduction in appetite - or increase in appetite...etc

:idea:  it's a dialogue and energetic exchange/conversation between Your 'mind/body soul complex' and 'Universal Life Force Energy'... so each time will be a private and unique conversation between you - (I am the just the 'conduit'.. the 'facilitator')

nb: 'Faith' is not required..


any questions?  

Its Hard to say what the problem is.  I'd call it depression or emotional loneliness?

Its a weird question.  Why do I desire to be alone when others make me feel lonely?

Splash, I'll agree to a reiki working on two conditions, A. Tell me what its like.  And B. Explain how you perform it mentally in your mind.  Its the process that makes my mind roll into gear and lock into place reconfigurations of any kind offered to me.  Otherwise i find that the faith aspect alone while enough, leaves me thirsty for Comprehension..  Reiki is one of my spiritual desires i want to pick up~

Let me know please

I'm pretty passionate about...  Well.   Basically just the Law of One.  I can agree with you on the descriptory emotions though.  Although i experienced an emotion I'd liken to 'Positivity' during my work.
Now a days i feel like i don't look inwards into the right places haha

Let me start with...
Thank you for the offer, I must decline it though.  If not because I offended you, then because I have no idea how to respond to you.  I would have answered sooner but I didn't know how to say this, because I mean it in honesty and without negativity.

It is very odd being told I should thank someone offering a free service to me.  Especially with my manner of operations, and my experiences...My usual offering of services gets meet typically with silent appreciation, I sort of just assume most people are thankful for the consideration, and I was and am thankful that you'd offer aid to me so quickly and willingly.  That I offended alone makes me not want to ask you to do so though, feeling it'd just be unfair or odd.  I understand you pointed out my disrespectful approach, and I admit it was not thoughtful, it was disrespectful but I didn't intend to be!  I heard you say Reiki and my brain rocketed over to 'Want to Know' operation.  That it's one of those sacred guarded things is a bit off-putting for me, but ultimately I sort of understand at the same time why it's that way.

I however do willingly grant you permission to ever perform reiki working on me despite my declining your offer.  I declined you in respect that I disrespected you.  I truly did not mean to and if you still desire to do so...  Thank you.

Just know it is also odd hearing someone tell me I should thank them for their offering a free service to me, I was partially offended at first, until I realized not only do I totally agree with you (from an idealistic sense) but that I actually was more offended by my own lack of audacity to defend my own kindly services, and was just mirroring it at you (which is why I didn't respond right away...)  As such, I think I'll try what you did some time when I perceive being disrespected.

Thank you for the Catalyst, I would like your services if you still desire to offer them.

I too feel like my sense of self is hanging on by a thread, like I am the faintest of silhouettes and that I face an inescapable void which is just about ready to consume me.  Maybe it's time we let it do so.  You first hah. 

So, I did a meditation and let myself go into the void.  Let me say first off, I don't typically meditate holding items, so yesterday was my first attempt and it went splendidly, that amethyst orb of mine does the job.  I got to a point where I was completely numb, but not in a bad sense, felt closer to I was floating around but I was aware I was sitting but couldn't feel my body.  Then things got a bit more into perspective.

I guess a Void is dependent on it's contents.  A Void can be seen to be of two types, Primeval or Illusionary, with a Primeval Void being closer to a Portion of the Self we tread not.  Where we passively fill that present Void with our presence (we radiate ourselves into those places not yet touched).  This orients the primeval chaos of the void into order and makes it reflective, essentially awakening it to its true being 'It Is One'.  Then there is Illusionary, that being those perceptions, such as the one I have.
Inside that perception the void could be anything, from a true absence of, to in itself a being and entity.  I thought entering a void would cause death, in some dramatic way, of at least the mind.  Instead it's like Interstellar's idea of flying into a black hole (Gets intense, but you know...  ...You know... ...You know?).  After the event horizon it's pretty terrifying, its all uncharted territory but being consciousness it's like I'm not scared I'll die from a void.  But also being highly inexperienced with any concepts of mental exploration (cause I was doing that in some weird fun way) I just allowed myself to float 'deep in it' if you will, towards the darkest spots.  And it wasn't too bad overall.  It got incredibly dark in some ways and others I felt my energy body itself doing things, static jolts across my left knee area and my left hand, right hand holding the orb however was very relaxed and concentrated on holding the orb and connecting with it.  (Having a passive conscious motor function running forces me to be conscious, another of my issues was always losing coherency in awareness then dozing off instead of meditating continually).  After a while of looking at the habits and emotional thoughts my mind was automatically bringing up I felt like I was a part of the void, like I was just simply asleep.

I thought I'd be saddened to think my feeling so tired all the time will probably never go away unless I transform every last portion of the void into a full on Plenum.  Instead I think about my soul self's intentions behind this set up, and realize it isn't in absolutes.  Everyone is tired!  It's because we have in us places we rest within as if we were asleep during consciousness.  It's that jaded glossiness over some people, the numbness, and for others its that permanent furrowing of the brow in chronic discontent and dislike.  Others have it in sorrow and a few have it in indifference or frustration and judgment.

I'm as tired as I am because most of me is asleep constantly.  That's why having no desires makes sleep greatly enjoyable and death desirable, death and sleep are basically to the physical brain the same thing.  I guess in this sense of the void in our minds, they look Primeval, but are truly just fancified illusions.  Once you're inside it looks more like a place intentionally blotted out of existence to be experienced.  It's purpose believes itself to be absent, when it is in itself a purpose.  So it is a very confused and quiet and still place, but it is not hostile.  It is menacing on the outside, like I said, going into it was like Interstellar's idea of flying into a black hole.  It gets rough and a bit violent, but you won't get bent out of shape or hurt by the process, it's just there to shake you up.  Then you get inside and navigate passively as if predesigned (and I'm remembering this all somewhat by design too I think because I just had a dejavu moment of a mental view I had while inside the void, as I wrote that last sentence at 'predesigned').

So in ALL TRUE Actuality, the Void is your dark side.  Your Shadow Self, responding to your utmost ignorance of it on an unconscious level, because consciously admitting it isn't enough, that information needs to travel down through the roots of the mind into the unconscious.  Essentially, for me, it is me fulfilling my own desire to be gone from this place, without...Admitting it (despite just admitting it), so that I can fulfill that desire, but still live, despite knowing the costs, because I have some seriously odd priorities??????  (Hold on!  This was an incredibly twisted and complicated thoughtform I encountered while in the void.)  It was like my sadness and desires all were forcibly accepted into one odd configuration trying to be unitary when it was just...Desperation.  Yeah!  In desperation at the realization of being in hell I did this!

Okay, I remember it all now!  I thought I'd need to do a few more meditations to get back the first experiences from the first one.  In desperation of finding myself in Hell I needed to fix things, needed a way out that was solution oriented and fair to me and all of my desires in a manner that was, honestly purely selfishly oriented towards survival of my Free Will, more than my Sanity.  Which basically was like handing to my darker portions this massive burden and saying 'This too I trust/thrust upon you' and the burden causing the same effect, but inside that environment the only way to basically be gone is to 'avoid' or create a void, in this instance a Sleeping Void (which is ironic to the literal to 'a'bsence created 'a'-void, which is a void that is in itself not a true void but an illusion through some mannerism, this one being Sleep to mimic Death).  It was always present but the properties didn't used to be 'void', it used to just be those dark things I didn't truly accept and believe in of myself.  Those desires I felt I'd never obtain or fulfill, or was embarrassed or ashamed of to the point of completely forgetting all about it.

So now the work of figuring out how to undo my own self-created mental instability needs to be done on a Yellow Ray level to even create an environment to begin transforming the void into a plenum.  Done by myself, consciously in desperation, to 'avoid' the pain.

No idea if any of this is helpful to you Folk.  Your question caused me to really...Get in there, made me remember a lot of things I forgot in my meditation.