12-11-2010, 11:28 PM
(This post was last modified: 12-12-2010, 06:58 AM by Nabil Naser.)
I was about 10 years old, when with tears on my cheeks, I looked up to the sky and denied God. You don't exist. I yelled. If you did, you would not cause all this misery to people. I don't remember what made me sad and angry at God. My family was, and to some degree still is, religious. I went to Catholic school and was an altar boy. Many within my extended family worked and lived in the church, as priests, nuns, or helpers. But on that day, I began a journey that lasted more than 20 years.
My dad, while far from being rich, was an intellectual who spoke several languages, and we had a decent library with many of the major literary classics, which I read with excitement and enthusiasm. Even during my teenage years, as I was always looking for better understanding of the world. And once I had denied that God existed, I had to find an alternative. If God didn't do all this, then what did?
My college years where a mix of study, wild behavior, and melancholy. After college, and once in the real world of family and work, the same old questions started demanding answers. I had worked out a principle years back, that said, "everything is connected connected to everything else, without a beginning or an end". For some reason this seemed to make sense to me. Perhaps because of my belief in social justice, or because I couldn't find a better explanation.
After a particularly difficult period of time, about 20 years ago, I sought help, and was introduced to meditation. What happened after that, is still happening now. A new world opened up for me. I began reading books as if they where the most important thing in the world. I averaged more that a book a week for the next 10 years. While some where fiction, many were on physics, genetics, chemistry, scripture, theosophy, philosophy, computer technology, psychology and more.
One of these books was The Ra Material. I can say with certainty that the teachings of Ra where a major catalyst for my desire to read. I found that other books are talking about what Ra said. This became very fascinating, and set me on a journey to find more books that relate to Ra's ideas.
Today, I feel that I am finally over my denial of God. In the back of my mind, I was never really sure. I have forgiven God and myself for my outburst when I was a child.
Now, I understand what God is. And I feel comfort in knowing that I can't be separated from the creator.
It has been a very interesting journey so far. There was a lot of suffering without a doubt. But looking back, I don't see how else I could have learned what I know now. Am I grateful for the suffering? I can't say that I am, and I hope it will not visit soon.
I am here to share with you what I have leaned from all these books that I have read. I want to share with you the connections between Ra's words, and what can be found in many other books.
Ra said that information has been passed through many books, with some veiling. I am uncovering the veil.
Love, light and Peace
Nabil
My dad, while far from being rich, was an intellectual who spoke several languages, and we had a decent library with many of the major literary classics, which I read with excitement and enthusiasm. Even during my teenage years, as I was always looking for better understanding of the world. And once I had denied that God existed, I had to find an alternative. If God didn't do all this, then what did?
My college years where a mix of study, wild behavior, and melancholy. After college, and once in the real world of family and work, the same old questions started demanding answers. I had worked out a principle years back, that said, "everything is connected connected to everything else, without a beginning or an end". For some reason this seemed to make sense to me. Perhaps because of my belief in social justice, or because I couldn't find a better explanation.
After a particularly difficult period of time, about 20 years ago, I sought help, and was introduced to meditation. What happened after that, is still happening now. A new world opened up for me. I began reading books as if they where the most important thing in the world. I averaged more that a book a week for the next 10 years. While some where fiction, many were on physics, genetics, chemistry, scripture, theosophy, philosophy, computer technology, psychology and more.
One of these books was The Ra Material. I can say with certainty that the teachings of Ra where a major catalyst for my desire to read. I found that other books are talking about what Ra said. This became very fascinating, and set me on a journey to find more books that relate to Ra's ideas.
Today, I feel that I am finally over my denial of God. In the back of my mind, I was never really sure. I have forgiven God and myself for my outburst when I was a child.
Now, I understand what God is. And I feel comfort in knowing that I can't be separated from the creator.
It has been a very interesting journey so far. There was a lot of suffering without a doubt. But looking back, I don't see how else I could have learned what I know now. Am I grateful for the suffering? I can't say that I am, and I hope it will not visit soon.
I am here to share with you what I have leaned from all these books that I have read. I want to share with you the connections between Ra's words, and what can be found in many other books.
Ra said that information has been passed through many books, with some veiling. I am uncovering the veil.
Love, light and Peace
Nabil
Maybe we all can create some kind of meaning here that has meaning to all of us. 
