Multi-dimensional BEing

[Lulu]

I think for me I just was not ready to admit that-
1. Evil beings exist and
2. They would have any interest in me if they did

yes I know what you mean. It also indicates how you/we got into the mess --a lack of worthiness, in it's antithesis is hoping to be special. That was another hook for me that was brought in and used magnificently. I was presented with many ideals of history, and told I was reincarnations of some considered worthy in our history.

Certainly, like most of us we do have savior complexes resting deep in us. I sure did, though I would never have admitted it.

Your moms response is confirmation on the worthiness lack. What a messed up world that we all are so unworthy. At one point I got to feel the bottom of what that is, and it was lower than a lowest caste person or slave, for 24 hours I felt as if I did not have the "right" to walk on the earth nor the "right" to even take my own life. Interestingly enough, though I could FEEL the feelings, I also knew they were not MINE and were being downloaded into me.

I'm glad your still here zanny, I think few can relate.

Lulu