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Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-12-2012
I'm Lulu. My story is incomplete and rather complicated and long so I will not be able to post it here. I'll include at least one link and more as I complete my full story as best I can.
I went through some unusual experiences a few years ago that changed how I view everything about my existence. I now know my own multi-dimensionality, including how I am interacting in other realms/dimensions/densities and how those from others are interacting with me here.
I'll include a link that is the 2nd part of my story here http://lululoisa.blogspot.com/2012/01/part-ii-orgasmic-states-of-being.html for anyone who is interested. The earliest part of my story is not completed as it is the most difficult to write about because there was so much chaos in the interactions in other realms that merged here. It was as if portals in three dimensions opened at once flooding in information and experiences from the past/present/future and in that way "timeless" creating much confusion.
Just to give you a taste this is part of a letter I sent to the CIA telling them to call off their super-agent, just to give you an idea of just SOME of the experiences and my lack of understanding at that point of how the Illuminati works FROM multi-dimensional realms rather than sitting in an underground basement harassing others.
(what the "super-agent" who was really a multi-dimensional being/s was able to do)
1. Highly advanced better than 20/20 remote viewing that includes increased sound and smell;
2. Being merged with other souls or acting as several beings;
3. Beyond genius-level pattern recognition and mind plays/games using others largest desires as weaknesses and at their level of consciousness;
4. Ability to steal energy (literally energy vampirism) to drain the victim and make them ill;
5. Highly able to influence/implant others thoughts, feelings and emotions, dreams and visions;
6. Ability to change his own frequencies to be able to access the victim psychically at all times;
7. Ability to send damaging and very painful frequencies to the victim to painfully disable them;
8. Ability to create and remote-send smell and sound.
9. Time travel, and astral travel (as he was able to sort through my past/childhood and use that information to have influence over me);
10. Ability to foresee the future based on most-influential patterns leading to manifestations, and literally able to SEE future images.
11. All manor of cyber-tinkering including hacking.
I later realized that there is a powerful group of multi-dimensional beings that we cannot see in this dimension, who have the abilities to influence and manipulate many of us here who are in physical. In fact we are under constant interaction with soul/spirit forms of all of our past, from our personal ansestrial ones, enemies, loved ones, angelic and celestial beings to dark manipulative controlling entities. Of course they are interacting based upon your law of attraction as an individual and also as a collective however with enough manipulation, as you can see by the above list, law of attraction becomes something we become programmed to attract that would benefit them.
I hope to make some new friendships and enjoy discussions about our current issues of the world in relation to how we are being influenced from those realms including Illuminati, Federations etc. And what we can and should do about it --including becoming aware of not only how we are being influenced but also how to become aware of OUR power and influence through love to those both here and in these other densities/dimensions.
I hope to find this a friendly and respectful, intelligent and stimulating forum that is "Productive" ;-).
Please say hello or ask me any questions or share your stories with me if you get the impulse to do so. :-)
Thank you! Lulu
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Shemaya - 03-12-2012
Hi Lulu,
Welcome to the Bring4th forums and thanks for sharing your story.
Wow, what an intense experience you have been through, my heart goes out to you. <3 You are so strong! And you are loved and you are not alone <3
I can relate to what you've written, I had a similar strange experience that was very intense. Things have really stabilized for me finally and I am in a much better place now
Love and light to you!
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Ankh - 03-13-2012
Lulu (and Shemaya since you could relate to her experience) - do you believe/think that you two might be 3/4D dual activated entities?
Welcome on board, Lulu!
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Parsons - 03-13-2012
Glad to hear more of your story. Good to have you with us and I hope that we can be of service to you and vis versa.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Shemaya - 03-13-2012
(03-13-2012, 05:43 PM)Ankh Wrote: Lulu (and Shemaya since you could relate to her experience) - do you believe/think that you two might be 3/4D dual activated entities?
Welcome on board, Lulu!
I'm not sure about that, don't think so, though I was a very sensitive child. That's a long story
. In 2007 I experienced a spiritual emergence/ transpersonal crisis/ bordering on spiritual emergency in which my energy body was activated and over activated to a degree that I experienced an influx of catalysts that took quite some time to integrate. It was a confusing time for me, and I would not wish that intensity on anyone else.Lulu, my heart goes out to you because from what I read of your story, it has been extremely intense for you since this process started. Keep feeling and seeking. Trust that God is good and that help and support is there for you.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-13-2012
(03-13-2012, 05:43 PM)Ankh Wrote: Lulu (and Shemaya since you could relate to her experience) - do you believe/think that you two might be 3/4D dual activated entities?Thank you for the warm welcome, both of you!
Welcome on board, Lulu!
hmmm -- interesting! Good question! I would love to know more and compare experiences. I think it's difficult for us to put into words what has happened. Maybe this inspires me to finish part I of my story or at least post what I have so far.
Ankh, I had not heard the word dual "activated" entities anywhere yet. Is there information somewhere from Ra or other on that please? The word "activated" totally rings true.
I don't know for you Shemaya but during most of the "connection" it seemed to represent twin-flames (for lack of better word) however it was not something that felt intrinsically true so I felt much resistance in the idea of twin-flames. The astounding unusual connection, telepathic etc and all the syncronicties to "prove it" did keep me resistively yet still engaged in the exchange.
Much later through discovery on searching for information and through having had experiences and finally upon a greater disconnection I felt it was indeed from a lower density/dimension. This must be where the "activation" exist. Later the best I could do was know it was from a different "god-construct part of the universe". Perhaps a replicated area of the universe. At the start of things in this realm, I was coerced innocently in a sense, into a so-called "dna activation" by someone of the same collective with the same skills/vibrations and nearly everything of those whom I interacted with.
That totally makes sense for the 3/4D! I know I was not in 3/4D at the time I was dna activated. It's worth noting: I have heard if we do not do our "emotional work" when we reach the threshold of the 6th the keepers send us back to the 3rd where we do eventually have to deal with our emotions which are connected to our deeper souls desires. (sorry don't have the Ra wordage on that).
Shemaya, I don't know about you but for me the motivation from this collective entity was to destroy me if I could not be used and controlled for whatever those purposes and motivations of theirs.
However there was a longing to connect that continued in me and I always felt the entity/collective was growing and evolving along with me and that was how we could maintain and regain our connection. There would be brief periods where contact was nearly lost, then I would feel an intense sadness/despair/lonliness that came from it and my own longing and again we would join but not as "screwed up" and not from as far in the past.
Also to share openly I would say at times I could see that I was cuffed and held in bondage and was some sort of "bride" or married in a sense to the collective. I know that sounds weird but... and there were MANY different things happening at once during one period. The married thing was far from the only theme so apologies if my stories at times seem conflicted, this is just one of the reasons it's so difficult to explain and piece together and even to write about.
Oddly enough I recently discovered yet another person who I could tell by my feeling/interaction/sensations is part of the collective or at least each other. This interaction was like meeting one of the top of the hierarchy of the collective.
To me, the benefit in recognizing this person as part of this powerful collective that I was Mind controlled into is not only was I able to finally confirm that the entity was indeed, just as I had suspected part of a collective--but in addition I was able to finalize a statement of sovereignty and what seems to be yet another level of clearing of the entity/collective and myself, and perhaps others.
Now, my mystery is not complete, there is still much I desire to understand. I still have "head sensations". Fortunately they are a fraction of what how they felt at the beginning (end of 2008). I would like to know if this is a byproduct of the effects of all of the experiences having created a sensitivity or if this is the entity/collective resistance I'm feeling but THROUGH it interaction with others!?!
If it is the entity/ collective this brings up yet another MAJOR layer to be dealt with to be freed even in our society. A possible strong-hold if you will. I have until now having wrote that, thought of it as a byproduct of sensitivity in myself.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - godwide_void - 03-13-2012
Welcome to the forum, my friend.
I hope you enjoy your stay here!Lulu, your story was very intriguing and piqued my curiosity; I'd really like to hear more of this alleged multi-dimensional 'fiend' which harassed you and what was your literal connection to those you term the Illuminati?
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Ankh - 03-14-2012
(03-13-2012, 11:18 PM)Lulu Wrote: Ankh, I had not heard the word dual "activated" entities anywhere yet. Is there information somewhere from Ra or other on that please? The word "activated" totally rings true.
Follow this "ringing". It may be your intuition trying to tell you something. Even if turns out not be the case later, it may lead you on the "right track" so to speak.
Some Ra quotes about dual activated entities:
Ra Wrote:63.13 Questioner: Now these entities incarnate into a third-density vibratory body. I am trying to understand how this transition takes place from third to fourth-density. I will take the example of one of these entities of which we are speaking who is now in a third-density body. He will grow older and then will it be necessary that he die from the third-density physical body and reincarnate in a fourth-density body for that transition?
Ra: I am Ra. These entities are those incarnating with what you may call a double body in activation. It will be noted that the entities birthing these fourth-density entities experience a great feeling of, shall we say, the connection and the use of spiritual energies during pregnancy. This is due to the necessity for manifesting the double body.
This transitional body is one which will be, shall we say, able to appreciate fourth-density vibratory complexes as the instreaming increases without the accompanying disruption of the third-density body. If a third-density entity were, shall we say, electrically aware of fourth-density in full, the third-density electrical fields would fail due to incompatibility.
To answer your query about death, these entities will die according to third-density necessities.
Ra Wrote:66.7 Questioner: What about the ones with the dual type of activated third and fourth-density bodies, harvested from other third-density planets? Are they able to heal using the techniques that we have discussed?
Ra: I am Ra. In many cases this is so, but as beginners of fourth-density, the desire may not be present.
Ra Wrote:65.19 Questioner: Thank you. The forgetting process was puzzling me because you said that the fourth-density activated people who were here who had been harvested did not have the same forgetting problem. Could you tell me why the Wanderer loses his memory?
Ra: I am Ra. The reason is twofold. First, the genetic properties of the connection between the mind/body/spirit complex and the cellular structure of the body is different for third-density than for third/fourth-density.
Secondly, the free will of third-density entities needs be preserved. Thus Wanderers volunteer for third-density genetic or DNA connections to the mind/body/spirit complex. The forgetting process can be penetrated to the extent of the Wanderer remembering what it is and why it is upon the planetary sphere. However, it would be an infringement if Wanderers penetrated the forgetting so far as to activate the more dense bodies and thus be able to live, shall we say, in a god-like manner. This would not be proper for those who have chosen to serve.
The new fourth-density entities which are becoming able to demonstrate various newer abilities are doing so as a result of the present experience, not as a result of memory. There are always a few exceptions, and we ask your forgiveness for constant barrages of over-generalization.
Above quotes is something to begin with. There are probably more. Let me know if you wish me to find more for you, and also present some information about it from Q'uo sessions. Q'uo consist of three social memory complexes, Hatonn which is fourth density, Latui/Latwii who is fifth density and their teacher Ra, sixth density. Latui is the one usually speaking. Q'uo has been channeled by L/L Research until April the 15th, 2011, in conscious state.
Lulu Wrote:If it is the entity/ collective this brings up yet another MAJOR layer to be dealt with to be freed even in our society. A possible strong-hold if you will. I have until now having wrote that, thought of it as a byproduct of sensitivity in myself.
If you are dual activated, this entity/collective *may* be your future social memory complex. That's my theory. Those of fourth density incarnating here in this moment, have not yet built a social memory complex so they are not unified yet, but will learn to do so as soon as this third density experience is finished upon this Earth.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Shemaya - 03-14-2012
Yes , Lulu, it was a "twin flame" experience. I say that because a voice boomed out of the heavens, " I am your twin flame". At the time I didn't understand what that meant and what I was supposed to do.
Looking back now, it was a preincarnative plan that provided me with a s***load of catalyst in order to have a very a rapid transformation and growth of mind, body, and spirit.
I still think the " twin flame" idea is a bit hokey...when I get on the other side I am sure I will understand much better.
It really was a spiritual emergence/emergency. I sought out many avenues and helpers to help me understand the experience. Much later I discovered information about spiritual emergency...after I had gotten through the most difficult parts of the experience. This helped put things into a mental/ intellectual understanding so that my powerful emotions did not pull me off-center so easily.
The Ra material has information on Archetypes/ tarot and lately I have been studying these to get a deeper grasp on what happened. It was an experience of living the archetype now that I look back. Strength card has been particularly important in getting understanding of the experience.
L/L
Just to add, I did not have so much of the negative greeting that you are describing. That's another aspect that you are dealing with that I didn't encounter so much, but it is common in the kind of emergence you have experienced.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-14-2012
Thank you Shemaya for sharing, it's all very interesting.
I have determined the twin-flames thing is most likely one of the first two (what do you think based on your experiences?):
1. A clever trick by other spirits/entities used to manipulate others.
2. An "assigned entity exchange in the lower densities (that we were pulled or sent back to).
Or this (not likely)
3. Our actual other half of a split soul. (I toss this option as it doesn't "fit" with the collective MIND, which I feel was confirmed as part of it). Of course there could be some hidden layers within including that you and I are part of an opposing collective SOUL.
Does anyone know of any links to Ra's material where he Talks in depth about the actual Purpose of the Law of Confusion?
I was asked what I thought evil was during my dna download workshop, I said "confusion". I was indicating that as I saw it people did harmful things that are considered evil because they are in confused states of existence. That and several other things that I had shared seemed to have been used later to keep me engaged in interaction. I refer to it as manipulated synchronicity.
Lulu
If you are dual activated, this entity/collective *may* be your future social memory complex. That's my theory. Those of fourth density incarnating here in this moment, have not yet built a social memory complex so they are not unified yet, but will learn to do so as soon as this third density experience is finished upon this Earth.
[/quote]
ewww interesting!! I was only guessing as of the "past".
I have already considered I won't likely be part of any collective. I can't even be in one here on earth now. I don't conform or exist in groups. I can maintain family but I'm not attached. I'm always breaking barriers and moving on.
As I see it I will be most likely shifting between densities at will just as I do already. Many of my dreams are such.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - βαθμιαίος - 03-14-2012
(03-14-2012, 10:45 PM)Lulu Wrote: Does anyone know of any links to Ra's material where he Talks in depth about the actual Purpose of the Law of Confusion?
You could try this search: http://www.lawofone.info/results.php?search_string=law+of+confusion&search_type=phrase&row_limit=100&numeric_order=1&ss=1&sc=1
Ra basically uses "Law of Confusion" as a synonym for "Law of Free Will."
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Shemaya - 03-14-2012
I think that there is truth to it, Ra speaks of it briefly. But the idea has been manipulated by those on the dark path in order to add to our confusion , and sidetrack us off the straight and narrow path. This for me was the Two Paths archetype which is archetype six, also known as the Lovers. When I first encountered this archetype during my experience it was signaling activation, an intense body activation. But as I delve deeper into this there is a lot more to it than that, it was an activation, but also process of finding my own way, rather than being led astray by information and energy that did not align with my deepest desires and truth. It was a choice to follow the truth in my heart, rather than an oppressive path that wasn't resonating with my soul.
For me it was / is an experience of the balancing of the masculine and feminine energies on this planet, primarily through forgiveness of the oppressive patriarchal forces manifested in our religions and institutions, and our collective psyche. And the empowerment of the feminine ....there has been a concerted effort to keep the feminine suppressed through our recent history, (few thousand years). If I can balance this within myself, and step into my power I will move forward. So it is definitely a work in progress.
I agree with you that there are entities that wish to manipulate us and lead us astray. But I think there is truth to the "twin flame" experience and it is serving a purpose. But I don' t think it for us to meet up with *one* person who will make us happy and complete us so will live happily ever after. To me it' s more balancing these powerful energies so that there is a sacred union of male and female on this planet, so that we can manifest together a beautiful peaceful joyful, love-filled new Earth.
The feminine sexual power is tapped right into life- force, Ra calls intelligent energy, I think if I am making the right analogy. This is our powerful creative energy that we as humans have in order to manifest in creation....and because females are directly connected to this force, that is why the dark entities have orchestrated such a massive attack on the feminine. As we are awakening we are seeing through the illusions and deceptions and coming in touch with our creative power.
I might be rambling here Lulu, I hope some of what I say is helpful to you....if it doesn't resonate with you just disregard. It is validating to me just knowing that others have had a " twin flame" experience. I still feel silly if I say it out loud, but it happened and there was a reason for it.
L/L
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-14-2012
(03-14-2012, 10:53 PM)βαθμιαίος Wrote:(03-14-2012, 10:45 PM)Lulu Wrote: Does anyone know of any links to Ra's material where he Talks in depth about the actual Purpose of the Law of Confusion?
You could try this search: http://www.lawofone.info/results.php?search_string=law+of+confusion&search_type=phrase&row_limit=100&numeric_order=1&ss=1&sc=1
Ra basically uses "Law of Confusion" as a synonym for "Law of Free Will."
thanks B.
ya I had tried that search before and it only added to my "confusion"...lol.
I can't wrap my brain around FREE WILL as a SYNONYM of CONFUSION. Seems to me more of an ANTITHESIS!!
I haven't decided what to "trust" of Ra's stuff yet. There are very few channeled entities I can "look UP to" and certainly not many translators.
But tey all do have something to offer and all are in different places. What is empowering to one is disempowering to another.
I have discovered there is often much truth with sometimes one little contaminant that has a great enough effect to cause a wreckage of infection to yet again control others.
(03-14-2012, 11:50 PM)Lulu Wrote:(03-14-2012, 10:53 PM)βαθμιαίος Wrote:(03-14-2012, 10:45 PM)Lulu Wrote: Does anyone know of any links to Ra's material where he Talks in depth about the actual Purpose of the Law of Confusion?
You could try this search: http://www.lawofone.info/results.php?search_string=law+of+confusion&search_type=phrase&row_limit=100&numeric_order=1&ss=1&sc=1
Ra basically uses "Law of Confusion" as a synonym for "Law of Free Will."
thanks B.
ya I had tried that search before and it only added to my "confusion"...lol.
I can't wrap my brain around FREE WILL as a SYNONYM of CONFUSION. Seems to me more of an ANTITHESIS!!
I haven't decided what to "trust" of Ra's stuff yet. There are very few channeled entities I can "look UP to" and certainly not many translators.
But tey all do have something to offer and all are in different places. What is empowering to one is disempowering to another.
I have discovered there is often much truth with sometimes one little contaminant that has a great enough effect to cause a wreckage of infection to yet again control others.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - βαθμιαίος - 03-15-2012
(03-14-2012, 11:50 PM)Lulu Wrote: ya I had tried that search before and it only added to my "confusion"...lol.
I can't wrap my brain around FREE WILL as a SYNONYM of CONFUSION. Seems to me more of an ANTITHESIS!!
I think the idea is that the choice isn't truly free unless it's made blindly.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Ankh - 03-15-2012
(03-15-2012, 01:05 PM)βαθμιαίος Wrote: I think the idea is that the choice isn't truly free unless it's made blindly.
I'll bet that if unity100 would still be a member of this board, he would have some strong opinions about that!
Thank you for offering this understanding. Loved it!
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-16-2012
hey all, not sure where to go from here. Please find me on Facebook if you want to stay in touch I'm just not feeling the Ra vibe in the same way you all are. Actually it took alot of "healing" to even be able to approach a forum that subscribes to the words of any of the Egyptian based "gods". Of course before my experiences ALL were amazing, wonderful, welcome etc.
Anyways here is my FB if anyone wants to befriend there I can add you to groups as well.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 03-19-2012
http://lulu(removed)
Here is a little more of my story. The early beginning.
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - zanny - 04-11-2012
Hi, Lulu and welcome to the forum,
I first want to say how brave you are for writing about your experiences here. I went through a similar experience and I am slowly coming out of my intense state of confusion over the whole thing and how quickly it progressed. I have been truly baffled at times, but after reading your post (and 2yrs of deep contemplation) I think you have a very good handle on the situation.
I think for me I just was not ready to admit that-
1. Evil beings exist and
2. They would have any interest in me if they did.
I remember when I was freaking out, (being followed, psychic attacks, and dream raped) I told my Mom about it and she said- "You are not important enough for a being (beings) to expend so much energy on". I think she meant well and she is the only one who listened and supported me during that time. But, I also believe sometimes you just have to- call a spade a spade. It's simpler that way.
I have profound gratitude in my heart for you right now... Sometimes, all we need to get through a tough situation, is to know someone has gone through it, and we are not alone.
Thank you,
zanny
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 04-12-2012
(04-11-2012, 02:13 PM)zanny Wrote: I think for me I just was not ready to admit that-
1. Evil beings exist and
2. They would have any interest in me if they did
yes I know what you mean. It also indicates how you/we got into the mess --a lack of worthiness, in it's antithesis is hoping to be special. That was another hook for me that was brought in and used magnificently. I was presented with many ideals of history, and told I was reincarnations of some considered worthy in our history.
Certainly, like most of us we do have savior complexes resting deep in us. I sure did, though I would never have admitted it.
Your moms response is confirmation on the worthiness lack. What a messed up world that we all are so unworthy. At one point I got to feel the bottom of what that is, and it was lower than a lowest caste person or slave, for 24 hours I felt as if I did not have the "right" to walk on the earth nor the "right" to even take my own life. Interestingly enough, though I could FEEL the feelings, I also knew they were not MINE and were being downloaded into me.
I'm glad your still here zanny, I think few can relate.
Lulu
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - zanny - 04-13-2012
(04-12-2012, 12:38 AM)Lulu Wrote:(04-11-2012, 02:13 PM)zanny Wrote: I think for me I just was not ready to admit that-
1. Evil beings exist and
2. They would have any interest in me if they did
yes I know what you mean. It also indicates how you/we got into the mess --a lack of worthiness, in it's antithesis is hoping to be special. That was another hook for me that was brought in and used magnificently. I was presented with many ideals of history, and told I was reincarnations of some considered worthy in our history.
Certainly, like most of us we do have savior complexes resting deep in us. I sure did, though I would never have admitted it.
Your moms response is confirmation on the worthiness lack. What a messed up world that we all are so unworthy. At one point I got to feel the bottom of what that is, and it was lower than a lowest caste person or slave, for 24 hours I felt as if I did not have the "right" to walk on the earth nor the "right" to even take my own life. Interestingly enough, though I could FEEL the feelings, I also knew they were not MINE and were being downloaded into me.
I'm glad your still here zanny, I think few can relate.
Lulu
I think you are very intuitive Lulu. When you mention these -hooks- it resonates with me strongly...Every hook you have mentioned has helped me see- where and how- I was hooked and manipulated. This has really helped with my understanding and my healing process.
I was at the time doing a good job of fending off the negative- spiritually- But when I had a 3d person sitting in front of me- my guard was completely down. He said all the right things to catch my interest and when I started to feel something was amiss, my conditioning of- human social protocol- prevented me from heeding these internal warnings. I, of course, take full responsibility for this. I am not looking for someone to blame, I simply want to understand what happened and why. (what within me made me so vulnerable to these manipulations.) That is why I am so grateful for your posts...Your insights into your own experience has helped me gain insight into the how and why of my own.
Once my guard was down to this person, I was open season for the rest...And then the situation was (for a time) completely crazy...I was using every ounce of my energy to fight this battle emotionally, spiritually, and physically, that I was completely exhausted, and many times almost just gave up...
So, I am also glad that I am "still here" because I almost wasn't. I hope that your post, and maybe even mine, helps others who might be struggling to know that- It may be difficult, it may be the hardest battle of your life, you may be confused and feel like you are losing, but you have the power to get through it and will be stronger for it. And you will learn a great deal about yourself in the process.
zanny
RE: Multi-dimensional BEing - Lulu - 04-13-2012
Yes, I can relate with all of that. I too just wanted answers and not in avoidance of responsibility but rather to understand. It was the first time in my life, I could not understand a motive of another! I am still shocked at the thought that there are others walking the planet attached to spirits with a mind like Hitler who would be more than obliged to do their Duty to purge the planet. These beings have become so closed off in fear, they seek revenge and power through Enslavement of others.
I will send you the link that blew me away with answers finally, last year at this time. It was a huge relief to finally make sense of much of what happened.
Thank you Zanny!
Lulu
As for the Vulnerability ---well... I'll send you another link on that and see if you can finish the process. I was surprised at the next step. It's not anything to do with Ra teachings so I'll keep it private.
Lulu