Suicide

[Kaaron]

I think I sabotage alot of things in my life by expecting something that's the opposite of what's really going on and then manifesting it by acting like it's already happened.
That's what my partner says I do and I think she's right.

I commend your ability to self observe.

As somebody who has learned this the hard way many times, don't forget this momentous realization. It is a painful lesson to undergo multiple times. I say that out of compassion. Do your best to pay more attention to what is going right, than what is going wrong. The results will be deceptively natural (like they had nothing to do with your thoughts), but it is the difference between a happy future and despondent one. If there is any question as to where your thoughts are pointed, do a gut check and see how you feel. Thoughts of well being FEEL like well being.    

I think when I don't forgive someone, it leads to me not forgiving me...which leads to whatever inception follows...
Then I play out that reality like it's the only one...when in actuality, it's only the one that I live when I'm unforgiving.