About your experience I can't say I know what it was, I'd think if you ponder about it more then maybe you will perceive something.
About meditation, I don't think it is a duty to do and should come from your own desire to do it and that it becomes more and more natural with time. So give yourself a break. If you need time for yourself doing what you feel like doing, then do so without seeing a problem with it, be happy you get to enjoy these creations made by others.
If I had to give you an advice, I'd say focus on your own well being and observe that this alone will bring all the change that you desire for yourself. Respect yourself and love yourself both for your shortcomings and strong points, perceive that everything you seek already is within yourself and that it is only a matter of opening yourself to what you already are and always were, love and light.
About meditation, I don't think it is a duty to do and should come from your own desire to do it and that it becomes more and more natural with time. So give yourself a break. If you need time for yourself doing what you feel like doing, then do so without seeing a problem with it, be happy you get to enjoy these creations made by others.
If I had to give you an advice, I'd say focus on your own well being and observe that this alone will bring all the change that you desire for yourself. Respect yourself and love yourself both for your shortcomings and strong points, perceive that everything you seek already is within yourself and that it is only a matter of opening yourself to what you already are and always were, love and light.
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