2007.11.10 World Religions and Surrender

[Monica]

This session really delves into the essence of the world's major religions, and why some people are attracted to a certain religion, while others might be attracted to another...and how the Law of One compares and contrasts with the various religions.

I don't see the Law of One as a religion at all, though it is a philosophy which I have chosen as the foundation for my own personal spiritual path.

Recently, a friend (who happens to belong to a Christian religion) asked me how both could be valid paths...I replied that I think of the various religions as being branches on a tree...but the Law of One being the tree...reaching deep into the Earth and high into the Heavens, in pursuit of Truth.

I am interested in discussing how others integrate the Law of One teachings with their other spiritual practices...do you adhere to a religion? Did you experience conflicts with your religion, or were you able to integrate the LOO teachings seamlessly...perhaps adding fullness of understanding to your chosen spiritual path? Or are the LOO teachings the foundation of your spiritual path?

http://www.llresearch.org/transcripts/is..._1110.aspx

Please see also 2007.11.10. which is related.

[Bring4th_Steve]

...I am interested in discussing how others integrate the Law of One teachings with their other spiritual practices...do you adhere to a religion? Did you experience conflicts with your religion, or were you able to integrate the LOO teachings seamlessly...perhaps adding fullness of understanding to your chosen spiritual path? Or are the LOO teachings the foundation of your spiritual path?

For me, ever since I boiled down the LOO material as being a basic unit of love and truth, I've always compared religions and dogmas to the LOO, instead of adhering a religion to the LOO. I feel that if someone really resonates with the LOO, it is likely they are using religion for other purposes. Perhaps someone enjoys the social aspect of religion. Or another may enjoy the ceremony protocol. For others it could very well be a type of "comfort food" that strikes a chord with childhood.

I have just never run into anyone who is a devout [name your religion], but also a scholor or enthusiast of the LOO principles. That's why I think many people equate the LOO material to something like a dogma, even though most of us realize it's not.

Steve

[Monica]

For me, ever since I boiled down the LOO material as being a basic unit of love and truth, I've always compared religions and dogmas to the LOO, instead of adhering a religion to the LOO. I feel that if someone really resonates with the LOO, it is likely they are using religion for other purposes. Perhaps someone enjoys the social aspect of religion. Or another may enjoy the ceremony protocol. For others it could very well be a type of "comfort food" that strikes a chord with childhood.

I have just never run into anyone who is a devout [name your religion], but also a scholor or enthusiast of the LOO principles. That's why I think many people equate the LOO material to something like a dogma, even though most of us realize it's not.

Steve

Hmmmm...interesting.

If, by 'devout' you mean 'adhering steadfastly to established doctrine' of said religion, then I would agree.

I think the difference lies in the use of the terms 'dogma' (belief) vs 'doctrine' (set of rules one must abide by, to be considered a part of that faith).

The LOO certainly could be said to have dogma, though not in the rigid sense, and certainly not in the doctrinal sense.

I was thinking more in terms with finding an enhanced understanding of the essence of that religion, such as what our own dear Carla has done with Christianity. I don't want to speak for Carla, of course, but I had gotten the impression from her that her Christian faith had been enhanced by the LOO, rather than replaced by it.

I recently met someone who follows a very strict adherence to the letter of his chosen doctrine, to the point of looking up words in the original language, etc., and he seemed to me to embody the principles of the LOO more beautifully than just about anyone I'd ever met...somehow he was able to find the love in his religion, not because of the doctrine, but despite it.

Of course, this was only my own observation, and he had never heard of the LOO. But it was interesting to see the very same principles in action, but with a different flavor.

---

For me, ever since I boiled down the LOO material as being a basic unit of love and truth, I've always compared religions and dogmas to the LOO, instead of adhering a religion to the LOO.

I have found that adherence to a particular religion has lost its appeal for me. I had already discarded my childhood religion, so there was no longer any involvement for social reasons. I now find that I can participate in the spiritual practices of various religions as an occasional guest, and am better able to see the common thread thru them all. But I have no interest in belonging to any religion. I'm extremely excited to now have other seekers with whom to share and discuss the teachings.

[Bring4th_Steve]

I like how you mention your "childhood religion". :-) It's almost like a "starter marriage".

While this isn't true for everyone, of course, I'm guessing that those who take the time to look at a majority of the positive religions out there will see one common thread: that we are here to find a way to reunite with God, Goddess, Source, Inifinite Creator, Allah, Prime Mover, Krishna, Odin, etc.

But it is wisdom, observation, and/or experience that helps someone see that one religion is no better than another, that each religion is just another color of a rainbow. Because when the colors are overlapped together to make white, all of the parts again equal the whole, and that whole is Love, or the God/Source that was being sought.

It's just difficult to see how many people are still getting caught up in fear-based teachings such that they dedicate themselves to a religion for the sake of not being cast into Hell. That's where I wish we, as a society, could be a little more knowledgeable. Wouldn't we then not have Holy Wars, for example?

But it also wisdom that says, "Hey, the Holy Wars are karmic bonds working themselves out. Just be patient! The days of understanding are nigh."

C'mon, don't you think like that? ..kidding

[Lavazza]

Great thread!

I completely agree that religion is basically just another path to the creator. And I really like Steve's comparison to the rainbow The unfortunate thing about religion though is that it's been manipulated over the years, at least the western religions have. And then you get things like the idea of eternal damnation, intolerance of gays, and all of that. And on the extreme side you have crusades and terrorist acts. But on the whole, I think religion is good for humanity.

I don't think you'll run in to too many people who embrace both religion and the LOO teachings though. Religions tend to like to be the only authority on the spirit. That's not to say that a religious person couldn't act in accordance with the LOO of course, they just wouldn't be aware of it.

[Bring4th_Steve]

Great thread!

I completely agree that religion is basically just another path to the creator. And I really like Steve's comparison to the rainbow The unfortunate thing about religion though is that it's been manipulated over the years, at least the western religions have. And then you get things like the idea of eternal damnation, intolerance of gays, and all of that. And on the extreme side you have crusades and terrorist acts. But on the whole, I think religion is good for humanity.

I don't think you'll run in to too many people who embrace both religion and the LOO teachings though. Religions tend to like to be the only authority on the spirit. That's not to say that a religious person couldn't act in accordance with the LOO of course, they just wouldn't be aware of it.

I love your response.. It really drives home where I was fumbling for words... Thank you!

Steve

[Monica]

I love your response.. It really drives home where I was fumbling for words... Thank you!

Steve

I agree! I think many do polarize via the vehicle of religion...but oftentimes it's despite the rigid doctrine, rather than because of it. The true seeker will eventually use the religion as a catalyst, rather than being restricted by it.

I think it can work both ways...many religions are of mixed polarity...certainly the authoritative doctrines were often rooted in STS attempts to control the masses...so just as some may polarize to STO via religion, others may polarize to STS. And many others stay firmly rooted on the fence, I would surmise.

BTW, I am loving all the responses, from everyone! I'm sort of on a high, just drinking in all these delightful, insightful comments from all these wonderful, loving people!

[Lavazza]

I think you're definitely right on about religion as being a path to either STS or STO, Dreaming. I've seen examples of both. Well, we all have actually! And I'm also really enjoying the discussions here.

[Richard]

I don't consider myself a religious man. I do consider myself a spiritual man. A late come seeker still feeling his way. But the fact that I don't resonate with any of the major mono-theistic religions on this planet doesn't make my path any less valid. Just a bit more personal.

Richard

[Lukman]

I think as I developed, I kept looking for the clearer paths to the One. I was raised as a Catholic, but became agnostic by my mid-teens and stopped attending Mass. For a time in college, I was a Religious Studies major but did not find the search within established religions to be very satisfying. At this time, I also was receiving my own "varieties of religious experience" (as James put it so well), which led me to be opened into Subud. Although one is encouraged in Subud to follow a religions, as a kind of anchor for the heart, the movement itself is based upon surrender to God and receiving individually of the life force. A few years after this, while living in Morocco, I awakened one morning sitting up in bed with my arms raised to the heavens and bathed in light: I knew at that moment that it was right for me to embrace Islam -- which I did.

I should note thaat many Euro-American converts to Islam feel they must adopt the various cultural accouterments that have adhered to the faith over the centuries, but I always felt I had a culture of my own, so just tried to follow the "five pillars."

After 40 years as a muslim and 42 years in Subud, I decided to put both aside. After making these decisions, I came upon the Ra materials and The Wanderer's Handbook. It has been an interesting journey.

This session really delves into the essence of the world's major religions, and why some people are attracted to a certain religion, while others might be attracted to another...and how the Law of One compares and contrasts with the various religions.

I don't see the Law of One as a religion at all, though it is a philosophy which I have chosen as the foundation for my own personal spiritual path.

Recently, a friend (who happens to belong to a Christian) asked me how both could be valid paths...I replied that I think of the various religions as being branches on a tree...but the Law of One being the tree...reaching deep into the Earth and high into the Heavens, in pursuit of Truth.

I am interested in discussing how others integrate the Law of One teachings with their other spiritual practices...do you adhere to a religion? Did you experience conflicts with your religion, or were you able to integrate the LOO teachings seamlessly...perhaps adding fullness of understanding to your chosen spiritual path? Or are the LOO teachings the foundation of your spiritual path?

http://www.llresearch.org/transcripts/is..._1110.aspx

Please see also 2007.11.10. which is related.

[Monica]

Welcome, Lukman!

[Monica]

Regarding the quote; most religious people I've met say exactly the same thing! "I see everyone else as belonging to a branch of the truth, but we're the tree itself, reaching deep into the..." (edited by moderator)

Looks like maybe you thought I was doing the same thing many religious people do: think that my 'religion' is 'the right one.' Please allow me to clarify:

Doctrine and exclusivity are key hallmarks of religion. Doctrine is a set of beliefs that members of that religion are expected to accept. Exclusivity is an identification with that religion and no other; ie., the person can't be both a Hindu and a Christian, or even both a Mormon and a Catholic.

The point to that comment is that the Law of One is not a religion itself but transcends any religion. Religions often make the claim that they are not a religion, but still act like a religion by insisting on adherence to doctrine and demanding exclusivity. The Law of One has no doctrine; nor does it have any exclusivity. Its concepts and philosophies are found in the higher forms of all religions.

Some students of the Law of One do belong to a religion, but use the Law of One principles to add depth to their chosen spiritual path. These people find meaning and fulfillment in their chosen religion, but see the depth in it, rather than being bound by its doctrine.

For example, I have a Christian friend whose depth of understanding of his chosen religion continues to impress and astound me. He has succeeded in finding the LOVE in every facet of his spiritual path. He embodies the principles of the Law of One, even though he has never heard of it. He is undoubtedly a Wanderer, though not aware of it. He is offering a great service to those within his religion, who might never hear of the Law of One otherwise. He offers the principles of the Law of One, even though he calls them by different names that fit within his paradigm.

Another example is Paramahansa Yogananda, who taught the mystical aspects of the Hindu religion in such a profound way as to transcend it as a 'religion.'

But even those who do not explore the deeper intellectual aspects of their religion may still be living the principles of the Law of One, by truly loving their neighbors as themselves, as their teacher said to do.

[Monica]

(I can't remember what got edited out, but it must have been dumb). I see your points Monica, though what I meant was not that I thought you were doing the same thing, just that most strongly religious people I've met all say the same thing, ie., "Ours is the tree, the others are branches". I think spirituality is a different matter, and as you say, many find TLo1 in a way by living the best principles of their religion.

Thanks for the clarification! Actually, I didn't realize that religious people used that analogy. (And here I thought I was being original, ha!) Maybe I heard the expression back when I was a Christian but didn't remember. Oh well.

I do see your point! It's kind of funny, that they would say that, when they think other religions are wrong and theirs is right. The reason the analogy works in the case of the Law of One is that the Law of One is inclusive of religions. If a religion is not inclusive of others, I don't see how they could reasonably use that analogy. Ah, but they do! And they also say that their religion isn't a religion...but then proceed to specify doctrine and dogma.

On a more positive note, I agree that spirituality is entirely different from religion. One might find spirituality via religion, but having a religion does not guarantee spirituality! And, one might have spirituality without religion!

[LsavedSmeD]

However, the seeker becomes aware that this model of life is not accurate—or not fully accurate. Once the seeker has awakened to the knowledge that there is infinitely more than this life and these details of life, the seeker can no longer go back to sleep. Once awake, the journey has begun.

Amazing, another profound quote that will linger within my mind indefinitely.

It is as though the seeker orbits the self, closer and closer, until finally it is drawn into the heart of self by a kind of spiritual gravity. And suddenly there bursts forth an awareness, a satori,[2] a realization, an epiphany.[3] And in that moment the self is known to the self. And that self is love.

And another one.

As for main stream religions they are but a core of truth drowning in a sea of perversions most of which used to manipulate and divide people. (Unfortunately)

There are various ways in which the seeker grows as he seeks ever more deeply for the truth about himself. If the seeker uses the settled religions which we mentioned earlier in an attempt to penetrate the truth of himself and his relation to the Creator, he is forever dependent upon an “other.”

[kylissa]

Wow, there are lots of truly outstanding quotes by Q'uo in this session.. adding onto the list:

"the system of demarcation of human and divine takes its flavor from the male energy of the God-name involved..."

"If the seeker is aware that he is seeking his deepest self, then there is no other, there is only a growing desire to lay aside each mask, each husk, and each trait of personality that veils from him the deepest truth of his nature. "

"There are those among your mystical groups, as well as individuals who do not function as part of a group, who abnegate words and choose the way of silence. Over a period of time the habit of silence decreases the difficulty of absorbing the outrage of paradox. And such silent souls smile at the sophistry of words which separate and logic which delineates and divides to no good purpose, spiritually speaking. Yet we would not encourage you to become recluses. We would encourage you to embrace paradox and mystery. We would encourage you to continue your journey upon the surface of life, knowing that it, too, is perfect in its way, even with all the masks, all the confusions and all the misunderstandings and limitations of dealing with each other and with circumstances which occur in everyday life. For third density was not designed to be a quiet and steady dive to the center of self. It was designed to be turbulent, as the shaker that breaks rocks into pieces or large pieces of ceramic into small pieces of ceramic, polishing them and shaping them by friction and impact. To come at the action intended in third density another way, we could use the figure of the fiery furnace which tempers and strengthens the brittle, callow young soul so that it becomes an instrument of great flexibility and strength."

"the conscious mind, with its rational and logical nature, has a deep distrust and dislike of paradox. And it is certainly paradoxical to say both that the surface self is real and that the deepest and most unitary expression of self is real. Yet that is what we say, knowing that it is a paradox and a mystery."

"all of nature is one with you. And all of nature is full of that information which harmonizes with your desires and sets up patterns of attraction and coincidence. And all of spirit is one with you as well. All that is unseen and not of nature but of spirit conspires to speak with you in silence, singing into your life those silent melodies of truth and beauty."

[ubergud]

Wow, there are lots of truly outstanding quotes by Q'uo in this session.. adding onto the list:

"the system of demarcation of human and divine takes its flavor from the male energy of the God-name involved..."

"If the seeker is aware that he is seeking his deepest self, then there is no other, there is only a growing desire to lay aside each mask, each husk, and each trait of personality that veils from him the deepest truth of his nature. "

"There are those among your mystical groups, as well as individuals who do not function as part of a group, who abnegate words and choose the way of silence. Over a period of time the habit of silence decreases the difficulty of absorbing the outrage of paradox. And such silent souls smile at the sophistry of words which separate and logic which delineates and divides to no good purpose, spiritually speaking. Yet we would not encourage you to become recluses. We would encourage you to embrace paradox and mystery. We would encourage you to continue your journey upon the surface of life, knowing that it, too, is perfect in its way, even with all the masks, all the confusions and all the misunderstandings and limitations of dealing with each other and with circumstances which occur in everyday life. For third density was not designed to be a quiet and steady dive to the center of self. It was designed to be turbulent, as the shaker that breaks rocks into pieces or large pieces of ceramic into small pieces of ceramic, polishing them and shaping them by friction and impact. To come at the action intended in third density another way, we could use the figure of the fiery furnace which tempers and strengthens the brittle, callow young soul so that it becomes an instrument of great flexibility and strength."

"the conscious mind, with its rational and logical nature, has a deep distrust and dislike of paradox. And it is certainly paradoxical to say both that the surface self is real and that the deepest and most unitary expression of self is real. Yet that is what we say, knowing that it is a paradox and a mystery."

"all of nature is one with you. And all of nature is full of that information which harmonizes with your desires and sets up patterns of attraction and coincidence. And all of spirit is one with you as well. All that is unseen and not of nature but of spirit conspires to speak with you in silence, singing into your life those silent melodies of truth and beauty."

I like these ... they embrace the mystery while giving comfort. The 'conscious mind with its rational and logical nature' is most interesting to me, as it appears to be the source of the 'struggle' when trying to understand the mystery or the reason for it.

[StormShadow]

I experienced almost no conflicts - but then, of course, I had already abdicated the Christian church by eleven and found Cayce by thirteen. Going to church was like being hungry in a grocery store and knowing they have good stuff in the back but finding only day-old bread on the shelves.

I've spent most of my life looking for the "good stuff" that I knew was out there somewhere, and have found it, incrementally. Still finding it. Frustratingly, also incrementally.

The biggest mystery to me was always why nobody else seemed to be hungry like me. Quite happy with the Wonder Bread. Never understood that.

[litllady]

All religions are a path...but to stop at just one, limits a person, to a degree.

For me, the LOO gave me a totally different look at the Bible. I found the OT god image to not be god at all. I also though found deep understanding for why the NT teaches to know the difference between ways of flesh and of spirit. Know the difference between service to self (ways of flesh ) and service to others (ways of spirit). The LOO allowed me to look with reason into the Bible, instead of just accepting it. Once I did this, I could see God in certain places and in other places I saw ways of man.

The ones seeking an Earthly Temple for God are the ones that are not seeking with the spirit. But it is a marker for them, that there is still things to learn from this sphere for them. Its not wrong or right....it is just a marker, showing what one understands.

The LOO also allowed me to find God in all religions, as well as find ways of man in all religions. I now have no need for a label for my faith, and my spiritual birth right has been given back to me. For this, I am thankful. The LOO helped me move away from the fear that my childhood religion placed in me. This was not easy and took a couple years to sift out of. All the while I was not alone...I always was given comfort through this transition. Instead of having comfort from other humans I began receiving comfort from my higher self and the Holy Spirit. Its nothing less then magnificent and miraculous.

I still study the Bible very much, I use it to determine two different natures. I use it to learn the nature of man and the nature of the Holy Spirit.

[Questioner]

I see a discrepancy: the first post is credited to Monica, but this quote cites DreamingPeace. Is the post originally by DP and Monica moved it to another forum on the site? If so, is it a bug in the software that Monica is then shown as the author? Or is the cite wrong and Monica is the author of the thread-starting post?

I have just never run into anyone who is a devout [name your religion], but also a scholor or enthusiast of the LOO principles.

Wouldn't Carla count, as a devout metaphysical Christian and, certainly, a scholar and enthusiast of the Law of One?

This excerpt from the channeling session:

We have spoken many times about this journey inward. We have spoken about that surface of life that is consensus reality which, rather than being earth, has more of the quality of the ocean, liquid, penetrable, deep, and capable of being entered by the diver who dives deep, perhaps to gather pearls from the ocean’s floor and to bring up those precious pearls to store away in the treasure house.

reminded me of this poetic description of primal therapy and depth psychology. Q'uo started with wholeness, this author with brokenness, but they seem to me to arrive at a similar place. I apologize for the long excerpt but I really don't see a way to summarize without losing the message.

When we dip below the waves of everyday life and begin to open ourselves to the feelings and sensations which are being broadcast to us, in a roundabout way from a distressed brain, we enter a very unusual world. What is it like and how do we move around in this place?

The world of mind has a freedom we can never achieve in daily life. Within, it is as though we are suspended in three-dimensional space like a scuba diver suspended between the bottom and the surface. Unlike the diver, however, we can move in any direction without having to use our arms and legs. We move simply by taking thought and shifting ourselves as though we were a subject in a fantasy. We can move toward, or away from, inner things. We can go deeper or shallower or, if we wish, leave the water entirely.

We can examine inner objects and processes with our senses and our intuition in the same way we would if we were attending to an external world event.

We are alive to that which we encounter within us, in the same way that we are to what is outside us. We can be guided by the same responses. We are, however, infinitely more mobile, moving slowly, or if we wish, moving like lightning. We can even sit up and open our eyes during a therapy experience and thereby disengage from our inner world. ....
Unlike the outer world, we cannot always rely on the inner world remaining solid and separate from us. It is here in this issue that we may be overwhelmed and unable to control what is happening. We have the age-old knowledge of our race that something in the depths of our mind might move beyond our control, thus making us mortally afraid. What we are observing in the inner world (a dream image for instance) might suddenly come toward us and overwhelm our ability to stay separate from it.

Thus human beings fear loss of control as much as they fear anything. We are afraid that we may be overtaken by a feeling which is so large that we will have to act on it ....

I believe, however, that serious breakdown can be avoided by following the cautions that have already been and will be outlined.

Once we have submerged from the surface of our daytime self, we find ourselves suspended in our three-dimensional world. We encounter the communications we have spoken of earlier. SPECIFIC BODY SENSATIONS like spikes of coral brush against us. DIFFUSE INNER BODY STATES come and go like dark shadows around us. Feelings make themselves known like layers of water at different temperatures. Images move beside us like aquatic creatures, and IMAGE SEQUENCES pass before our eyes like schools of fish.

The difference between the undersea world of the self and the undersea world of the ocean is, of course, that everything we see in the undersea world of the self has been projected into it from within the depth of our own mind. This is a symbolic world and because it comes from deep within us, it all has meaning for us. We feel the puzzlement and the tidal pull of these potential meanings, and we know we are in a place which will speak to us if only we can learn how to listen.

With our undersea senses, we can open ourselves to become aware of our inner distress. We feel the ache in our neck, we sense the diffuse upset and nausea in our bowel. We become aware of the constriction in our chest a dark, inner, pain-radiating landscape becomes visible around us.

If we are, for instance, submerged within the sea of our inner world, and once there we feel an unusually powerful fear of criticism, this exaggerated concern is a fear which does not have real existence in the world. We have projected it from our deeper self into the sea around us where we can now move toward it, or withdraw from it.

http://www.paulvereshack.com/helpme/chapt16.html

The book continues with a discussion of merging with pain as a painful but necessary process, which results in peaceful enlightenment.

The author of this psychology material is a controversial figure within primal therapy, which is a controversial area of psychology, itself a controversial field! Therefore readers may want to use more caution than usual if exploring this point of view. (I think a broader balanced perspective on primal therapy comes from some other sites on the subject.) Nevertheless, isn't this discussion of depth psychology curiously related to the meditative world view presented by Q'uo?

[Monica]

I see a discrepancy: the first post is credited to Monica, but this quote cites DreamingPeace.

DreamingPeace was my username before I was invited to become a moderator. Sorry for the confusion!

Wouldn't Carla count, as a devout metaphysical Christian and, certainly, a scholar and enthusiast of the Law of One?

I think she definitely would count!

And, I know of others who are religious and students of the Law of One, even though they've never read the books. Let's remember that the Law of One is not the books. The Law of One is just described in the books.

---

I found the OT god image to not be god at all. ... The LOO allowed me to look with reason into the Bible, instead of just accepting it. Once I did this, I could see God in certain places and in other places I saw ways of man.

I had a similar experience. I had already concluded, before I ever read the Law of One, that the Bible was not what I had been taught. If anything, the true 'test' was to be able to discern which elements of the Bible were 'of God' and which were not.

I felt a bit nervous about what I was thinking, due to the programming of my upbringing (to never question the Bible). Reading the Law of One helped validate what I had already concluded.

The LOO also allowed me to find God in all religions, as well as find ways of man in all religions.

Yes, me too!

The LOO helped me move away from the fear that my childhood religion placed in me.

Me too!

All the while I was not alone...I always was given comfort through this transition.

You are blessed! I felt alone during part of this time, which I understand now was part of the process in my case.

Instead of having comfort from other humans I began receiving comfort from my higher self and the Holy Spirit. Its nothing less then magnificent and miraculous.

AMEN!!!

[litllady]

Hello Monica!

I do recall the feeling of being 'alone' during my journey. It didnt last long, a sifting of a few weeks mabey. But I can relate, I did have a time of feeling very alone. It was needed, for I had to know that my path was true, and not for the gratification from others I was seeking. It was similar to being tested on something, I had to understand why I felt alone, before I discovered that I was not alone at all. I had to be willing to continue, for the will of spiritual things, and not for the will of others around me. So like you said, this alone time had its purpose, and showed its purpose to me eventually.

I can remember, my favorite confident, my mother, not supporting my path. As great of changes it was bringing me and inspiring me deep within, like a new love does to ones heart, I was saddened for a while, I wasnt receiving encouragements from the person I always had. I became very distant fro conversations with my friends and family about things that would of been normal for me to join in on. On the outside, I was trying to blend in with the norm, but on the inside, I had great changes going on, and my brain was bending different ways in every moment of every action and thought I had. Oh but all of this led to the most awesome times and experiences for me. How can I tell anyone I know the angels of the Earth are so real and love us? I can clearly remember, a day where I was deeply praying and seeking, I had been on this journey of seeking by myself for some while, knowing, God knows, I am sifting alot of thoughts, I am trying to cleanse my heart and mind so Thee knows my intent is true....and I surrendered my final feeling of it all to God. Once I did this, with a true meaningful heart, comfort swept over me like a warm blanket in the cold winter would, the knowing that I was not alone at all, but was being given the space I needed, helped me stand tall again in claiming my right to go with my gut and what I felt right. The best words to describe such a knowing is as if God was smiling at me, or the Universe itself, was smiling at me, saying 'its ok child...all is well'.

I remember the comfort more then the alone feeling, but I do remember it very well also. Its ironic how things work out I would go as far to say that I felt God walking with me that next couple of days after I surrendered my every thought to Thee. I quickly forgot about my 'alone' feeling, like it never was.

Thankful to have others to share and talk with about such things