dealing with guilt and shame

[Plenum]

it seems quite interesting that Ra does NOT use the word guilt or shame at all in their communications. Maybe those words are just too loaded for us.

there are a couple of extant threads on these 2 topics:

on guilt: http://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=1354
on shame: http://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=1383

but in terms of balancing, both Guilt and Shame seem to be 2 big areas. Actually, maybe they are just 2 different manifestations of the one root phenomena; that of not being good enough, or doing something wrong, or breaking some sort of moral or spiritual code.

both seem like instruments of self-attack; a way of diminishing the self in relation to others. It's a form of comparing, and finding that you yourself are not up to scratch.

the insidious thing is that it becomes a self-imposed torture chamber.

- -

I have some repressed memories of shoplifting when I was very young. I was caught twice, and the guilt somehow became detached from the circumstance, and became a thing in itself. I can see how it has been present as a 'monster' in my consciousness for most of my life; because I never dealt honestly with the originating event.

there is a lot of inner work to make peace with this guilt force.

[Brittany]

It is quite possible to disassociate from your emotions to the degree that they split off and gain their own form of sentience. In some severe cases this can manifest in things like Dissociative Identity Disorder, or even in poltergeist activity. I think the most common form of this phenomenon, though, especially for sensitives and active spiritual seekers, is simply a rain cloud of nasty feelings that seem to come from nowhere and follow the person around- an ominous presence leering out at you from the closet.

I went through a quite acute version of this experience, in which I detached a deep, burning self-hatred from my consciousness, causing it to manifest in the form of a very aggressive, malevolent presence. On good days there were general feelings of unease and paranoia. On bad days I would feel intense hatred being directed from what seemed like a vortex of evil within my house. On several occasions scratches and bruises appeared on my body and at some of the worst points it was enough to drive me to suicidal behavior.

Of course, I was firmly convinced there was some evil entity haunting my home, attempting to pull me from the light. The moment my eyes were finally opened to the fact that this wretched creature was ME was one of the most crushing moments of my life. The GUILT and SHAME were so great that I was filled with the samurai instinct to slice open my own gut in the face of losing all I found honorable. Not only did I have to contend with the fact that all of these "horrible" manifestations were of my own creation, but I was also faced with the responsibility of a thought form I had given life to out of sheer misery. I withered under the stare of my own hatred, facing a part of myself devoid of mercy or compassion, cut off from the loving energy of the heart.

As we shift into a new era of consciousness these sort of instances are becoming a lot more pronounced. I know numerous individuals who have created their own personal monsters in a very literal sense. We are beginning to become awakened to the power that lies within each of us, yet at this point most of us are like children playing with daddy's loaded gun. We have no idea what we are capable of doing. I would go so far as to say that 99.999999% of "psychic attacks" are self-inflicted, and the other small percentage are brought about by very obvious holes torn in the aura by emotional turmoil within the self.

The good news is that these situations can be resolved in a relatively quick and painless manner. My integration process was long and painful because I had no idea what I was doing, but after completing it I have been able to guide others to a much smoother reunion with detached parts of themselves. All one has to do is stare in the mirror and see that Self which has been cast away. Stare into your own eyes and call them forward and believe me they will come, for the self ever seeks to be reunited with itself.

The way to re-integrate, and to deal with feelings of guilt in general, is to stare at that feeling, that manifestation, in complete and humble honestly. Acknowledge it for all that it is, and let any and all corresponding emotions flow through you as a tide. Don't attempt to grab onto the waves or hold them back. Just let them pass through. If you feel guilty, angry, hurt, etc., let yourself experience those feelings in their fullness. Stare into the eyes of the part of yourself that is hurting, and once the storm has blown through, allow the gentle light of the Creator to fill that gap and mend those wounds. Reach out to yourself in a loving embrace and accept all that you are. Welcome that part of yourself back as it is cleansed in the light of forgiveness. It is an act of ultimate humility and surrender. There is no forcing, only allowing. Simply allow yourself to be, and allow the everlasting Love to be a balm over the wounds that have been created.

Within the past few months my life has done a complete 180, due entirely to the realization of how the projection phenomenon works and how that which is projected may be unified once more. Never before have I felt so full and content. Yes, the process can be painful. Facing parts of the self that have been buried for years is never easy, but the only one who can deny you forgiveness is yourself. The rest of creation is waiting with bated breath to let you onto the bus.

[Monica]

Flower remedies are excellent for this. They are very powerful. Very inexpensive and can be purchased at any health food store. Taking flower remedies is like having the mud wiped from one's eyes. Suddenly, one's outlook is different. They can also bring suppressed emotions to the surface where they can be healed. An excellent book (that can help determine which remedies to use) is Advanced Bach Flower Therapy: A Scientific Approach to Diagnosis and Treatment by Götz Blome

---

It is quite possible to disassociate from your emotions to the degree that they split off and gain their own form of sentience. In some severe cases this can manifest in things like Dissociative Identity Disorder, or even in poltergeist activity. I think the most common form of this phenomenon, though, especially for sensitives and active spiritual seekers, is simply a rain cloud of nasty feelings that seem to come from nowhere and follow the person around- an ominous presence leering out at you from the closet.

I went through a quite acute version of this experience, in which I detached a deep, burning self-hatred from my consciousness, causing it to manifest in the form of a very aggressive, malevolent presence. On good days there were general feelings of unease and paranoia. On bad days I would feel intense hatred being directed from what seemed like a vortex of evil within my house. On several occasions scratches and bruises appeared on my body and at some of the worst points it was enough to drive me to suicidal behavior.

Of course, I was firmly convinced there was some evil entity haunting my home, attempting to pull me from the light. The moment my eyes were finally opened to the fact that this wretched creature was ME was one of the most crushing moments of my life. The GUILT and SHAME were so great that I was filled with the samurai instinct to slice open my own gut in the face of losing all I found honorable. Not only did I have to contend with the fact that all of these "horrible" manifestations were of my own creation, but I was also faced with the responsibility of a thought form I had given life to out of sheer misery. I withered under the stare of my own hatred, facing a part of myself devoid of mercy or compassion, cut off from the loving energy of the heart.

As we shift into a new era of consciousness these sort of instances are becoming a lot more pronounced. I know numerous individuals who have created their own personal monsters in a very literal sense. We are beginning to become awakened to the power that lies within each of us, yet at this point most of us are like children playing with daddy's loaded gun. We have no idea what we are capable of doing. I would go so far as to say that 99.999999% of "psychic attacks" are self-inflicted, and the other small percentage are brought about by very obvious holes torn in the aura by emotional turmoil within the self.

The good news is that these situations can be resolved in a relatively quick and painless manner. My integration process was long and painful because I had no idea what I was doing, but after completing it I have been able to guide others to a much smoother reunion with detached parts of themselves. All one has to do is stare in the mirror and see that Self which has been cast away. Stare into your own eyes and call them forward and believe me they will come, for the self ever seeks to be reunited with itself.

The way to re-integrate, and to deal with feelings of guilt in general, is to stare at that feeling, that manifestation, in complete and humble honestly. Acknowledge it for all that it is, and let any and all corresponding emotions flow through you as a tide. Don't attempt to grab onto the waves or hold them back. Just let them pass through. If you feel guilty, angry, hurt, etc., let yourself experience those feelings in their fullness. Stare into the eyes of the part of yourself that is hurting, and once the storm has blown through, allow the gentle light of the Creator to fill that gap and mend those wounds. Reach out to yourself in a loving embrace and accept all that you are. Welcome that part of yourself back as it is cleansed in the light of forgiveness. It is an act of ultimate humility and surrender. There is no forcing, only allowing. Simply allow yourself to be, and allow the everlasting Love to be a balm over the wounds that have been created.

Within the past few months my life has done a complete 180, due entirely to the realization of how the projection phenomenon works and how that which is projected may be unified once more. Never before have I felt so full and content. Yes, the process can be painful. Facing parts of the self that have been buried for years is never easy, but the only one who can deny you forgiveness is yourself. The rest of creation is waiting with bated breath to let you onto the bus.

Wow, what an intensely deep and personal, and profound, post, ahktu! Thank you for sharing!

Your experience reminds me of a book I read to my son when he was a pre-teen. It's 'young adult' fiction but OMG it is DEEP! It is about the very thing you just described. A powerfully written book, for anyone of any age.

A Wizard of Earthsea (The Earthsea Cycle, Book 1) by Ursula K. Le Guin
(we got it at the library)

[RonAl]

Well said ahktu

[kdsii]

Aaron always has good insight into emotions and relationships.
Here's a good scenario, and the insight into it:

(Questioner) Q: You talk about the sanctity of all life. I was driving and accidentally killed a squirrel. How serious is this? I feel very guilty.

(Aaron) A: What does this experience teach you? Was your mind completely on your driving? Would you have been paying closer attention? Guilt is a negative emotion; it will not help you learn. Open your heart to life’s lessons compassionately and without judgment. Learn what you need to learn. And thank this small being for its great gift. It has given its life to teach you something important. Perhaps this gift of love was its life’s purpose. Thank it with all your heart, and send it your love.

it seems quite interesting that Ra does NOT use the word guilt or shame at all in their communications. Maybe those words are just too loaded for us.

there are a couple of extant threads on these 2 topics:

on guilt: http://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=1354
on shame: http://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=1383

but in terms of balancing, both Guilt and Shame seem to be 2 big areas. Actually, maybe they are just 2 different manifestations of the one root phenomena; that of not being good enough, or doing something wrong, or breaking some sort of moral or spiritual code.

both seem like instruments of self-attack; a way of diminishing the self in relation to others. It's a form of comparing, and finding that you yourself are not up to scratch.

the insidious thing is that it becomes a self-imposed torture chamber.

- -

I have some repressed memories of shoplifting when I was very young. I was caught twice, and the guilt somehow became detached from the circumstance, and became a thing in itself. I can see how it has been present as a 'monster' in my consciousness for most of my life; because I never dealt honestly with the originating event.

there is a lot of inner work to make peace with this guilt force.

[Plenum]

thanks for the thoughts everyone; it has helped me much



love to aktu, Monica, kd

[BrownEye]

I was a thief when I was younger. I have no shame about it. I was simply a product of my environment. My shame comes from that which molded those morals growing up. Fellow humans.

[AnthroHeart]

I deal with guilt over one particular event in my life. I acted out of anger and hurt a dog that was growling at me. It's hard to get over, because of how irresponsible I acted. At times I forgive myself, but then later it comes back and I'm in the guilt phase again. I wish I could forgive myself for good. The dog has died since (not from what I did), but I still carry this guilt.

[Ankh]

I deal with guilt over one particular event in my life. I acted out of anger and hurt a dog that was growling at me. It's hard to get over, because of how irresponsible I acted. At times I forgive myself, but then later it comes back and I'm in the guilt phase again. I wish I could forgive myself for good. The dog has died since (not from what I did), but I still carry this guilt.

I think that most of us have done stuff in the past that we are not proud of, and that we have real difficulties to forgive ourselves for. When that comes up in my memories, I like to think of following quote:

The entity was absolved karmically of the destruction of an other-self when it was in its last portion of lifetime and spoke upon what you would call a cross saying, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” In forgiveness lies the stoppage of the wheel of action, or what you call karma.

It seems like those men, those people who were killing Jesus, really didn't know what they were doing. And so it happens to most of us perhaps. That we sometimes do stupid, stupid things that we can't forgive ourselves for, and that we later really can't understand how we were possibly ever been able to do anything like what we did.

*Not* in the light of our new consciousness, but back then - we really didn't know what we were doing, cause if we would, we wouldn't be doing that, right?

Forgive yourself, Wolf. You didn't know what you were doing at that time.

[Brittany]

Perhaps it is the dog you should call forth in the mirror, then. The dog is a part of you and is available for healing and forgiveness anytime you wish it. You simply need to ask.

[Monica]

Perhaps it is the dog you should call forth in the mirror, then. The dog is a part of you and is available for healing and forgiveness anytime you wish it. You simply need to ask.

Ahktu is right! If you picture that dog in your mind and talk to him/her, and tell him/her that you're sorry and ask for forgiveness, I predict the dog will smile and wag his/her tail!

[GreatSpirit]

My most shameful moments. When I was around 13 or 14, I was at my friends house and squeezed the dogs snout until it yelled. I don't know why the hell I did it. It didn't do anything to me but just some morbid curiosity overpowered me at that moment. When I would watch my nephew as a teen and he would act up, I would slap him a few times. A couple years ago I would play real rough with my ex g/f's dog and made it yell because it always messed with my cat.

[Meerie]

I deal with guilt over one particular event in my life. I acted out of anger and hurt a dog that was growling at me. It's hard to get over, because of how irresponsible I acted. At times I forgive myself, but then later it comes back and I'm in the guilt phase again. I wish I could forgive myself for good. The dog has died since (not from what I did), but I still carry this guilt.

I bet the dog has long forgiven you...
it is interesting you mention that, I also had these episodes of recurring guilt. Although I have forgiven myself but it was coming back.
Wonder where that stems from? is it our ego trying to sabotage us?
by insisting on these past issues? and thus reinforcing our feelings of unworthiness?

[Plenum]

I just had an interesting insight into Shame this evening.

Shame seems to operate primarily on the function of comparing; comparing oneself to others, or an idealised version of the self. It is usually yellow-ray related; as the sphere of comparison comes into play at work, or at school, or in some social setting. One 'compares' oneself (it is usually a practice learnt from outside, and then internalised), and then finds oneself wanting in some characteristic or another. It could be anything. Shame just looks for a weakness or deficit in the self compared to others.

Shame tends to have had a more welcoming home in Asian cultures; as opposed to guilt, which is usually more western-oriented; but these are gross generalisations, and may not hold as readily given our global culture these days.

The balancing of Shame seems to involve a recognition of the UNIQUENESS of the self, and hence no comparisons to others need be made at all. It fact, when this acknowledgement is internalised, there is a seeing that comparisons with Others are totally invalid; as each is approaching life with a unique history, a unique set of skills, and a unique life plan. Comparisons are invidious, and ultimately dividing.

that is not to say we cannot use feedback; but comparing one to another is like comparing earth to pluto; there is no need to do it whatsoever.

[kanonathena]

An idea is to wait for the moment when you can see it objectively crystallized, then acknowledge it as a beautiful expression, then accept it as beauty.

[Aureus]

An idea is to wait for the moment when you can see it objectively crystallized, then acknowledge it as a beautiful expression, then accept it as beauty.

Precisely. The reason you feel guilt is because you don't agree with a particular action of the past. You have outgrown the mindset that manifested the action you now feel guilty for.

If you can recognize that this growth has happened, you'll realize that your identity has changed, the old has been shed. Then it is easy to forgive the person that did it, and feel proud for your own evolution..

Try to recognize this.