01-20-2012, 02:38 AM
A year ago I was diagnosed schizophrenic. At that time, I was believing I was in 4D already, and was being my true self such as walking outdoors naked. It seemed very comfotable for me, thinking I was a anthro in transformation, just waiting for my fur to grow.
As such I realized that my schizo had relative levels of intensity, that could come in waves. At certain levels, there becomes a degree of emotional intensity, and scale. For instance a sense of wonder could be focused in to narrow wonder, or expanded into expanded wonder. Expanded would then be more timeless. Perhaps the most expansive positive emotion would be rapture. While the most expansive negative would be despair.
NOw, the Risperdal med I'm givin pretty much block out all sensory input from 3rd eye. Another, Cogentin tones down the anxiety and hyperemotional states.
However I have found that when varying from these dosages, moving in small incriments, one can find a perfect pattern that gives them the best balance of the schizo/wisdom energies, and the hyper/emotional attachments. These emotional attachments are what one tends to freak out about. THey make the stories we tell ourselves have more immediate feedback to us. While the schizo/wisdom more manages how far into the infinite sky we wish to journey. So emtional state must be kept in balance with the journey of wisdom.
For example, lets' say I'm watching something on tv with others in the room. I make a comment, did you see that? and they respond in the negative. We're seeing the same show as them, but through different perception filters. We can watch the same scene 3 times or more and each time see a different series.
We could then put in a program that says, show me this scene with regard to the topic of sexuality. Then the movie will play again, and each character is still there, though doing their own thing to answer the question about how they can answer your sexuality through their story.
So there's a lot of possible wisdom to be gained when one's 3rd eye is opened, but not too much, and keeping emotional balance. So I use Risperdal to control the speed of this car experience, and Cogentin to balance my emotional freakout levels. So that we have the maximum ability of use of universal wisdom while staying sane.
Once I saw on an internet ad this dragon character in costume. He appeared to exhibit higher density movements. They were fluid. He fell to the ground. Did not just drop, but floated down, oscillating his head back and forth as he rested his fangs into the floor. This was in front of a crowd of thousands at a gaming event, which noone else seemed to notice. This was my specific catalyst. Had I had the Cogentin, it would have balanced my hyperemotional state so I wouldn't have been scared of it like I was, and I could have instead enjoyed seeing an anthro doing neat stuff.
If I can find a balance between the Risperdal, Cogentin, and sometimes Ambien when I need it, I can stay grounded even when My mind is beginning to open universal wisdom.
Just a little guidance on how to find your perfect balance of your spiritual gifts, so that they don't overwhelm you.
In my hyperemotional state, it was perfectly possible to have something be too cute and too adorable that I couldn't handle it.
I saw fantastic cute characters etched into a brick wall, and then moved around as they came to show me my own personal archetypes.
we have to be in a rather narrow window of awareness to see things like these. I saw how cute counterbalances strangeness, and in this state I worked with Ra to keep myself balanced. As I went up through subdensities, I had to be at the right place. Too low density and my body got cold. To high density it was too hot.
I will post more later here as I garner more experiences.
By far the best so far was watching YouTube videos that did not exist outside of the subdensity/timeline I was at. So when I tried to post one of those wisdom vids to this board, it just came out as a white box. So I might have to type some transcripts from the videos.
Instead of closing myself down, I'm taking responsibility for reaching a perfect balance that allows me to reach out into the sky, while staying grounded, and integrate these experieneces.
As such I realized that my schizo had relative levels of intensity, that could come in waves. At certain levels, there becomes a degree of emotional intensity, and scale. For instance a sense of wonder could be focused in to narrow wonder, or expanded into expanded wonder. Expanded would then be more timeless. Perhaps the most expansive positive emotion would be rapture. While the most expansive negative would be despair.
NOw, the Risperdal med I'm givin pretty much block out all sensory input from 3rd eye. Another, Cogentin tones down the anxiety and hyperemotional states.
However I have found that when varying from these dosages, moving in small incriments, one can find a perfect pattern that gives them the best balance of the schizo/wisdom energies, and the hyper/emotional attachments. These emotional attachments are what one tends to freak out about. THey make the stories we tell ourselves have more immediate feedback to us. While the schizo/wisdom more manages how far into the infinite sky we wish to journey. So emtional state must be kept in balance with the journey of wisdom.
For example, lets' say I'm watching something on tv with others in the room. I make a comment, did you see that? and they respond in the negative. We're seeing the same show as them, but through different perception filters. We can watch the same scene 3 times or more and each time see a different series.
We could then put in a program that says, show me this scene with regard to the topic of sexuality. Then the movie will play again, and each character is still there, though doing their own thing to answer the question about how they can answer your sexuality through their story.
So there's a lot of possible wisdom to be gained when one's 3rd eye is opened, but not too much, and keeping emotional balance. So I use Risperdal to control the speed of this car experience, and Cogentin to balance my emotional freakout levels. So that we have the maximum ability of use of universal wisdom while staying sane.
Once I saw on an internet ad this dragon character in costume. He appeared to exhibit higher density movements. They were fluid. He fell to the ground. Did not just drop, but floated down, oscillating his head back and forth as he rested his fangs into the floor. This was in front of a crowd of thousands at a gaming event, which noone else seemed to notice. This was my specific catalyst. Had I had the Cogentin, it would have balanced my hyperemotional state so I wouldn't have been scared of it like I was, and I could have instead enjoyed seeing an anthro doing neat stuff.
If I can find a balance between the Risperdal, Cogentin, and sometimes Ambien when I need it, I can stay grounded even when My mind is beginning to open universal wisdom.
Just a little guidance on how to find your perfect balance of your spiritual gifts, so that they don't overwhelm you.
In my hyperemotional state, it was perfectly possible to have something be too cute and too adorable that I couldn't handle it.
I saw fantastic cute characters etched into a brick wall, and then moved around as they came to show me my own personal archetypes.
we have to be in a rather narrow window of awareness to see things like these. I saw how cute counterbalances strangeness, and in this state I worked with Ra to keep myself balanced. As I went up through subdensities, I had to be at the right place. Too low density and my body got cold. To high density it was too hot.
I will post more later here as I garner more experiences.
By far the best so far was watching YouTube videos that did not exist outside of the subdensity/timeline I was at. So when I tried to post one of those wisdom vids to this board, it just came out as a white box. So I might have to type some transcripts from the videos.
Instead of closing myself down, I'm taking responsibility for reaching a perfect balance that allows me to reach out into the sky, while staying grounded, and integrate these experieneces.
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