My Awakening. Or Grand Delusion. You Choose.

[Tenet Nosce]

This will be my own wanderer awakening post. I came across the Ra material in 1994/1995, and identified myself as a 5D wanderer based upon the information provided by L/L, and especially the below quote from the material:

The fifth-density Wanderer is one who is not tremendously affected by the stimulus of the various rays of other-self and in its own way offers itself when a need is seen. Such entities are not likely to engage in the, shall we say, custom of your peoples called marriage and are very likely to feel an aversion to childbearing and child-raising due to the awareness of the impropriety of the planetary vibrations relative to the harmonious vibrations of the density of light.

Ever since I identified myself as a wanderer, my life has been a series of intense seeking as to the proper way to deal with this information. Including, but not limited to, deeply questioning if IN FACT I am a wanderer... or if I am deluding myself into thinking so out of some unresolved ego issue. Also, of course, deeply seeking as to what forms of service would be appropriate for one such as myself.

I was initially surprised by the amount of negativity that was directed at me in other forums, for simply wanting to discuss that I might be a wanderer. Some seemed extremely offended that I would identify as such, and to the point where I was made to feel that it was "wrong" or even "dangerous" for a wanderer to "come out" as such.

My observations:

Some people seem to be very upset that even the concept of wanderers was introduced in the material. There seems to be this idea that the very concept of wanderers is divisive, because it is causing seekers to question whether or not they themselves are wanderers.

Some people seem to think that the worst possible thing a seeker could do is identify themselves as a wanderer as it would be the epitome of self-aggrandizement.

Some people with self-esteem issues seem to be triggered to the max anytime the word "wanderer" gets thrown into the mix. I can only guess that they are envious of wanderers because their self-esteem issues prevent them from seeing that they may be a wanderer themselves.

Some people are mostly quiet on wanderers- but come out of the woodworks dancing with delight whenever the concept is forwarded that wanderers must soon die and leave this world. Apparently in their view, wanderers are the problem, and need to be "eliminated".

Many years have gone by. The seeking remains.

And also the negativity remains. Sadly, I have observed some of the same patterns emerging in my interactions with people on this forum. And this despite that, up until this point, I have been very careful to not publicly speculate on my own wanderer-hood. This is extremely tiring, and needs to stop if only for my own benefit.

Therefore, I want to know: How do people REALLY feel about wanderers? Let's get this all out in the open. Now is the time to move past this. Here is the opportunity. Let me have it.

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

[Meerie]

Thanks TN for citing that quote about 5D wanderers, that makes a lot of sense to me! What session was that from? did they talk more about 5D wanderers specifically?
Ah and by the way welcome to the forum! enjoy your stay here . No one on b4th will judge you for being a wanderer, rest assured!
Something else that struck me... you call this thread "my awakening". But you write mostly about others people, speculating about their motives or their negativity vis-a-vis you.
What does that say about you? why do you feel you are being met with negativity by others?
What does it have to do with you?

[Ankh]

Thank you for sharing, TN. You've been here for a little while, but since you are posting your Wanderer story now - welcome (I guess)
I don't mind people calling themselves Wanderers, natives Gaians, incarnated Guardians etc etc. I enjoy reading about these beliefs, that people sometimes dare to share.
Personally I like the word traveller, and I don't find any strangeness in the fact that graduated souls decide to travel later in their development to different parts of this or others Logo.

[Namaste]

I agree, those questions may be better in a discussion thread, rather than your awakening story (finding the Ra Material in 1995)...

Any more to share? :¬)

[Tenet Nosce]

Thanks TN for citing that quote about 5D wanderers, that makes a lot of sense to me! What session was that from? did they talk more about 5D wanderers specifically?

The specific question is 32.9. Here is a link to a search for "wanderer fifth".

Ah and by the way welcome to the forum! enjoy your stay here .

Thanks!

No one on b4th will judge you for being a wanderer, rest assured!

This runs contrary to my experience, but thanks for the reassurance.

Something else that struck me... you call this thread "my awakening". But you write mostly about others people, speculating about their motives or their negativity vis-a-vis you.

You are perceptive... it is my awakening to being a wanderer because this has become a central focus in my life, bearing upon both my past and my future, relative to that nexus. Simultaneously, there was a sense of relief in knowing I wasn't crazy and I wasn't alone... but no sooner did I attempt to reach out to connect with others like myself than I was met with negativity over making such an identification.

What does that say about you? why do you feel you are being met with negativity by others?What does it have to do with you?

Yes, there is a recurring theme. But having a tendency toward verbosity, I figured that writing out an entire autobiography might be an obstacle for the reader.

What does that say about me? That I have a deep natural sense of seeing others as a reflection of myself, and relative difficulty seeing myself in others. This may stem from previous polarization on the STS path... but I am not entirely sure.

why do you feel you are being met with negativity by others? Well I somewhat covered this in the post. I don't really understand why. I just observe that is the case. I have always been extremely bright and talented. Up until I started school this was a "good" thing. Once I hit school, I realized how envious and jealous the other kids became of me.

I truly wasn't trying to flaunt anything in their face... just simply be myself. And so life has gone from there. Apparently, simply being myself pisses people off and activates their self-esteem issues. And this is bullshit, and I am tired of it.

So sorry I am a genius- go f^(& yourself. That's how I feel sometimes. Insert "wanderer" for "genius" and now you see how this pattern plays out in this specific case.

What does it have to do with you? It has everything to do with me because it would appear that "being me" is "wrong" according to the views of many others. We teach in our society to "do your best" but when somebody's "best" passes too far outside the "normal" range, then we turn on them as rabid dogs.

And it is hurtful. It tells a person that society really doesn't want their light. They find the light obtrusive and uncomfortable, and they would much prefer that the light be put under a bushel, or extinguished completely. This is a serious problem.

So here we have a planet of beings who call and call and call for assistance. But when the assistance arrives, they spit in their face and fold their arms and drag their heels. This is disheartening.

But maybe you have some suggestions, Meerie. What do you see?

---

I agree, those questions may be better in a discussion thread, rather than your awakening story (finding the Ra Material in 1995)...

Thanks, Namaste. But perhaps you don't realize that this comment results in me thinking... WOW! I can't even write my own awakening story without somebody coming in and telling me that I am doing it the "wrong" way.

But I don't think that was your intention. So perhaps you could tell me what was your intention?

Any more to share? :¬)

What do you suppose would be helpful?

[Meerie]

Really has someone on b4th suggested something negative about being a wanderer? or judged you for it? That would really surprise me because I guess everyone registered here is a wanderer. Why else would you one be drawn to the material in the first place?
the other thing that comes to mind, and what was behind my asking "what has this to do with you?" was
"what you put out is what you get back".
Could not it be that seeing that negativity in others means you have to adress the negativity in yourself?
others usually act as a mirror for ourselves. Especially if it is a recurring theme as you say, it means there is a lesson in it as well.
I noticed in another thread you said something like you had made these discoveries and others had nothing better to do than butt right in and not acknowledge them, probably because they were jealous (pardon me I do not really know how you exactly worded it, something along these lines).
I mean, maybe you see more "negativity" beneath others reactions than there actually is? For example if someone contradicts you, couldn't it simply mean they do not share your opinion? but that does not really mean that YOUR opinion is not valid. And it does not mean either that they do not respect you. It just means they happen to come to different conclusions than you.
thanks for mentioning the exact Ra session, by the way. Will check it out.

[βαθμιαίος]

But maybe you have some suggestions, Meerie. What do you see?

I'm not Meerie, but I do have a suggestion, which is to pick one or several people that you admire and try to emulate them. For instance, Albert Schweitzer seems like he had his sh*t together:

This entity spent much green ray energy both as a healer and as a lover of your instrument known as the organ. This entity’s yellow ray was bright and crystallized by the efforts needed to procure the funds to promulgate its efforts. However, the green and blue rays were of a toweringly brilliant nature as well. The higher levels, as you may call them, being activated, the lower, as you may call them, energy points remain, in a balanced being, quite, quite bright.

(Note, I copied and pasted from the relistened version because of a slight change in the final sentence.)

The people don't, of course, have to be wanderers, discussed in the Ra material, or well-known in any way.

[Ankh]

By the way:

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

What people? Why? What do you mean?

[Tenet Nosce]

By the way:

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

What people? Why? What do you mean?

1. I am a 5D wanderer.
2. All 5D wanders have 3D bodies.
3. No 5D wanderers have 3D/4D hybrid bodies.
4. Harvest is immanent.
5. At harvest, all entities in 3D bodies will experience physical death.
6. Post-harvest no entities will be on the planet in 3D bodies.
7. Therefore: In the very near future, harvest will occur, and upon harvest I will die.

8. "What people" refers to those who accept the above (1-6) as true, and (7) as a logically deduced conclusion drawn from the above.

[Namaste]

5. At harvest, all entities in 3D bodies will experience physical death.

The Ra Material does not state death follows instantly. I think there is a Q'uote mentioning lives are lived to a natural end. Also, Ra was talking in the context of those with dual activated bodies, in which if you are of fifth density, would rule you out from the termination of the 3D vehicle process (whatever that may be).

Read form here.

Thanks, Namaste. But perhaps you don't realize that this comment results in me thinking... WOW! I can't even write my own awakening story without somebody coming in and telling me that I am doing it the "wrong" way.

But I don't think that was your intention. So perhaps you could tell me what was your intention?

Nothing to take personally, it just seems more like an open discussion rather than a personal story. A post of two parts; the Wanderer Awakening aspect, and an invite for open discussion. The former being rather limited. Most people here can cite a date and the Ra Material :¬)

Any more to share? :¬)

What do you suppose would be helpful?

Your story of awakening, perhaps? :¬)

It was a friendly invite, by no means meant to offend, my apologies if I have done so.

[Tenet Nosce]

Really has someone on b4th suggested something negative about being a wanderer?

To my awareness, not overtly. I am referring to subjective cues, the nature of which, being subjective, does allow the possibility for my perception to be entirely a fabrication of my own mind.

Allow me to recapitulate my experiences here on Bring4th.

I had known about this forum for quite some time, but had never really felt drawn to it for whatever reason.

Although I am not recalling the specific reason (pesky veil) why- I had been contemplating harvest and trying to formulate where exactly in my mind the problems with fully accepting it as real.

My first post here was in May 2010, approximately 15 years after completion of my initial reading of the Law of One:

Thread: Post-harvest continuity of consciousness
Post: Post-harvest continuity of consciousness
I'm new to this forum but not new to Law of One. After many years of research, I find myself coming back to the same fundamental question: How does it actually work? I will briefly summarize what...
Tenet Nosce The Harvest 52 2,792 05-28-2010, 12:34 P

Upon some discussion and further contemplation of harvest I identified a second big blind spot in terms of my understanding as regarded the actual dynamics of harvest with respect to population. And so I started a second thread to specifically discuss this issue:

Thread: Harvest: Do The Math
Post: Harvest: Do The Math
Facts From CIA Handbook: Current world population: About 7 billion Current death rate: About 60 million per year Hypothesis: By the end of 2012, all people who will not graduate to 4D will no longe...
Tenet Nosce The Harvest 286 8,211 06-02-2010, 05:39 PM

After about another week or so of discussion, I was still not completely content with any of the ideas offered. Also, I noticed that only a few people happened to be interested in discussing these at the time. This somewhat surprises me- and so here I can identify where I felt a little disappointed as a result of having a false expectation as to how others perceived my views.

If you scroll through the beginnings of those threads, you will see certain dynamics begin to unfold which perhaps may shed some light on the origins of my perceptions of others with respect to this forum.

Some days later, I had been pondering much on how the Ra contact actually got initiated. As I also have been reading "Matthew's Messages" there had been a recent one from Hatonn which caused me to wonder about Hatonn's contact with L/L, and if indeed it was the same Hatonn. This led me to wonder what went on in the last sessions with Hatonn before Ra appeared, and realized I had never really looked at the last sessions with Hatonn before Ra came in. I started a third thread documenting my thoughts:

Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before...
This is interesting. I have never before looked back at the last few sessions leading up to the initial Ra contact. Here Hatonn announces that they have plans to use radio, and maybe television, to ...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 43 3,454 06-02-2010, 06:44 PM

Then I conceived of an idea: I wondered what would happen if I "removed myself" from the thread for a period of one year in order to see how they develop on their own with no input from me. And so I did exactly that.

In anticipation of my return in June 2011, my mind was naturally again on the material, however I wasn't even fully conscious of this. For "some reason" I felt drawn back to Bring4th. Only after I had been back did I remember about the idea to purposely leave. So there is a great example of how the veil works, I might add.

Here you see I have come back to "harvest" the fruits of my threads:

Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: RE: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Be...
First off... I hadn't realized there was new activity on this thread. So my apologies for dropping my own thread. So here's an interesting development, from the latest "Matthew's Message". Quote:7....

Notice at this point, I had not yet gone back to my first two threads. Only this third one.

Instead, I started looking around at other threads that looked interesting and drew my attention.

The first was unity100's thread in the Advanced Studies section. Although as you see my first reply is not to unity100, but to abridgetoofar. I think this is significant and you can see how some confusion unfolded:

Thread: Guardians from the Octave above
Post: RE: Guardians from the Octave above
(06-17-2011 03:22 PM)abridgetoofar Wrote: Per request, Ra's quote on the Guardians' role in Harvest: Quote:The third group watching over this process is that group you call the Guardians. This...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 151 2,078 06-21-2011, 04:49 PM


The second was 3DMonkey's post about Patton. Again, you can see that my first reply was to Bring4th_Aaron not 3DMonkey.:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(06-26-2011 09:26 PM)Bring4th_Aaron Wrote: Couldn't a being be incredibly positively polarized, but not harvestable if they "sat on" their potential, not doing anything with the increased abili...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 06-28-2011, 11:44 AM


Then the "Big Blowout" occurred. Honestly this was a complete surprise to me. I thought I was simply offering a view which I thought was reasonable. Nothing at all to spark such controversy. Now if you go back and view the carnage, you will see what I am talking about. See what happened?

Where did all this negativity come from? Me? Honestly I don't think so, but maybe I am still in denial.

This caused me to deeply seek for greater truth, in order to more completely express my views. In my mind, this was not only being of service to myself, but also to others. Which is how I tend to think all the time. How can I serve the highest good of all, including myself.

Almost exactly 24 hours later, I received the inspiration:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
***NOTE*** My use of the word "you" in this post is not referring to anybody in particular, so please don't take it personally. 3DMonkey Wrote:We are getting closer to the issue here. This sounds l...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 06-29-2011, 11:56 AM

This drew direct praise from both Bring4th_Monica and 111. Two things to point out here.

First- this is what caused me to click on their profiles and notice that I could go back and easily look at their posts. This eventually led me to the idea of looking at their very first post, which will become important later on.

Second- if you follow the thread from there, perhaps you will see where I got the notion that other members were reacting negatively to the public praise I had received from Bring4th_Monica and 111.

So hopefully you can see here how this directly triggered the above personal issue I have been referring to.

I was trying to help. I was trying to do a good thing. I got some inspiration. Shared it with others.

And STILL there was a negative reaction because I got praised for what I did. I was not looking for the praise. Thank you very much, but I do not require strangers on a web forum looking out to make sure my "ego" doesn't get too inflated. Do you see?

Again, maybe I am projecting all of this. But I don't think so, and I will get into why shortly.

Getting back to the praise... this is when I looked to see what Bring4th_Monica was up to in the forum, and this is what drew me to the vegetarian thread.

Now, it "just so happened" that I had been working on a HUGE personal research project at this time with regard to the origins of religions beliefs, and finding the correct historical context for all of these things. This included, of course, trying to figure out how the Ra contacts fit into all of this.

For this reason, I had just done deep research into these personages: Zoroaster, Mahavira, Siddharta Gautama, Laozi, Confucious, and Pythagoras. Among other things, I was comparing their beliefs about meat eating and vegetarianism, trying to figure out the origins. Keeping this context in mind, here is where I came into the vegetarian thread:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Vegetarianism, as a philosophical construct, is based on the doctrine of ahimsa, or nonviolence toward living things. This concept was originally born in India circa the first millennium BC, and was ...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,070 07-07-2011, 01:26 AM

Yet again, you can see that I was not replying to Bring4th_Monica. I was actually replying to yossarian WAY back in the beginning of the thread. However, if you look back at the thread you can see how Bring4th_Monica could have easily taken it that way. Although I quickly caught what happened, the confusion had already happened and a maelstrom ensued.

It takes approximately 3 days to apparently resolve this second blowout, and here you see my peace offering:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
I will interpret your 4:20 post as a peace offering. RE: zealotry. I mean that in the sense of taking an absolutist stance on a philosophical principle by declaring something to be inherentl...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,073 07-10-2011, 04:47 PM

The next day I go back to More Positive But Less Harvestable and you will see an interesting exchange between unity100 and I. In the background, things between he and I began to get heated regarding whether or not every word in the material was literally true:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(06-29-2011 11:23 AM)unity100 Wrote: i think it was 5d wars that were being fought with light and thought. Ah. So I am a 5D warrior then!
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 07-10-2011, 10:41 PM

Interested to know more about unity100's views, I clicked on his profile and found another interesting thread. Here is my entry into that thread. And actually you can see how it directly ties back to this same issue of wanderers. However, yet again, notice that my reply is not to unity100, but to βαθμιαίος:

Thread: Guardians of the quarantine doesnt seem infallible
Post: RE: Guardians of the quarantine doesnt seem infall...
(07-11-2011 03:40 PM)βαθμιαίος Wrote: The question we've been dancing around is why would Ra say that wanderers are here, in part, to polarize? My understanding is that polarization equates to ...
Tenet Nosce Advanced Studies 189 1,491 07-11-2011, 07:10 PM

This exchange causes me to go back and look at Session One. This is where I notice the [tape gets flipped] part, and where for the first time I made the observation that Ra offered to speak more on the Law of One, but Don said no, tell us about the earth changes.

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Here it is right here in Session One. I went back to look and it was staring me right in the face. Quoteoes this form a sufficient amount of information, or could we speak further? Is there anothe...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 07-11-2011, 11:36 PM

Again, I share my eureka moment. Again, I get some very positive feedback. And again some folks appear to have a negative reaction to my realization, and arguing against what I was trying to say, or completely ignoring it.

Again- I did not understand why there was so much resistance to my post. And again- I still do not see how all the negativity was sourced within myself. And again- I am willing to accept the possibility that I completely projected this onto others. And again- I do not think this is actually the case.

Next up is when unity100 replies to some of the ideas I had been tossing out, and appearing to get increasingly irritated because he felt I was making grand conclusions based on false premises. To me, I was just "putting stuff out there" in order to better learn where my understanding was incomplete. I wasn't forwarding this as a "grand theory of everything". And unity100 did point out some very important things I was overlooking.

However, we still appear to be at an impasse over Ra getting the dates wrong in the material. And this impasse eventually became the seed for later maelstrom.

Meanwhile, I became equally curious as to what happened in the first session after the last Ra contact. I document my thoughts here:

Thread: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
Post: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
I would like to now discuss this session, presumably the first one after Don's suicide. There are two distinct parts to the session. In the first Carla is channeling Hatonn: Hatonn Wrote:I greet you...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 13 1,107 07-12-2011, 02:46 AM

Yet again, I receive some public praise. This time from 3DMonkey. And yet again, you can see how this was followed by negatively oriented posts from others.

Although I will point out that I apparently made an error in my understanding that Don had just committed suicide before this session. It was later pointed out that this was not the case. I have yet to fully reevaluate my thoughts in this thread, as continuing drama in other threads continues to unfold.

You can see where again I decided to hit the "pause" button and remove myself from the thread:

Thread: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
Post: RE: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
(07-12-2011 11:43 AM)unity100 Wrote: No, my friend no. Indeed. OK so here is what I am going to do. I am going to refrain from commenting on this thread for a minimum of ten (10) days. I would...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 13 1,107 07-12-2011, 01:47 PM

I go back to More Positive but Less Harvestable and continue discussion. Also right about this time I was going through some sort of quickening. Synchronicities were flying all about. Not the least of which were time ones. I documented this observation here:

Thread: Numbers! Numbers! Time! Time!
Post: Numbers! Numbers! Time! Time!
What is up with this stuff, anyway? 07-10-2011, 11:07 PM (This post was last modified: 07-11-2011 11:11 PM by Tenet Nosce.) Post: #65 07-11-2011, 01:23 AM (This post was last modified: ...
Tenet Nosce Olio 21 442 07-13-2011, 05:39 PM

Meanwhile, we happen to also be in the midst of a "juice revolution" and so I thought in consideration of the blowout over meat eating, maybe I would put myself in a juicer's shoes for a few days:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Just got a juicer! YUM!
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-13-2011, 08:10 PM

We continue to have some discussion in More Positive But Less Harvestable, but somehow the streams get crossed after I made a comment about vegan zealots, and yet ANOTHER explosion happens between me and Bring4th_Monica.

At this point I am like, WTF? Why do these blowouts keep happening over and over again? Am I causing them? Is it me? What is going on here?

This when I got the idea to actually make a mental list of all the forum members who were involved in the "Big Blowout" and go back and see what was their very first post on Bring4th.

The idea being... maybe if I could (A) "Go back in time" and make peace with all of these people by responding kindly to their original posts, and (B) understand more deeply the reason each of these people were brought to the forum, then © maybe I could help this from continuing to occur, and (D) learn something about myself in the process.

This goes on for a period of three days, as I continue to post in other threads, but leave More Positive But Less Harvestable alone. Finally, I reemerge in the thread, and make a post concurring with 3DMonkey:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(07-12-2011 01:06 AM)Tenet Nosce Wrote: (07-12-2011 12:19 AM)3DMonkey Wrote: No, we get it Ra. ....Moving on to more important things.... 'retrospective oops' Bingo! Through no fault o...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,771 07-18-2011, 05:25 PM

Another two days pass, and seejay21 rejoins the thread:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Hi, seejay21. Thanks for rejoining the thread! (07-20-2011 04:49 AM)seejay21 Wrote: My interjection into this thread is to discourage from seeking answers about specific people, and thier ori...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,771 07-20-2011, 02:15 PM

Now thinking that the "knot has been untied" in the thread, I free myself to poke about in other threads. I also continue my studies into the Ra material, and specifically begin to start wondering about why, exactly, there are certain sticking points, and the possibility that Ra actually made some mistakes in the material

I had previously made some comments in different threads about my observations in Session One, specifically with respect to how the query limits the reply, but there wasn't much of a response. This is when I come into the lenticular thread:

Thread: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular galaxy when our galaxy is spiral?
Post: RE: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular gala...
WHAT?! Could this possibly mean that Ra is not infallible? Or perhaps that limitations in the Questioner's mind could distort the communication toward greater confusion? Wild!
Tenet Nosce Science & Technology 38 1,061 07-21-2011, 09:16 AM

unity100 gets irritated with my post and makes an attempt to "call me out" on my supposed "hidden agenda". I am thinking to myself... WOW after all that hard work and positive intention I am yet again being accused of having negative intentions, when I, in fact, do not.

More days pass, and David Wilcock posts on his website about uncovered documents relating channelings of Hatonn during the fifties in SE Michigan. I also learn that there is some connection to L/L Research. This is -very interesting- to me because I have always felt personally connected to the material.

I grew up in SE Michigan, and I keep getting this intuition that my grandfather, Leonard, may have been involved with this group back in the 50's. Interestingly, he died of a sudden stroke in 1984, shortly after the Ra contact ended. I still don't know if there is anything to this. But it seems to confirm what I have been sensing this whole time:


Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: RE: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Be...
Some new information just released by David Wilcock. This document contains several transmissions from Hatonn, and a few from Latwii, to a group operating in the SE Michigan area during the 50's and e...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 43 3,454 07-23-2011, 11:44 AM


I also continue to investigate more deeply into Don's suicide. This is specifically interesting to me because of previous experiences with negative entities, one of which influenced a friend to believe that I was spearheading a conspiracy among our friends to have him committed to a mental institution. This has always struck me as oddly similar. Anyway, I continue to delve a bit in the tribute to Don Elkin's thread... but find that I must tread lightly and that some of my views are yet again appearing to irritate others:

Thread: An appreciation of 'Outlier' Don Elkins
Post: RE: An appreciation of 'Outlier' Don Elkins
(07-16-2011 05:39 PM)kycahi Wrote: Back in my college days, I often attended weekly meditation meetings at friends, Hal and Jo. Hal was the one who first introduced Don to that particular kind ...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 42 2,087 07-23-2011, 11:53 AM

This is also when I do a google search for "Don Elkins suicide" and find some interesting information relating to David Wilcock, and Laura Knight-Jadczyk. As you can see... Google puts these two individual's websites at the top of the list.

Reading Laura's views on "Ra and wanderers" as well as Don's suicide- I begin to realize that some (not all) of the ideas closely mimicked things I had been tossing around in my own mind. It just seemed too bizarre to be "coincidence". I began to read the C's channelings and Laura's "The Wave" series:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Now here is another bizarre "coincidence"! I don't really follow the Cassiopean channeled messages to any considerable degree. However, seeing as how I had just quoted them in another thread I thoug...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-24-2011, 01:19 AM

This all acts as catalyst for me to more deeply consider the role of wanderers in earth's history. Including my own. I might add at this nexus that simultaneous to all of this going on, I seem to have uncovered evidence of a past life.

Whether or not it was "me" a major theme of this person's life was: writing books in order to help uplift humanity, later trying to redact some of his words due to some new awareness he had come upon, but having others twist his words into their opposite, and used as a catalyst for some very destructive things.

I will leave it at that for now. Notice how the theme ties into, not only my experience here in this forum, but the Ra material itself, and indeed Ra's experiences on earth with the unintended consequences of actions taken in thought of service to others.

Thread: 6th-Density Negatively Polarized Wanderers?
Post: RE: 6th-Density Negatively Polarized Wanderers?
It seems to me that whenever a 6D Wanderer gets involved in earthly affairs in a public way, their efforts eventually become turned to the exact opposite of their intention. Especially so when it come...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 78 1,833 07-24-2011, 11:31 AM

Meanwhile, things get whipped up yet again in More Positive But Less Harvestable, and I find myself having to defend myself to others:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
When I come across seemingly conflicting information, my natural instinct is that investigation into the discrepancy will yield a higher level of understanding. While this may not be fruitful in all c...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,773 07-26-2011, 03:06 PM


And also, things get whipped up yet again in the meat thread:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Alrighty, then. Despite the other valid points raised in this thread, I do not see one iota of evidence from the Ra material to support a vegetarian lifestyle. In fact, I see quite the opposite: Quote...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-26-2011, 07:22 PM

By now about a week has past, and I get back to responding to unity100's attempt to call me out, thinking that I have found a more balanced perspective. Yet my attempt at peacemaking yet again seems to fall somewhat flat.

Thread: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular galaxy when our galaxy is spiral?
Post: RE: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular gala...
(07-22-2011 03:48 PM)unity100 Wrote: lets get to the bottom of this - you have a beef with some information in the material, and you need Ra to be fallible in order for that information not to ...
Tenet Nosce Science & Technology 38 1,061 07-27-2011, 11:36 PM

Next I respond to @ndy's post about allergies and raw food, and yet again confusion ensues with Bring4th_Monica. I am like... really? I thought we already settled this... twice.

What the hell is going on here? Why can't I get a post off in this forum without somebody getting all bent out of shape? Do you see?

This is when I began to suspect manipulation behind the scenes by negative entities. It was the only explanation that gave everybody, including myself, the benefit of the doubt.

Now... Happy Birthday to me! It is noontime on my 34th birthday and what am I thinking about? Gee... I really need some more wisdom in order to help clear these negative entities out of my life. They seem to be wreaking havoc!


Thread: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Post: RE: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
(07-04-2011 05:39 AM)Nyu Wrote: I can't just quit my job though, I have a family to support. Sure you can! Nyu, you are a being of limitless potential. Perhaps it would not be ideal to simpl...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 79 1,422 07-29-2011, 12:09 AM

Meanwhile, I realized I still had to resolve the issue in the raw food and allergies thread with Bring4th_Monica. So I decided I would "speak my peace" and be done with it... so I could carry on and enjoy my day.

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: Raw food and oral allergy syndrome
(07-29-2011 11:21 AM)Bring4th_Monica Wrote: Exactly what I was thinking. Sounds like there's some prejudice entering the conversation. There was no need to bring up fanaticism or what some peop...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-29-2011, 01:12 PM

Immediately after this post I experienced- what I perceived to be- a negative attack, as I documented the next day here:

Thread: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Post: RE: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Yesterday, shortly after my post on the Raw food and oral allergy syndrome which has since been moved to In regards to eating meat (post at 1:12 pm) I experienced what could have been a 5D attack. I a...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 79 1,422 07-30-2011, 03:54 PM


I'm sorry this took forever... but you did ask for it!

At this point let me be completely clear: I know that I played a part in all of this drama ensuing. I know I was not completely innocent. I know I can be an ass at times, and throw out some inflammatory comments. And I am sorry, and seek forgiveness.

What I did realize is that one way I was contributing to the confusion was by not clearly delineating where I was directly responding to somebody in particular, and when I was responding to a post in general.

Since this realization, I have taken great pains to me more clear about this. And indeed, this reply is not only to you, but should be taken as part of my "awakening story"... to be continued.

My "awakening" is now.

But, to now answer your question directly. No. It is not "all about me". And the above post explains why.

I am not trying to "blame" anyone... merely hold up the mirror of myself for others to see.

Oh and I just realized something else I should point out. Often times my posts are a "real-time" documentation of an idea or thought as I receive it. Not a recapitulation of a theory I had previously concocted.

Secondly, I go back and edit my posts after I get the general gist down. This typically takes about one hour time- so I would recommend not replying to my posts until after one hour.

Keep that in mind.

[Raman]

By the way:

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

What people? Why? What do you mean?

You know, deep down it does not matter if harvest is in 2011 or not. However, it is a helpful catalyst for some. I cannot confirm or deny that anything will occur but what if if does. What if there is a nuclear war instead? That would be the equivalent in terms of death and fear for some, although the planet probably would not survive. My interest in the harvest as a rather fulminant event occurred shortly after I read the material and was quite a shock to absorb. Then I realized that a nuclear war would be much worse and there were some serious possibilities (see my very first post under "Crimson').

The most important thing is how one reacts to the catalyst. Looking at card IV, 'The Experience of the Mind' if you look at the cat ( on the right side ) it is said to represent the protection of the positive path regardless of any circumstance then 'all interpretation may be seen to be protected by light'.

You did not reveal anything new to me (Or Im sure to many that do not even post) and actually it seems more important than it is. I'm still blown away that unity100 did not grasp <that> meaning previously, since he was one of the few that was looking closer (or due to his visibility for the length and number of posts) to the concept of harvest (as the one occurring at the end of the 3d cycle).

I recommend to meditate on any karmic issues, and above all look at what the cat is protecting in card #4. If harvest occurs as a quick death event it is just part of the "Evolution". If not, hopefully nothing close to a nuclear demise will occur in the near future and after 2011, it would be possible to stat a true new world. However, I still maintain the view of a rapid event per the evidence as I understand it.

More comments around that issue are pretty much moot.

I will now cease to post under 'Raman' as the events that lead me to post under that name has been resolved.

[Tenet Nosce]

Read form here.

Thanks for this.

Your story of awakening, perhaps? :¬)

This is it.

It was a friendly invite, by no means meant to offend, my apologies if I have done so.

No offense taken. I was just attempting to document the very process of confusion I am talking about in real-time as I read your post.

The issue here being... you have pure intent... but despite your intent your words may have been taken negatively by me. They were not, but it could have been so.

[Tenet Nosce]

70.15 Questioner: I think that to clear up this point I will ask a few questions that are related that will possibly help me to understand this better because I am really confused about this and I think it is a very important point in understanding the creation and the Creator in general, you might say. If a Wanderer of fourth, fifth, or sixth-density dies from this third-density state in which we presently find ourselves, does he then find himself in the third-density time/space after death?

Ra: I am Ra. This will depend upon the plan which has been approved by the Council of Nine. Some Wanderers offer themselves for but one incarnation while others offer themselves for varying lengths of your time up to and including the last two cycles of 25,000 years. If the agreed-upon mission is completed the Wanderer’s mind/body/spirit complex will go to the home vibration.


Interesting. That says: If the agreed-upon mission is completed then the Wanderer's mind/body/spirit complex will go to the home vibration. Do we take that to mean... the whole thing?

[unity100]

You know, deep down it does not matter if harvest is in 2011 or not. However, it is a helpful catalyst for some.

it is an instant separator of weed from the chaff on the path of spirituality both among people in general, and inside one's own persona in regard to his/her inner desires and thoughts.

a lot of people take on spirituality as 'something on the side' and claim to be in seeking. most of these people, we dont see putting much into practice. only what is convenient. its like a sub-culture of sorts for most, and some take some emotional support from it and be able to accept some of their distortions and so on. even if that is something good its not an actual seeking.

when it comes to stuff that disturbs their comforts in any way, things change instantly. reinterpretations start flying around, denial comes in, and sometimes comes even rejection of the information/sources they have been claiming to trust and have relied upon in the past.

see, up to this point Ra material was something that totally could stay abstract, and hazy and distant for almost all of such people. 'all is one' and then everything was ok. most of the stuff was philosophical, abstract enough. and harvest was something that was vague and distant in future.

but now that distant future is not distant anymore. the very thing which cannot be abstracted, relegated into vagueness of subconscious and indefiniteness of future or philosophy is basically upon them.

this is disturbing. and it is a point which will determine whether there was a real seeking or not, or was it just a hobby or a side-interest. it is similar to a wooden plank hitting one in the face, and things 'getting real' for the first time. even a serious attack by a negative entity has undertones and linkages with one's own subconscious and biases and distortions (since these are exploited) and it can easily remain as a vague 'subconscious' thing that does not directly shatter the perceived reality of this societal mind and its orange/yellow perceptions, so remain non-disruptive of the 'real' life these people were living.

but harvest being 'next month' etc is something totally different than this. its not 'imminent' anymore, its now. at this crossroads a lot of things get into confusion for the psyche of the entity. ranging from its trust in the validity of the material and the given date to the perception of reality of the material - 'what if nothing happens' 'what if it happens as a vague event', 'what if nothing changes' - to the desires and wants the entity has regarding the reality it is currently living in - 'i wanted to be successful in x', 'my career ?!?', 'i want to play more computer games', 'i wanted to get married' to rightful/wrongful worries about the loved ones or entities the person identifies with - 'what will happen to my family member/close person xyz', 'my cat', 'all these people' and many more.

something (spiritual information and seeking) that could be 'pursued' without disrupting 'normal life' on the side suddenly becomes something with a real impact.

some entities get stuck at that point, some entities choose to move forward at all costs.

You did not reveal anything new to me (Or Im sure to many that do not even post) and actually it seems more important than it is. I'm still blown away that unity100 did not grasp <that> meaning previously, since he was one of the few that was looking closer (or due to his visibility for the length and number of posts) to the concept of harvest (as the one occurring at the end of the 3d cycle).

i study on things as i live them. therefore things i concentrate on change with the period i am at at any given point. back in 1996 i reminisced on the 2011 date and said 'that is 15 years later. that is a long time. what i am going to do until then' and i dismissed it. there was nothing could be done regarding that date or concepts surrounding it that moment. i have gone through and worked on other stuff.

but it is now 2011. that time has come. and my attention is also turned towards the harvest event. i got what i could get from these discussions. i was already looking at the events progress around, in lives of people, behaviors and what was going on around the world and what was happening to me, however, seeing something was imminent.

[Tenet Nosce]

Although you indicated you will not further be posting, I thought I would reply anyway in case you return as Crimson or with a new name, and because I think your post is interesting.

What if there is a nuclear war instead?

I've noticed that you have spoken of this possibility before, and responded here:

RE: Guardians of the quarantine doesnt seem infallible

(07-13-2011 07:33 PM) This game is getting on the side of stupidity. If continue like this why don't we just blow up planets everywhere and end creation once and for all..

What the hell is your point again?

Of course not!! Why would we want to end creation? Would that even be possible??

Raman, what I think some folks are attempting to get at is that the reason we choose not to enslave others, or kill them, is because we recognize ourselves in them. This is love.

We don't need to invoke "wickedness" or "righteousness" in order to coexist in peace, love, joy and harmony.

Isn't that great news! A load off of your shoulders? Whew! You're not here to save the universe, and you do not need to be saved from it. You put the bogeyman in the closet, remember?

Peace on earth, goodwill toward men. (And women) (And cats and chickens too)

This above posting of mine occurred in between your comments in 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra:

What the hell is your point again?

Sorry...Tenet Nosce...That was quite rude of me.

But by that time I had already said I was going to avoid the thread for ten days. So my apologies for not accepting your apology.

As I earlier related:

Although I will point out that I apparently made an error in my understanding that Don had just committed suicide before this session. It was later pointed out that this was not the case. I have yet to fully reevaluate my thoughts in this thread, as continuing drama in other threads continues to unfold.

Now looking back for the first time in detail at unity100's reply, I can see how the negative emotions I was experiencing prohibited me from understanding what he was saying. But I will get back to that later... or not such as the case may be.

Then I realized that a nuclear war would be much worse and there were some serious possibilities (see my very first post under "Crimson').

I will go and look, although as I was reviewing your initial posts as Raman I noticed you went back and deleted some. I hope all is well with you. Also, I noticed that Bring4th_Monica and unity100 were the first to offer you kind words. Had I seen these posts previous to my re-entry in June I may have been less inclined to get caught up in events with them later.

The most important thing is how one reacts to the catalyst. Looking at card IV, 'The Experience of the Mind' if you look at the cat ( on the right side ) it is said to represent the protection of the positive path regardless of any circumstance then 'all interpretation may be seen to be protected by light'.

Thank you. I will ponder on this and offer this link for a search on "Experience of the Mind".http://www.lawofone.info/results.php?sea...&ss=1&sc=1

Also, thanks to βαθμιαίος to correcting all of the "... of the Mind" errors in the relistened version. This had previously been a huge stumbling block for me with the material.

You did not reveal anything new to me (Or Im sure to many that do not even post) and actually it seems more important than it is.

Revelations are relative to the beholder. I am attempting to offer my experiences as catalyst, and in doing so create a more refined and distilled experience of myself. It means everything and nothing all at once.

I recommend to meditate on any karmic issues, and above all look at what the cat is protecting in card #4.

I am sorry... but I seem unable to determine what that cat is protecting. Maybe another can help me out here.

However, I still maintain the view of a rapid event per the evidence as I understand it.

This has been my understanding all along, and hasn't changed although has been refined. Sometimes I have been getting the impression that some observed that I "jumped ship" and crossed over to the "gradual" side, which is not the case. Or maybe that is just another idea I have been projecting onto others. Who can say?

My specific course of study here since my return has been to track down the source of confusion about this in the material. I have all along anticipated this source to be both simultaneously within and without.

More comments around that issue are pretty much moot.

While looking back over your posts as Raman, one word did keeping jumping out at me. That word was: Joy.

I will now cease to post under 'Raman' as the events that lead me to post under that name has been resolved.

I trust that the resolution of the events has served the highest good of all involved.

[Ankh]

By the way:

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

What people? Why? What do you mean?

1. I am a 5D wanderer.
2. All 5D wanders have 3D bodies.
3. No 5D wanderers have 3D/4D hybrid bodies.
4. Harvest is immanent.
5. At harvest, all entities in 3D bodies will experience physical death.
6. Post-harvest no entities will be on the planet in 3D bodies.
7. Therefore: In the very near future, harvest will occur, and upon harvest I will die.

8. "What people" refers to those who accept the above (1-6) as true, and (7) as a logically deduced conclusion drawn from the above.

What is your direct understanding of your above post? That when Harvest occurs you will immediately die? And that this will happen in a very near future? (I am sorry for asking this question if you've already answered it in another thread.)

[Tenet Nosce]

By the way:

According to some, I will be dead soon. So this might be your last chance.

What people? Why? What do you mean?

1. I am a 5D wanderer.
2. All 5D wanders have 3D bodies.
3. No 5D wanderers have 3D/4D hybrid bodies.
4. Harvest is immanent.
5. At harvest, all entities in 3D bodies will experience physical death.
6. Post-harvest no entities will be on the planet in 3D bodies.
7. Therefore: In the very near future, harvest will occur, and upon harvest I will die.

8. "What people" refers to those who accept the above (1-6) as true, and (7) as a logically deduced conclusion drawn from the above.

What is your direct understanding of your above post? That when Harvest occurs you will immediately die? And that this will happen in a very near future? (I am sorry for asking this question if you've already answered it in another thread.)

As of this moment, this is my current understanding:

When harvest occurs, I will be able to make contact with intelligent infinity. I am assuming at the very least, since I am consciously familiar with harvest, that I will notice when it occurs. Obviously, at such a moment my next thought would be to contact intelligent infinity.

Contact with intelligent infinity is mostly beyond description... however I think I can reasonably assume that it involves access to massive amounts of information as if one has direct access to an oracle. Naturally curious about what I would further assume to be upcoming death, I would inquire as to what options there are and/or be offered some choice. Whatever the case, the information required would be provided.

That I must "die" as in leave this sphere upon harvest is part of the question. According to my understanding of the material the answer to this question is "yes".

Is this immediate? I am not sure. I was previously proposing an anomalous period of approximately one year, simultaneous with harvest, in which a wanderer might be able to persist in this sphere, should they choose.

The quote I just above found while ostensible looking for something else actually says that if a wanderer completes their mission their mind/body/spirit complex will return to the home density. My understanding of the material tells me that this current body I am typing with is part of the mind/body/spirit complex. And as such I am attempting to grapple with how this might be possible.

I am also coming to understand that, in addition to the light available upon harvest, there will be limitless love available upon harvest. Both internal sources, and those emanating from others. As well as in the form of those "harvesters" and "guardians" who have full understanding of the process and how confusing it can be for sub-sub-logoi.

So I can only assume that they know what they are doing.

This understanding is still in process, and incomplete.

[Namaste]

70.15 Questioner: I think that to clear up this point I will ask a few questions that are related that will possibly help me to understand this better because I am really confused about this and I think it is a very important point in understanding the creation and the Creator in general, you might say. If a Wanderer of fourth, fifth, or sixth-density dies from this third-density state in which we presently find ourselves, does he then find himself in the third-density time/space after death?

Ra: I am Ra. This will depend upon the plan which has been approved by the Council of Nine. Some Wanderers offer themselves for but one incarnation while others offer themselves for varying lengths of your time up to and including the last two cycles of 25,000 years. If the agreed-upon mission is completed the Wanderer’s mind/body/spirit complex will go to the home vibration.

Interesting. That says: If the agreed-upon mission is completed then the Wanderer's mind/body/spirit complex will go to the home vibration. Do we take that to mean... the whole thing?

I have always assumed so.

In terms of completing the agreement, I believe this references the timescales in which each Wanderer decided upon, hence the reference to the durations of incarnations.

[Ankh]

Thank you, Tenet, for your answer. I see that you put lot of efforts in attempting to understand the concept of Harvest. What I reacted at was your choice of words "I will be dead soon". How "soon" will be soon, in your current understanding, my brother? 1-2 years?

[yossarian]

Anytime anyone says or does anything there are others who are going to react in a seemingly "negative" way. They will disagree or push back. It doesn't mean either party is doing something wrong.

Tenet Nosce, I read all your posts here and went back and read some of the threads you linked to try and get a good idea of what you're going through.

My verdict: learn to accept the drama, the froth, the whipped-up-ness. It's okay to have drama.

You make perfectly reasonable and often very good posts, and then people disagree, and there are hurt feelings. This is ok. You aren't responsible for other people's feelings. Your own hurt feelings are also OK. Give yourself permission to be human.

Your responsibility is to be authentic and genuine and (from STO perspective) to do your best to help out. Maybe sometimes this means saying things that trigger people, that upset them. Maybe the upset is part of their process and is what they really needed.

You can't control how people react to your posts. All you can control is your sincerity and intention. You do your best to be fair, kind, and clear, and you answer people's questions as best as you can and explain yourself as best as you can. You don't have any maliciousness or hostility in your posts that I can detect, at all. But even if you did it would not be the end of the world, because that's the nature of being human. Nobody's perfect.

There's nothing wrong with drama. It's all a part of the process. All of the "negativity" you see has nothing to do with you and is just humans being human. Allow them to be human; accept them as they are and don't worry about it.

Accept those people as the emotional, upset, angry, imperfect humans they are.

Also it's very likely that whatever negativity you're seeing, you are reading into it too much. It's so easy to think that someone is angry over the internet when they are just trying to be use a clear tone, for instance.

Hell, in one thread on this forum people were calling me a racist genocidal social darwinist neo-nazi or something and it was a complete misunderstanding. But you know what I realized? It's not a big deal. "We're all bozos on this bus" and I know these people aren't seeing me accurately, so all I can do is laugh and try to tell them that they've got it wrong. But this isn't always possible. And that's okay too.

I think your lesson here is to accept the things you can't change while still having the courage to speak your truth.

I, for one, think you are a great poster who contributes invaluably. It is impossible to please everyone all the time. But your true goal in posting isn't to please people, is it? It's to express yourself and your opinion and your truth. Be comfortable with the knowledge that you've been doing this, and be comfortable with the fact that in the process of being yourself there are some people who are gonna be mad at you no matter what.

[Richard]

Wanderer is just a word or a label for what you are doing. I think your process (and ours for that matter) of awakening is intensely personal. The meanings gleaned from your path or search won't be the same for everyone.

We can talk about what this bit of info means to us..but as this site shows, there is a wide range of opinions.

Ra needed a word to describe those who search. The choice of the noun.."Wanderer"...is appropriate IMO.

Richard

[Tenet Nosce]

Thank you, Tenet, for your answer. I see that you put lot of efforts in attempting to understand the concept of Harvest.

Thank you for your query. I have put much effort into understanding this concept, as it appears to be the key event of this my lifetime, shared here on this planet with others.

It is my wish to reach a consensus view before harvest occurs, although I realize the inherent difficulties with this desire- and can recognize how it may in fact be hindering my mission.

As I understand that I am part of a group mind- however tenuous the formation may be at this nexus- and therefore ideas, understandings, or innovations, which become available to my mind (of all manner, not simply Ra material interpretation) are broadcasted out to the group mind and offered freely for any who may find them useful.

For example, I regularly have many ideas concerning advancement in scientific study and practical applications to improve the quality of experience for all on this sphere. If I become aware of a "million dollar idea" rather than secret it away in some corner of my mind and plot to capitalize upon it by restricting others' ability to use "my" idea- I simply broadcast or radiate it out to the group mind.

Granted, once such an idea has been turned loose, I cannot control whether or not any others will pick it up, or whether or not somebody will try to twist it for selfish gain. But this is the methodology I came up with that seemed to be most acceptable to my sensibilities and respect for free will of others, with least potential for recurrence of the distortions which ostensibly occur when wanderers attempt to interface with the group mind- as for example can occur with the writing and publishing of books, "systems" of thought, and the like.

Thank you for your query, and for the opportunity to more clearly express my chosen form of service.

What I reacted at was your choice of words "I will be dead soon". How "soon" will be soon, in your current understanding, my brother? 1-2 years?

My choice of words was constructed in order to strike at the heart of the matter as it is for many reasons... a difficult thing to get under one's thumb. In such matters, I have found it to be more efficacious- but also potentially temporarily more disrupting- to speak directly and to the point..

According to my understanding, the event termed in the material as "harvest" will pass within the approximate time frame of 1-2 years, relative to this nexus, and relative to the limits of my consciousness due to the veil.

As I have come to expect the unexpected, I am anticipating many unforeseen aspects of this event, including the emergence of entirely new scenarios for resolution as the event itself unfolds. According to my estimations, such scenarios would center around the core vibration of JOY- rather than LOVE- and reflect a movement into the next stage of creation in this local universe. In other materials, this is referred to as the "shekinah" creations, and I would imagine that a large proportion of the newly formed Logoi would have incorporated, to some degree, physical experiences here on earth during this final cycle.

Barring the emergence of new possibilities, and according to the Ra material, after this 1-2 year period of harvest passes, it will no longer be possible for me to inhabit this 3D body which I have. I must admit this remains a source of confusion for me, as it would appear that I have the ability to respond to higher density catalyst- and yet my read of the material does require concluding that no 5D or 6D wanderers have hybrid bodies.

In addition, I can understand how the presence of 5D or 6D wanderers in a post-veil environment could be potentially crippling to the populace, and so can accept the necessity of removing myself from the situation. If possible, I would prefer that this be done with minimal disruption to others personally known to me so as not to cause them suffering with my departure.

I also realize that- as anybody else- I may depart from this sphere at any time by any number of mundane means, and that this is a "part of life" which must be accepted by all who participate.

Finally, while very intrigued in finding the above quote about the mind/body/spirit complex returning to the home density- this seems like a very special case and does correspond highly to the concept of "Ascension" as forwarded by others connected to the Ra material. This does create some concern as it would appear this "Ascension" is being promoted as something which will be available to all upon harvest- which is clearly not the case according to even the most standard read of the material.

Causing 3D entities to believe that they are going to "ascend" could result in extreme confusion carried over by these entities into their next incarnative cycle. This remains a concern to me, although I recognize it may be beyond my control.

[Oceania]

Yossarian haha. i love your post. Tenet just said something that made me upset and that's how i felt. like i was being judged based on one post, one moment of being human on the internet. but it also made me reflect. so even though it made me angry i still had a part of me that appreciated it. gah, it's so complicated. it's hard being human.

[Ankh]

I was kind of worried about you for a while there, Tenet, thinking that you were walking around in a belief that you will soon be dead =) Not that I know what will happen either, but my personal belief doesn't provide any catalysts to me upon this subject (anymore). If this belief will prove itself wrong later, then I had a great time until then Anyway, your post got me thinking about this Q'uo session. Here are some excerpts from that session:

From our point of view, we would say that ascension in general means to the population of those not Christian, perhaps not on a particular religious path at all, the event tied in with the date of the Winter Solstice of 2012, or whenever a particular seeker considers that third density is over and the next density or Age of man has begun.

Now, what virtue is there in considering how to ascend while in the body? My friends, in terms of activity within the body, we do not find that this is a helpful concept for all people. The reason that we say this is that each of you won his or her way into the earth plane [at the time of] the harvest. Many there are who wished to have incarnations upon Planet Earth at this time, either to help raise the consciousness of Planet Earth with their love, or to do the work of third density in achieving a satisfactory balance between love and wisdom, love and power, or wisdom and power.

Consequently, having won your way into the physical, we find there is wisdom in choosing to stay with the incarnation until you have learned all you can and served all you are able and are truly ready to let go of third density and all of its gifts and challenges.

However, the one known as Y noted that the kind of ascension that she has seen discussed in the book The Masters of the Far East [1] seems to be a lot like living in fourth density, and we find that the heart of the question concerning ascension while in the physical body is keyed to this realization.

...Others approach the problem of lifting consciousness from its moorings in third density by reading and attempting to assimilate the gathered wisdom of all religions and all cultures, all systems of lore and myth. And although the scholar’s way often stays within the head, rattling around, filling the mind’s closets and shelves with too much information, the wisdom seeps down into the heart of the scholar and pulls him forward. There are as many ways to approach the evolution of mind/body and spirit as there are people.

The key to this work is this: the consciousness that you share with all others who are self-aware is one. It is the consciousness of the Creator. It is the consciousness of complete and unconditional love. [It is] not love as known to the poets who speak of romance. [It is] not the love of brother for brother. [It is] not the love that is sentimentalized in valentines tied up with ribbons, gifted with pretty gems. This is a love that creates and destroys. This is a state of aliveness and endless potential.

There is also one session where Q'uo address the concept of Harvest and the dates, where I believe they state that 2011 will be no different from 2012, or was it 2013?, and that life will go on as usual. But I can't seem to find it now. (You posted somewhere, if my memory serves me well, how to search for specific sessions.)

With love and light, brother!

[Namaste]

More from Q'uo...

... And at the end of that work done within the school of life, the door of death opens, the Creator beckons, and through that door each goes. Upon the other side of that door, the decision for your harvest shall be made.

... For each person that experience will be unique. To our knowledge, there is no general harvest but, rather, the individual harvest of each soul upon each soul’s schedule.

[Tenet Nosce]

Yossarian haha. i love your post. Tenet just said something that made me upset and that's how i felt. like i was being judged based on one post, one moment of being human on the internet. but it also made me reflect. so even though it made me angry i still had a part of me that appreciated it. gah, it's so complicated. it's hard being human.

Thank you for your post. I had not actually been back to the thread in question and did not view your response until just now.

Indeed, I had no ill intent toward you with that post. I observed you to say that you "hate being here" and, recognizing this vibration as one which I previously moved through, I attempted to offer the understanding I received as a result of deep contemplation upon this experience.

My conclusions were thus: negative feelings around the birth moment (i.e. that one was born here against their will) have a propensity to reflect themselves as negative feelings around the death moment (i.e. that one will be taken from here against their will). Ergo, a "failure to accept that which is given" carrying the potential for a "bumpy" transition from this sphere.

My hope was that in sharing this realization, it may assist you in accepting the possibilities of a less "bumpy", or more peaceful, transition. Whenever that time may come for you.

My apologies for any distress my post may have caused you.

[Oceania]

thanks. i'm sorry too.

[Tenet Nosce]

Anytime anyone says or does anything there are others who are going to react in a seemingly "negative" way. They will disagree or push back. It doesn't mean either party is doing something wrong.

I appear to recall, somewhere in the depths of my being, a type of existence where this does not occur. As such, confusion is confusing to me.

Tenet Nosce, I read all your posts here and went back and read some of the threads you linked to try and get a good idea of what you're going through.

Thank you for taking the time. It is meaningful to me that another would even bother with such a task.

My verdict: learn to accept the drama, the froth, the whipped-up-ness. It's okay to have drama.

You make perfectly reasonable and often very good posts, and then people disagree, and there are hurt feelings. This is ok. You aren't responsible for other people's feelings. Your own hurt feelings are also OK. Give yourself permission to be human.

It does bring me relief to hear that my posts appear "reasonable" despite having drawn some false conclusions. It has caused me suffering to think that I might possibly be completely irrational, and grandly deluding myself, with respect to such ideas.

You are right. I am not responsible for other people's feelings. Although it would appear the vast majority of other-selves would disagree, I also cannot control their own perceptions with regard to their own lack of control over their own feelings.

I do struggle with this human-ness. It seems very odd to me. I will ponder more deeply upon my choice to experience myself in this temporary human form.

But, might I add, in an environment such as this web forum which was created with the intention of seekers having the opportunity to share ideas and collaborate with one another- that is would be highly preferable for all to "assume good faith" with respect to other's posts, and to refrain from derailing threads when their personal issues get triggered. I count myself among those who would benefit from keeping this in the forefront of their mind.

Your responsibility is to be authentic and genuine and (from STO perspective) to do your best to help out. Maybe sometimes this means saying things that trigger people, that upset them. Maybe the upset is part of their process and is what they really needed.

Thank you for reminding me about the boundary of my responsibility to others. I will refrain from commenting on other-selves here, however will observe in my own experience many occasions where the experience of "upset" was the trigger which caused me to seek more deeply within myself. Had not the "upsets" occurred, I may not have been compelled to take a closer look at that aspect of my psyche.

You can't control how people react to your posts. All you can control is your sincerity and intention. You do your best to be fair, kind, and clear, and you answer people's questions as best as you can and explain yourself as best as you can. You don't have any maliciousness or hostility in your posts that I can detect, at all. But even if you did it would not be the end of the world, because that's the nature of being human. Nobody's perfect.

Thank you for this.

There's nothing wrong with drama. It's all a part of the process. All of the "negativity" you see has nothing to do with you and is just humans being human. Allow them to be human; accept them as they are and don't worry about it.

Accept those people as the emotional, upset, angry, imperfect humans they are.

Also it's very likely that whatever negativity you're seeing, you are reading into it too much. It's so easy to think that someone is angry over the internet when they are just trying to be use a clear tone, for instance.

Thanks also for this, and I concur with the observations of yourself and others that I have been placing too much emphasis on this phenomenon. Let me clarify... concern over whether or not I have angered an other-self is secondary to the desire to simply make posts on this forum without the concomitant derailment which I have repeatedly experienced.

I have also observed a great number of members who very infrequently post, or don't at all. While I recognize this as a perfectly valid choice, I wonder if some of those members have chosen to participate less due to similar experiences of derailment and mischaracterization of their intent.

This saddens me, as I feel that there are many thoughts and ideas which these other-selves could share with me, were they to feel that they could post openly without being "jumped upon".

Hell, in one thread on this forum people were calling me a racist genocidal social darwinist neo-nazi or something and it was a complete misunderstanding. But you know what I realized? It's not a big deal. "We're all bozos on this bus" and I know these people aren't seeing me accurately, so all I can do is laugh and try to tell them that they've got it wrong. But this isn't always possible. And that's okay too.

Barring transient emotional outbursts and normal "being human" type stuff, it still does astound me that such accusations could fly around a forum ostensibly for spiritual seekers. This just seems beyond the bounds of what I conceive spirituality to be about. Clearly, I have much to learn.

I think your lesson here is to accept the things you can't change while still having the courage to speak your truth.

You are right. I must accept the inevitability of being perceived negatively by other-selves while these conditions remain. I look forward to a time/space where entities may more clearly perceive each other's hearts.

I, for one, think you are a great poster who contributes invaluably.

Thank you for this. I find it to be encouraging, while not at all "ego-inflating".

It is impossible to please everyone all the time.

Are we not all things? <--- this was my attempt at making a "funny".

But your true goal in posting isn't to please people, is it? It's to express yourself and your opinion and your truth. Be comfortable with the knowledge that you've been doing this, and be comfortable with the fact that in the process of being yourself there are some people who are gonna be mad at you no matter what.

You are again correct. And this does hit right at the crux of the matter, for self-expression seems to me to be the meeting-point between STS and STO. I am primarily here for my own spiritual evolution, and secondarily I am hoping that my attempts at self-expression and discovery serve as catalyst for others to also evolve.

I do apologize if this offends the sensibilities of other-selves, however to present myself as acting completely free of intent for "personal benefit" would be a lie, and quite possibly the grandest delusion one could put upon oneself... the delusion of "selflessness".

It is my understanding that in serving myself- that is to say my taking care of my own needs first- I empower myself to greater abilities to serve others when called. Thus it is possible for one to be firmly on the "STO" path, while taking actions which are self-serving. The question is the net polarization which occurs when all is said and done. I do not subscribe to the belief that self-serving behavior must needs lead to enslavement of other-selves.

The key is, of course, to recognize the unity of self with other-self while understanding the futility of attempting to acquire greater freedom through the enslavement of others.

Thank you for your discussion and insights into this matter.

[Tenet Nosce]

I was kind of worried about you for a while there, Tenet, thinking that you were walking around in a belief that you will soon be dead =)

You were correct in your perception, although it is no cause for worry. It was not causing me extreme states of morbidity or depression.

In fact, I regularly contemplate death. I especially consider the death of my loves ones, and this provides me with a keen catalyst to ensure that our relationships become increasingly harmonious and to ensure that I have nothing "left unsaid" to these loved ones, nor they to me.

I also contemplate my own death in various ways. One way which I have found particularly intriguing is to imagine my post-death self in review of this, my current incarnation. As the mind of my future-self scans back through its experience, it will connect with itself at all moments thus perceived as its "past".

Including this very moment. And this very moment. And this very moment.

Therefore it seems conceivable that- being aware that my own future-self is right now reviewing this very moment in which I am experiencing- it may be possible for a certain exchange of information to pass from the "future" to the "past" relative to the "present". This is extremely intriguing, and with immediately practical applications.

But to address your comment more directly. Thanks for your concern, but I am actually doing just fine. And getting better! My mental meanderings into the realm of the death experience do not involve thoughts of suicide- if by any chance that was part of your concern- although I have deeply contemplated suicide in the relatively distant past and found it to be an untenable proposition which no perceivable positive outcome.

Not that I know what will happen either, but my personal belief doesn't provide any catalysts to me upon this subject (anymore).

If you feel so inclined to share, publicly or privately, as to your personal beliefs on this matter, I would be keenly interested to know as I have observed you, in my interactions with you on this forum, to be consistently thoughtful, respectful, intelligent, well-timed, and emotionally available. I appreciate our interactions and would enjoy more of them.

Thank you also for the Q'uotes. I have previously read this session, however a revisit is both helpful and timely. I also find it intriguing with respect to a couple of obscure points:

The reason that we say this is that each of you won his or her way into the earth plane [at the time of] the harvest.

We have again a [bracketing] near the word harvest. I would be curious to know what, exactly, Q'uo did say here.

You have, among you on Planet Earth, sixteen different archetypal minds.

Twenty-one archetypes and sixteen archetypal minds. This is very intriguing.

Many there are who wished to have incarnations upon Planet Earth at this time, either to help raise the consciousness of Planet Earth with their love, or to do the work of third density in achieving a satisfactory balance between love and wisdom, love and power, or wisdom and power.

I recall noticing here that Q'uo was using the triad of "love", "wisdom", and "power". In contrast, Ra spoke more in terms of a duad of "love" and "light". This is fascinating.

Your experience will always overwrite the parts that make up the sum of what you observe.

This just made my crown chakra pop.

Speaking more broadly:

...Others approach the problem of lifting consciousness from its moorings in third density by reading and attempting to assimilate the gathered wisdom of all religions and all cultures, all systems of lore and myth. And although the scholar’s way often stays within the head, rattling around, filling the mind’s closets and shelves with too much information, the wisdom seeps down into the heart of the scholar and pulls him forward. There are as many ways to approach the evolution of mind/body and spirit as there are people.

Ah, yes. In recognizing the insatiable nature of my mind, this has been a consciously chosen path of mine for quite some time. It is, in fact, what originally brought me to the Ra material.

Although I have experienced the benefits of meditation, exercise, and eating well, I have not found these to be as effective due to the incessantly questioning nature of my mind. No sooner do I actively take up these practices, then I feel drawn to deeply investigate all the varying methodologies, comparing them, and attempting to draw a synthesis from the best of all methods. Nevertheless, even these efforts have been fruitful to varying degrees, and I now meditate, exercise, and eat well more often than ever before.

Tabernacling has been rather difficult for me, except when I have had ample time to "wind down" in a natural setting, such as a rainforest. Interesting that "going within" should have so much to do with external environment.

There is also one session where Q'uo address the concept of Harvest and the dates, where I believe they state that 2011 will be no different from 2012, or was it 2013?, and that life will go on as usual. But I can't seem to find it now. (You posted somewhere, if my memory serves me well, how to search for specific sessions.)

Yes, here is the Q'uote:

Third-density Earth is an Earth whose light is waning. While it will remain third-density, it will no longer support third-density entities in their seeking of the truth. Thusly, third density is shortly to become inactive, we would say, within three or four hundred of your years beyond 2012. Thusly, 2013 upon your planet will look very much like 2012 upon your planet. However, you will find that your population of entities grows more and more interested and fascinated with the reparation of the Earth and the healing of what you call your Mother Earth or Gaia.

Interestingly, I recently referred to this session, as it contains two queries in reference to the veil. One of which is my own.

Even more interestingly, I note that the query I glossed over when reading this the first time with respect to the Significators might currently be significant. Unfortunately, I must depart for an appointment and so must come back to this later.

With love and light, brother!

And wisdom and power!