Has anyone rediscovered the joy?

[Jeremy]

So the time has hopefully finally come where I've said enough is enough when it comes to existing in this dark night of the soul as its come to be known. Though it hasn't exactly been a night and more like years, it started with contemplation while attempting to fall asleep the night before last. Accepting that life has become dreary and mundane. Full of negativity and disgust at every turn. My life has become nothing but work, drink, sleep. I may go a couple days without alcohol but that's about it. I've lost the motivation to workout and be healthy. I smoke much more than I used to. I still enjoy most of my normal activities so it's not clinical depression. I've just forgotten what it feels like to be happy about life. 

Upon my eventual drive to work the next morning, I started probing my mind. How do I find joy again? How do I rediscover myself and actually live the philosophy that I had come to love? How do I stop the incessant annoyances of every day life? It came to me that I just have to do it but how? I know that it's all simply a perception. A switch that goes from seeing what I don't have and realizing what I do have and be happy for that yet the consistent dribble of negativity still resides.

I get that this will take time. Time to undo all of the negative biases that I had once undone only to be required through the lack of meditation and discipline. I understand that it won't be an epiphany like moment akin to when I first discovered this material. That was a once in a lifetime event and though I wholeheartedly wish I could experience that again, I realize that that honeymoon period has expired and that the responsibility that I had taken on is what I must adhere to.

So with all of that said, has anyone gone through this and found their way back? Back to the joy and happiness of that Rocky path that we all walk? 

[the]

feel free to read "The Ascension Papers" if that resonates with you, and see if you can get your joy back. good luck

https://zingdad.com/publications/books/t...ers-book-1

[hounsic]

My first step was sobriety, once I removed alcohol (not easy) and daily made effort things slowly but surely started improving. Every day trying to meditate in whatever form that takes. Glad your back!

[Diana]

I will say that the sense of playfulness or lightheartedness is more difficult in today's environment than it ever has been (for me). I agree with hounsic that removing alcohol would be an effective thing to do, as it just distracts and numbs what is. Additionally, optimizing physical health in any way possible.

Joy comes in moments for me, rather than a state of mind. I'm not advanced enough to be content in joy in this place at this time. The way I live my life is much like this quote from George Bernard Shaw:

[AnthroHeart]

I have joy, working on compassion.

[moyal]

Removing alcohol and coffee + a job where I have to get up at midnight and then deliver newspapers for 4-8 hours 6 days pro week (means getting paid for fitness-training) + frequently doing meditation + daily taking a cold shower = did it for me.

[Jeremy]

My first step was sobriety, once I removed alcohol (not easy) and daily made effort things slowly but surely started improving. Every day trying to meditate in whatever form that takes. Glad your back!

 That is most definitely the starting point. I've used it to dull the frustrations of everyday life and work. Honestly I couldn't even tell you last time I went more than a few days without drinking.it's become my crutch for everything

As for meditation, this is one area that will be difficult due to our living arrangements and the numerous pets we have but we'll figure out a way as I know it's definitely something that must be revisited. 

I've attempted rereads of the material but lose the motivation that I had when I first read the material but I'm going to try again. I know in the past, I've noticed I either forgot aspects of it or info that didn't resonate at the time. 

[moyal]

...I've attempted rereads of the material but lose the motivation that I had when I first read the material but I'm going to try again. I know in the past, I've noticed I either forgot aspects of it or info that didn't resonate at the time. 

You could read this. Maybe it is useful for you:
-> https://www.laurency.com/Fke/Fke.pdf

[flofrog]

I dont know if this will help Jeremy, this is what it did for me. [ I was not drinking at the time but would totally agree with hounsic ]

I decided I would take everyday a moment for like 15/20 minutes to have a cup of tea/coffee outside and designate this moment just to myself exclusively with no loving thoughts for anyone else but me. Seems very self centered but you know, strange enough, I started to rebuild this way. I think at the beginning I could only stand ten minutes, and then gradually extended to 20. These last years, I have put a load on my plate and don't stop all day, some activities I love, some less but I still do the pause, and that is outside pure meditation.

Safe journey Jeremy

on edit: pause today is still on myself (!) but mixed with gratitude to the all

[sillypumpkins]

personally I went through about 2 years of an intense dark night of the soul in which I was struggling with depression, anxiety, using drugs (marijuana mostly) to distract myself. this began a little over two years ago.

i spent time telling myself, "if only i could just get sober, then i'd be alright," among other things, but the sobriety thing was big for me. i spent a month sober last summer and i still felt the same, only sober. that was big for me, realizing that nothing by itself like that will "cure" me

it was only until i truly understood that i am exactly where i need to be, and that i truly have nothing to worry about, is when i began to find that place you seem to be talking about. once i understood these things, i was able to let go of these things that were holding me back, in a much more organic way, rather than just cutting them out without thought.

18.5 Questioner: Thank you. I have a question here from Jim that I will read verbatim: “Much of the mystic tradition of seeking on Earth holds that belief that the individual self must be erased or obliterated and the material world ignored for an entity to reach ‘nirvana,’ as it’s called, or enlightenment. What is the proper role of the individual self and its worldly activities in aiding an entity to grow more into the Law of One?”

Ra: I am Ra. The proper role of the entity is in this density to experience all things desired, to then analyze, understand, and accept these experiences, distilling from them the love/light within them. Nothing shall be overcome. That which is not needed falls away.

this is all just my experience. it might not apply to you, and das coo for some, cutting it all out is a vital step. just wanted to share my experience

hope that helps. and safe journeys

[Dtris]

Sometimes you just have to say f-the depression and the funk and get out and do what you want or need to do. I think this is more true for men. Our nature is active and we have an innate need to act on our surroundings and world. So do something active, gardening, walking, wood working, etc. Anything you enjoy that is active and not passive. Passive includes browsing online forums, reading, or in any way absorbing energy. There needs to be a balance between creativity and projecting energy and absorbing energy.

[Jeremy]

Sometimes you just have to say f-the depression and the funk and get out and do what you want or need to do. I think this is more true for men. Our nature is active and we have an innate need to act on our surroundings and world. So do something active, gardening, walking, wood working, etc. Anything you enjoy that is active and not passive. Passive includes browsing online forums, reading, or in any way absorbing energy. There needs to be a balance between creativity and projecting energy and absorbing energy.

Yea social media has also become quite the distraction. I can go down the Twitter rabbit hole for hours and I've noticed that I'd read useless info that does nothing but frustrate and annoy me so that's going by the wayside as well. I try to keep my main feed restricted to soccer but transient subjects always get retweeted which I invariably see

[Dtris]

Sometimes you just have to say f-the depression and the funk and get out and do what you want or need to do. I think this is more true for men. Our nature is active and we have an innate need to act on our surroundings and world. So do something active, gardening, walking, wood working, etc. Anything you enjoy that is active and not passive. Passive includes browsing online forums, reading, or in any way absorbing energy. There needs to be a balance between creativity and projecting energy and absorbing energy.

Yea social media has also become quite the distraction. I can go down the Twitter rabbit hole for hours and I've noticed that I'd read useless info that does nothing but frustrate and annoy me so that's going by the wayside as well. I try to keep my main feed restricted to soccer but transient subjects always get retweeted which I invariably see

I haven't checked facebook in a week and I am much better for it I think. There is just way too much bull crap on there. Not to mention it has increased my focus and productivity.

[Black Dragon]

So the time has hopefully finally come where I've said enough is enough when it comes to existing in this dark night of the soul as its come to be known. Though it hasn't exactly been a night and more like years, it started with contemplation while attempting to fall asleep the night before last. Accepting that life has become dreary and mundane. Full of negativity and disgust at every turn. My life has become nothing but work, drink, sleep. I may go a couple days without alcohol but that's about it. I've lost the motivation to workout and be healthy. I smoke much more than I used to. I still enjoy most of my normal activities so it's not clinical depression. I've just forgotten what it feels like to be happy about life. 

Upon my eventual drive to work the next morning, I started probing my mind. How do I find joy again? How do I rediscover myself and actually live the philosophy that I had come to love? How do I stop the incessant annoyances of every day life? It came to me that I just have to do it but how? I know that it's all simply a perception. A switch that goes from seeing what I don't have and realizing what I do have and be happy for that yet the consistent dribble of negativity still resides.

I get that this will take time. Time to undo all of the negative biases that I had once undone only to be required through the lack of meditation and discipline. I understand that it won't be an epiphany like moment akin to when I first discovered this material. That was a once in a lifetime event and though I wholeheartedly wish I could experience that again, I realize that that honeymoon period has expired and that the responsibility that I had taken on is what I must adhere to.

So with all of that said, has anyone gone through this and found their way back? Back to the joy and happiness of that Rocky path that we all walk? 

I'm in a prolonged DNS myself that's been going on for years, and the depression is still a lot deeper for me than just "blah". I'm in the process of finding my way out as well, but it's rough and there's no real clear path. Maybe mix things up and try a new hobby, even if it's just one you can do from home at the moment with quarantine. I've taken up designing, building, and flying RC planes from foam board and electric parts. I'm also in the process of overcoming feelings of cynicism, abandonment, and resentment when it comes to the topic of extra terrestrials, and working back to that innocence, that childlike sense of wonder, excitement, and curiosity I once felt about the subject.

I'm starting to get into some CE5, and it dovetails nicely into my RC hobby, where I'm outside with a camera strapped to my head looking at the sky for prolonged periods of time, while being "in the zone" and having fun. My planes can be used as sort of a focal point or beacon, and it does work. It was already happening before I made a conscious effort to engage, and at first I was so cynical and burnt out of life, I just sort of said "yeah whatever f*** you, you've never been there for me when I needed you, and there's a million videos of s*** like this out there nobody believes anyway". When I'd go out with this kind of attitude, I'd get nothing. I even intentionally directed anger at a picture of one of the objects I saw, and held onto the resentment, and that slowed/stopped the phenomenon for a while, but when I reassessed my attitude and opened up, went out and just had fun, it picked up again.

Point is, both the RC hobby and the CE5 are things to do that give me purpose and meaning, despite how down in the dumps I am. Hopefully you can mix up your routine a little bit too and find something to keep you engaged with life. I'd say the most important things are that whatever your doing, you do it with childlike innocence, wonder, and excitement rather than cynicism or apathy(and believe me, I know how difficult that can be when we are in a phase like this, and both internal and external events are so dreary). It's sort of a nurturing your inner child sort of thing, if that makes any sense.

[Agua]

removed

[sillypumpkins]

Love it agua

When I was going through my dark nights, remembering that old cliche "the night is always darkest before the dawn" gave me strength to keep going. Agua is so right when he says that after each dark night comes an even brighter day of the soul....

[flofrog]

Jeremy last night I was going on reading Michael Newton's Wisdom of Souls and there was that passage which made me think of you and this thread,  perhaps it is of interest.  The person doing a regression is a sixth three-year old biologist who had a NDE and here's what she says.

 So, I am seeing alternative futures, because the past and the future are similar. All of them exist, but in potential form only. It's by connecting the dots that the optimal future, the pathway to healing, becomes the only possible pathway. The free will choice involves only one of an infinite number of possible futures. It's the connection with the higher soul that is all openness around eternity , infinite dimensions, all existence visualizing the pathway. The higher perspective is from the direction of the oneness, and only by originating in the oneness can one begin to perceive how actuality functions. It's all done from pure unconditional and infinitely all-inspiring Loveland connection. A love of creator, creation, it's made of pure gratitude, love, bliss, joy and the original actuality.

Pfew... that took me a long time to get to 'joy'  so sorry   !!! lol