How could I better appreciate the those walking a negative path while REMAINING posit

[EvolvingPhoenix]

I get the feel that I'm possibly running from the side of me which appreciates the negative path.

I FULLY INTEND to stay positive.

That being said, I wonder if my fears may come from a lack of true perspective on the negative path to better appreciate them. NAturally, I sent a PM to GentleReckoning asking for help in this matter, but I would also like any advice I can get.

Until I FACE whatever I'm running away from within myself, I think these fears may still be an issue.

What meaningful ACTION may heal/transmute/balance this?

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Maybe it's cause the STS path is "self reliant" and I'm still living with my folks? Maybe I'm just afraid to walk a path of self reliance? I dunno... I am REALLY trying to figure this fear out.

[Plenum]

Maybe it's cause the STS path is "self reliant" and I'm still living with my folks? Maybe I'm just afraid to walk a path of self reliance? I dunno... I am REALLY trying to figure this fear out.

the two paths are configured around a relationship to the other-self.

Service to Others: respect, honoring, mutual relating
Service to Self: moving ahead, disregarding, cannibalising, subjugating the other-selves around them

Both paths require an amount of 'self-reliance'.

In fact, self-reliance is pretty the aspect that Ra pinpoints as the Primary Energy Centers (chakras 1, 3, and 5).

The even numbered chakras (2, 4, 6) are more aspects that point to management of the inner wellsprings, the true creative potentials.

These are broad generations - of course.  

But a lot of people want to be 'self empowered'.  That's not inherently negative.  It all depends on how the Relationship is structured to the people around you.

Is there mutual respect?  Or is there basically disregard and over-riding of other people's concerns?  Think of a military organization, or a mafia captain.

Once you 'join' a negative organization, there's very little leeway to say: "oh sorry - this isn't what I wanted.  I want to leave now."  There's basically massive punishment and coercion to stop you from leaving.  It's a control structure based on enslavement of the people at lower rungs of the ladder.

Of course - there's a strong desire to become independent.  Having resources gives you so much more Experience!  You can travel.  Eat out.  Have good times with others.

It's good to become an adult

[EvolvingPhoenix]

A friend just posted this in a PM on Facebook:

"Stepping out of your comfort zone is hard. Being born is hard. Being reborn is hard. Going for your dreams is hard.

Nothing about what you are doing is easy.

But living as you are is even harder and you know that with all the pain and grief that you have been through."


I had told her about Agua's post regarding the metaphor of birth and how it plays into my fears, suggesting that it's apart of the RE-birthing process, as Agua may have been.

[Surfboard]

Meditation

Others advice will only further distort you

You need more awareness of the self which comes from meditation

The best advice you can get is from yourself, you just have to listen

No one knows you like you know you

[Agua]

removed

[EvolvingPhoenix]

I had told her about Agua's post regarding the metaphor of birth and how it plays into my fears, suggesting that it's apart of the RE-birthing process, as Agua may have been.

you might find out one day that it wasnt a metaphor actually

True, but in a sense, EVERYTHING is a metaphor haha, but yeah I see whatchu mean. Still, it WORKS as a good metaphor.

I am rebirthing myself. I think that's what this is, because my understanding of what time/space even IS was off.

So my fears about that incident weren't even quite fearing what actually HAPPENED, but a somewhat inaccurate interpretation.

I think I actually just feared being tricked into part of SPACE/TIME then again, I dunno. As soon as I wrote that, I felt an energy drop in my body and a slight sharp pain in the solar plexus region. Although, the fear, while still present, is a little less. Actually, with that realization, I'm calming down right now.

[Agua]

removed

[Patrick]

You could accept the "negativity" you have in yourself.
All the unloved, denied and rejected parts in you...

 
Yes.  Once, while pondering these things, I started feeling the pleasure of rape and control over others.  That was quite scary until I realized that, while I am that as well, the current I is not here to play this role at this time and such choices that would lead me there are not the ones I am making at this time.  It's much easier accepting and forgiving such people after having had this inner experience.
 

[Sacred Fool]

You could accept the "negativity" you have in yourself.
All the unloved, denied and rejected parts in you...

 
Yes.  Once, while pondering these things, I started feeling the pleasure of rape and control over others.  That was quite scary until I realized that, while I am that as well, the current I is not here to play this role at this time and such choices that would lead me there are not the ones I am making at this time.  It's much easier accepting and forgiving such people after having had this inner experience.
 

Reveling in red ray energy, then creating distance from it could engender an energy blockage.  You might consider other ways of relating to it which do not sequester it, but rather let it flow onward.
 

[EvolvingPhoenix]

You could accept the "negativity" you have in yourself.
All the unloved, denied and rejected parts in you...

 
Yes.  Once, while pondering these things, I started feeling the pleasure of rape and control over others.  That was quite scary until I realized that, while I am that as well, the current I is not here to play this role at this time and such choices that would lead me there are not the ones I am making at this time.  It's much easier accepting and forgiving such people after having had this inner experience.
 

Reveling in red ray energy, then creating distance from it could engender an energy blockage.  You might consider other ways of relating to it which do not sequester it, but rather let it flow onward.
 

How does one do that?

[Glow]

....
I think I actually just feared being tricked into part of SPACE/TIME then again, I dunno. As soon as I wrote that, I felt an energy drop in my body and a slight sharp pain in the solar plexus region. Although, the fear, while still present, is a little less. Actually, with that realization, I'm calming down right now.

Something my higherself has taught me may apply if you can already pick up how your thoughts effect you.

Thoughts are not really you they are well worn tracks in a record but you can make new tracks, and as you stop using the old ones they will smooth out and be less automatic.

So thinking I think I actually just feared being tricked into part of SPACE/TIME then again, makes you feel "energy drop in my body and a slight sharp pain in the solar plexus"

Try when you have a thought like that or just before if you catch yourself try just saying it different from a higher perspective.

Say I am so glad I am here and not in neg. Time/Space or maybe you can word it better but feel in your body how saying the new version effects you. Find one that feels better.

This is one use for a pendulem if you can't always feel how the thought is effecting you.

Place a marker for uplifting/positive/helpful(choose your discriptor) and another for unhelpful/negative/depressive.. whatever.

Then holding the pendulum between them once you have done whatever protection work makes you fearless ask your higherself to help you know which thoughts are most uplifting/possitive vs your other descripter.

The pendulum if you stay relaxed and detatched(you will likely need to meditate to get to that detached place) will indicate which thoughts are helping lift you up or not. The ones that are not try saying them a different way till you get a possitive response.

Please use your own intuition here. If you do not feel this excersize resonates please cast it aside.
I only mention it as you are showing you can already feel how your thoughts effect your energy.
Harness that.  

note: detachment with and dowsing or intuitive work is very important. If the ego is at all picking a side communication is distorted. This is why Carla's trance channeling was so pure, no ego.

Meditation, meditation how many times I wonder is it mentioned in the Law of One ?

[Glow]

You could accept the "negativity" you have in yourself.
All the unloved, denied and rejected parts in you.
That guy you absolutely dont want to be but actually are

We all have greed, hate, wishes for manipulation, revenge and whatever.
Acknowledge them, embrace them.

I guess the difference between postive and negative is:
positive accepts these parts, finds out what is behind it and heals it, without acting out the negativity.
negative consciously and purposefully acts it out.

When you allow it to be, you have a choice.
When you deny it, you have no choice, it will unconsciously act itself out

Just wanted to bold that part.
It needs to be understood and loved because it has been hurt and scared and it is these parts that act out.

Shadow/dark are just other ways of saying unconsious. We don't know the why, because we are afraid to really look at them so they stay in darkness. Shine light on them, find out the why, have compassion for the why and you who carries the why.
Then they heal

[GentleReckoning]

The heart reflects the solar heart.

Relationship, duration, frequency, spin, and balance. (the more aligned with your truth the relationships are, the faster you enter into positive time/space)

Simply create a somewhat orderly, balanced life, and you'll manifest all you need to be positive.

Unless your reality is being dominated by a shadow lesson that needs balancing. Then you'll simply go more and more into negative spaces so that you may manifest the distortion so it may be balanced.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

The heart reflects the solar heart.

Relationship, duration, frequency, spin, and balance. (the more aligned with your truth the relationships are, the faster you enter into positive time/space)

Simply create a somewhat orderly, balanced life, and you'll manifest all you need to be positive.

Unless your reality is being dominated by a shadow lesson that needs balancing. Then you'll simply go more and more into negative spaces so that you may manifest the distortion so it may be balanced.

Do you think I'm balancing shadow aspects with all the s*** I'm going through?

I'm gonna be honest. Your 1111 synchronicities post got me anxious again.

I worry maybe I'm doing the POSITIVE version of what Hitler did.

Polarizing positively SO FAST.

I feel better about my anxieties ONLY AFTER I do good s***! I just hung out with a friend today I don't hang out with enough.

If I properly integrate my positive truth, I'll be good then, right?

EDIT: As soon as I write that, I calm myself about the freakout I'm having by saying "I have faith in my higher self" and I think I've got what I'm really doing here is just exploring some sort of aspect of the darker side I'm sloughing off or something. Or maybe just working through issues deep down that are all coming up.

I look at the clock. 4:40

I feel compelled to look it up:

"ANGEL NUMBER 440. ... Angel Number 440 is a message that the hard work and effort you have put towards living your spiritual truths and virtues have been acknowledged by the spiritual realm. The angels wish to commend you on your diligence and determination and send you encouragement, blessings and love.Sep 1, 2011"

Sounds encouraging.