12-09-2010, 10:59 PM
Hello,
I'd like to tell you some of my story. This is how I woke up.
Three paragraphs of backstory - I'm 30 years old. I grew up in small town Canada. When I was 17 I got a job and saved up and travelled to Port-au-Prince, Haiti. I was no wordly guy - a kid from the country, a bookworm farmhand, but I needed to see what was really happening. I was changed by the trip. I returned determined to understand the injustice of our politics and economics so they may be remedied. I studied Noam Chomsky and his hero, Bertrand Russell.
I had an idea one day. I was trying to write an essay for a metaphysics class and I got caught up with the idea that most philosophy I'd read presupposed that categories were real. Innocently I thought what the opposite presupposition might entail. What followed was an intense mental event. I suddenly realized that there were no boundaries in the universe. So I ran out of the library.
I'd heard this before of course. You hear it every day if you listen. But in that moment I had a peek at the implications. Soon I began to view the political problems differently. What was now clear to me was that I had become somewhat hardened. If I were to ever to approach positive social change I must learn to first (and this part was hard to admit) love everyone and everything. I had not meditated before, so I started there. This is where my story starts.
A day after I started meditating I friend stopped by with a strange gift. He had been given some morning glory (ololiuqui) seeds by a friend of his who had experimented with altered states of consciousness. I did some research, reading dozens of peer reviewed publications. Eventually I decided the potential benefit outweighed the risk of harm. I was also swayed by the uncanny nature and timing of the events of the last two days. So I prepared the seeds, took the dose, and very seriously centered on asking how to love everyone and everything.
About an hour passed. Suddenly and much to my surprise information entered. It was an old stone pyramid with the message 'this isn't a pyramid, this is a sphere. this isn't a sphere, its a single point. this isn't a point, it is nothing at all. it is everything'. The shape/concept elaborated itself into a flowing toroidal vortex (I didn't know what this was at the time). I was not expecting geometry. I wasn't expecting anything really, but certainly not that.
I woke up the next morning compelled to draw the shape. I'd look at the diagram and feel it was wrong and draw it differently. Over and over and over, always groups of three. Along with the shapes were strangely spiritual phrases describing the motion of energy. I didn't know what any of it meant but I had to write it down. I was using electrical terms that I did not understand to explain spiritual concepts. It was deeply odd. Suddenly the urge vanished and I went about my day.
A week later, after I had been looking up motors and generators trying to understand what on earth I was drawing before, I found something. It was a documentary on Nikola Tesla. Not only did I see the shapes in his work notes, but the phrases I wrote next to spoken aloud by the narrator. It was truly unnerving. I wrote down the word 'synchronicity' before I even knew what it meant. That whole day was amok with it. As I pursued different threads, I became aware something was happening. People started saying the words in my head during conversations. The radio, television, passing pedestrians, would answer my passing mental questions in perfect ryhthm. For a time I would wake up simply 'knowing' something utterly useless - what my friend was dreaming about, levels of supply at work, that my mother was coming to visit out of the blue, the first sentence someone would say that day, etc. These synchronistic events peaked after about three weeks when I found the Law of One material.
As strange as this work was - it was coherent, it never contradicted itself, and it explained everything that was happening. How could this be faked? It was clearly a work of genius either way, deserving of study regardless of its origin.
This material changed my tack and hastened my pursuit. Synchronistic strangeness followed me. I took up the study of the tarot discussed in the later workings. I printed out the images to aid the study. After a few days, I was at my computer playing an online poker tournament when I noticed the tarot deck i had made. I picked it up and pondered for a moment the connection between the tarot and the modern playing card deck.
For some reason I felt a strong compulsion to shuffle the cards. I had been very careful to keep them in order (although I'd noticed the 13 card kept accidentally falling out) but now felt there was some power involved in shuffling them. I was doing this for a minute or so absently when I was dealt two aces, the strongest hand in my game (texas hold'em). I had been playing this tournament all night and was doing very well, a few players out from the final table (a rare and lucrative achievement in such a large tournament).
Still shuffling, I saw the next minute unfold in an instant. This next part sounds crazy. I knew my raise would be called by one player, that I would make three aces on the flop, the other player would bluff all his chips when I checked, and he would catch a miracle straight to eliminate me. As this scenario unfolded exactly as I saw it, I continued to shuffle the cards. At the end of the hand, all of my chips went to the player named "nickel13". I knew that if I looked down I would see not only the 13 card, but for some reason I knew that the cards would be in order again. It was and they were.
Please take a moment to consider the odds of shuffling 22 cards in perfect order. The number is too big to write on a piece of paper, it makes winning the lottery look commonplace. I felt its meaning immediately - there's a part of you thats a part of this, that is with everything, knows everything. Of course, I was the only witness to this statistical miracle, it would be meaningful only to me. So I ran out of the house.
Its been almost two years since this tremendous tap on the shoulder. I've tried to absorb, tried to listen, and tried to love more and more since then. My heart isn't so hard anymore as my perceptions keep shifting, but my mind buzzes with questions. I am at all times confused. I have no trouble obeying that law.
I have a real urge to understand why I chose to come here. My dreams indicate I'm from a different place. In a lucid dream I met my people in a library. They were overcome with laughter, trying to hold it in. I knew I was lucid but was disturbed to see I couldn't control them, that they were 'of their own'. This delighted them. They gave me a business card with big indigo letters 'UHO' and said "you are a member of the blue protocol. its time you remembered who you really are". I was too alarmed, so I ran out of the library and woke up. Now I wish I hadn't.
Thanks for reading. If you have any thoughts or insight or questions please pass'em along.
I'd like to tell you some of my story. This is how I woke up.
Three paragraphs of backstory - I'm 30 years old. I grew up in small town Canada. When I was 17 I got a job and saved up and travelled to Port-au-Prince, Haiti. I was no wordly guy - a kid from the country, a bookworm farmhand, but I needed to see what was really happening. I was changed by the trip. I returned determined to understand the injustice of our politics and economics so they may be remedied. I studied Noam Chomsky and his hero, Bertrand Russell.
I had an idea one day. I was trying to write an essay for a metaphysics class and I got caught up with the idea that most philosophy I'd read presupposed that categories were real. Innocently I thought what the opposite presupposition might entail. What followed was an intense mental event. I suddenly realized that there were no boundaries in the universe. So I ran out of the library.
I'd heard this before of course. You hear it every day if you listen. But in that moment I had a peek at the implications. Soon I began to view the political problems differently. What was now clear to me was that I had become somewhat hardened. If I were to ever to approach positive social change I must learn to first (and this part was hard to admit) love everyone and everything. I had not meditated before, so I started there. This is where my story starts.
A day after I started meditating I friend stopped by with a strange gift. He had been given some morning glory (ololiuqui) seeds by a friend of his who had experimented with altered states of consciousness. I did some research, reading dozens of peer reviewed publications. Eventually I decided the potential benefit outweighed the risk of harm. I was also swayed by the uncanny nature and timing of the events of the last two days. So I prepared the seeds, took the dose, and very seriously centered on asking how to love everyone and everything.
About an hour passed. Suddenly and much to my surprise information entered. It was an old stone pyramid with the message 'this isn't a pyramid, this is a sphere. this isn't a sphere, its a single point. this isn't a point, it is nothing at all. it is everything'. The shape/concept elaborated itself into a flowing toroidal vortex (I didn't know what this was at the time). I was not expecting geometry. I wasn't expecting anything really, but certainly not that.
I woke up the next morning compelled to draw the shape. I'd look at the diagram and feel it was wrong and draw it differently. Over and over and over, always groups of three. Along with the shapes were strangely spiritual phrases describing the motion of energy. I didn't know what any of it meant but I had to write it down. I was using electrical terms that I did not understand to explain spiritual concepts. It was deeply odd. Suddenly the urge vanished and I went about my day.
A week later, after I had been looking up motors and generators trying to understand what on earth I was drawing before, I found something. It was a documentary on Nikola Tesla. Not only did I see the shapes in his work notes, but the phrases I wrote next to spoken aloud by the narrator. It was truly unnerving. I wrote down the word 'synchronicity' before I even knew what it meant. That whole day was amok with it. As I pursued different threads, I became aware something was happening. People started saying the words in my head during conversations. The radio, television, passing pedestrians, would answer my passing mental questions in perfect ryhthm. For a time I would wake up simply 'knowing' something utterly useless - what my friend was dreaming about, levels of supply at work, that my mother was coming to visit out of the blue, the first sentence someone would say that day, etc. These synchronistic events peaked after about three weeks when I found the Law of One material.
As strange as this work was - it was coherent, it never contradicted itself, and it explained everything that was happening. How could this be faked? It was clearly a work of genius either way, deserving of study regardless of its origin.
This material changed my tack and hastened my pursuit. Synchronistic strangeness followed me. I took up the study of the tarot discussed in the later workings. I printed out the images to aid the study. After a few days, I was at my computer playing an online poker tournament when I noticed the tarot deck i had made. I picked it up and pondered for a moment the connection between the tarot and the modern playing card deck.
For some reason I felt a strong compulsion to shuffle the cards. I had been very careful to keep them in order (although I'd noticed the 13 card kept accidentally falling out) but now felt there was some power involved in shuffling them. I was doing this for a minute or so absently when I was dealt two aces, the strongest hand in my game (texas hold'em). I had been playing this tournament all night and was doing very well, a few players out from the final table (a rare and lucrative achievement in such a large tournament).
Still shuffling, I saw the next minute unfold in an instant. This next part sounds crazy. I knew my raise would be called by one player, that I would make three aces on the flop, the other player would bluff all his chips when I checked, and he would catch a miracle straight to eliminate me. As this scenario unfolded exactly as I saw it, I continued to shuffle the cards. At the end of the hand, all of my chips went to the player named "nickel13". I knew that if I looked down I would see not only the 13 card, but for some reason I knew that the cards would be in order again. It was and they were.
Please take a moment to consider the odds of shuffling 22 cards in perfect order. The number is too big to write on a piece of paper, it makes winning the lottery look commonplace. I felt its meaning immediately - there's a part of you thats a part of this, that is with everything, knows everything. Of course, I was the only witness to this statistical miracle, it would be meaningful only to me. So I ran out of the house.
Its been almost two years since this tremendous tap on the shoulder. I've tried to absorb, tried to listen, and tried to love more and more since then. My heart isn't so hard anymore as my perceptions keep shifting, but my mind buzzes with questions. I am at all times confused. I have no trouble obeying that law.
I have a real urge to understand why I chose to come here. My dreams indicate I'm from a different place. In a lucid dream I met my people in a library. They were overcome with laughter, trying to hold it in. I knew I was lucid but was disturbed to see I couldn't control them, that they were 'of their own'. This delighted them. They gave me a business card with big indigo letters 'UHO' and said "you are a member of the blue protocol. its time you remembered who you really are". I was too alarmed, so I ran out of the library and woke up. Now I wish I hadn't.
Thanks for reading. If you have any thoughts or insight or questions please pass'em along.
