Public Performance Anxieties?

[Plenum]

does anyone else have public performance anxieties?

I mean, like getting up on stage, giving a speech, or a musical performance?  Perhaps giving a talk to your co-workers at a team meeting?  or perhaps giving a speech at a wedding?

I've got a job where I just sit in front of a screen, and can do my work without anyone watching *how* I work.  They are only interested in the end results.

But one of my good friends is a high school teacher, and doing that work, in front of a classroom, with all eyes on you all the time ... well, that would be one of my worst nightmares to be honest, to be on display like that for hours each day, in front of different aged students.  

I don't mind working and 'performing tasks'; even this is just typing into a screen, and making your presence known.  And yet ... to be on display ... well ... notch that up to another yellow-ray anxiety of mine

maybe I fear being judged for my physical appearance.  Maybe I fear being judged for every misstep or mistake I might offer in a 'real time' situation.

But I am definitely not a public performer.  I always used to get a note so that I wouldn't have to swim at the school swimming carnivals.  I pulled out of a recital where all the school kids were playing recorder, just a simple piece of music, when I was in junior school (about age 10).

[Minyatur]

I do dislike being at the center of attention, I tend to lurk in shadows. But it's not a fear just something I tend to avoid.

[Bluebell]

i walked past a smiling homeless man today. i tried to return smile, it came out an awkward grimace & then i just kept walking.

half my problems can be blamed on scopophobia. a fear of being seen. few people understand how debilitating & terrifying it is.

Scopophobia is unique among phobias in that the fear of being looked at is considered both a social phobia and a specific phobia, because it is a specific occurrence which takes place in a social setting.[sup][9][/sup] Most phobias typically fall in either one category or the other but scopophobia can be placed in both. On the other hand, as with most phobias, scopophobia generally arises from a traumatic event in the person's life. With scopophobia, it is likely that the person was subjected to public ridicule as a child. Additionally, a person suffering from scopophobia may often be the subject to public staring, possibly due to a deformity or physical ailment.[sup][2][/sup]

According to the Social Phobia/Social Anxiety Association, U.S. government data for 2012 suggests that social anxiety affects over 7% of the population at any given time. Stretched over a lifetime, the percentage increases to 13%.[sup][10][/sup]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scopophobia

[AnthroHeart]

I have a bit of social phobia. Though I don't mind being with my friend. But it's hard being even with my mom.

Crowds really scatter my energy field.

[Plenum]

thanks Bluebell!  I didn't know there was a word for it,  but that is very relevant to my situation.

I had a laugh at one of the treatment options

With one option, desensitization, the patient is stared at for a prolonged period and then describes their feelings. The hope is that the individual will either be desensitized to being stared at or will discover the root of their scopophobia.

but hey, maybe I will find the root of the phobia via a memory that I buried.

"With scopophobia, it is likely that the person was subjected to public ridicule as a child."

[AnthroHeart]

If staring can bust clouds, imagine what it can do to one's body.

[tsh]

my job entails standing in front of people. yet, i still have not gotten used to it. i dislike being the focus of attention

[Aion]

I work in a restaurant and we cook right out where everyone can watch and it can get a little unnerving having people stare at you as though that is going to cook their meal faster but eh.

[AnthroHeart]

I'm on disability now (paid 100% for first 3 months), because the anxieties and bi-polar of my schizoaffective became too much. It's not so much different although I don't have to really talk to people on the phone now. I have some slight depression as well, but it's a strange depression. Only parallel lives seem to lift my mood.

[sunnysideup]

I pretty much share the same anxieties, Plen. I consider myself really shy and so I used to make up all kinds of excuses to get out of having to give a presentation for school or work. Being the centre of attention sets off a lot of emotions in me and can be quite overwhelming. Over the years practice has made it a bit better, but I still struggle with it. I've also found that when I experience an extreme case of this emotional build up, that there's a defence mechanism that kicks in. A sort of out of body-ish experience, like looking at the situation from a third person point of view and where my body is on auto-pilot.

[Sabou]

I also share this anxiety, it started in grade 7 when I was in front of the class reading from a bible and I am not sure what triggered it, but my voice started shaking and it just got worse and worse and I read through the rest of my section with a noticeable shaky voice and then from then on I was scared to give presentations. I have been dealing with it ever since. I have other social anxiety as well that all seemed to start at about this time, being more aware of my surroundings and what people were thinking at 12 years old.

[Shemaya]

Yes, really bad.

I have done teaching in front of a group a few times, but the anxiety leading up to it is awful. Once there, I can make it through. I don't think my anxiety comes across significantly. But the fear-avoidance has really been holding me back.

I have been thinking about this quite a bit the last week.

I am currently in a yin yoga immersion, and have to teach for the certification.

[Stranger]

Fear of public speaking is the most common fear in the US, and the same is probably true of the rest of the world. I can share one experience that was quite interesting related to that. I had to tell a large group of people about myself in a professional setting. I was anxious and wanted to prepare notes, but as things worked out, had no time to do so. So I focused on the fact that they were all other-selves, just me underneath their individual forms. I also focused on the fact they were only God in their essence, and I know that God loves me. Therefore it didn't matter what they expressed - in truth it was only God looking at me, and I have no need to either impress or fear God because God already knows me better than I know myself. I ended up feeling as if I was speaking to a roomful of close friends. Speaking became very easy, spontaneous and natural, and I got incredibly and unusually positive feedback.

Also: every fear can be conquered by simply doing the thing you're afraid of. It's called "exposure". I know someone who was very shy, but ended up working soliciting donations from strangers on the street. Her confidence increased dramatically in just one summer.

[isis]

I had this problem until I reached high school. In 9th grade I ended up getting in a geography class that was predominantly male juniors & seniors. I was happy with the circumstances I found myself in until I realized we had to give a presentation every friday. If I did poorly they would boo at me & if I said something nervous-sounding they would mock me & then laugh hysterically. It was a nightmare but eventually I got surprisingly good at it to where they couldn't boo/mock/laugh/etc. In college I was thankful for that class that got me okay with public speaking bc it was required in practically every class I took. To this day it doesn't bother me much, thanks to that class, but I only enjoy it if I'm drunk.

[Billy]

Cannot do it.

[Matt1]

I have played on Stage a lot before and don't really mind it, its no such a big deal for me. Ultimately any adverse thoughts and emotions brought on by a social experience are by the individual experiencing it, even if you have a hostile crowd , it is the way we uniquely react that creates the effect.

[Bluebell]

thanks Bluebell!  I didn't know there was a word for it,  but that is very relevant to my situation.

I had a laugh at one of the treatment options

With one option, desensitization, the patient is stared at for a prolonged period and then describes their feelings. The hope is that the individual will either be desensitized to being stared at or will discover the root of their scopophobia.

but hey, maybe I will find the root of the phobia via a memory that I buried.

"With scopophobia, it is likely that the person was subjected to public ridicule as a child."

i have accumulated trauma all through life of that kind. so i'd probably go for desensitization over trying to remember every time i was laughed at  but if it's one incident maybe hypnosis can help u remember, or asking childhood friends & parents. i've found my friends & family have such different memories to mine, it might be illuminating to hear their side.

[isis]

My best friend was the Valedictorian of my class & her speech was awful bc her voice was so incredibly shaky. Since she was my other half multiple people approached me afterwards & were like, "Her voice was so shaky..." then I'd just smile & be like, "Yeah..." then we'd have a laugh about it. I wish I could get my hands on a recording of it...seriously might be the worst Valedictorian speech ever given.

It was odd to me that she did such a terrible job bc she was the kind of person that loved attention. I guess the crowd was too big for her liking.

[JerryF]

Fear of public speaking is the most common fear in the US, and the same is probably true of the rest of the world.  I can share one experience that was quite interesting related to that.  I had to tell a large group of people about myself in a professional setting.  I was anxious and wanted to prepare notes, but as things worked out, had no time to do so.  So I focused on the fact that they were all other-selves, just me underneath their individual forms.  I also focused on the fact they were only God in their essence, and I know that God loves me.  Therefore it didn't matter what they expressed - in truth it was only God looking at me, and I have no need to either impress or fear God because God already knows me better than I know myself.  I ended up feeling as if I was speaking to a roomful of close friends.  Speaking became very easy, spontaneous and natural, and I got incredibly and unusually positive feedback.

Thanks for sharing that idea on how to apply the concept of oneness to overcome public speaking anxiety.

As a young student, my public speaking phobia got to the point of refusing to speak in front of class.  Instead, I would choose to receive an F grade for any assignment that required speaking in front of the class.

Being a musician and performing on stage helped overcome the shyness.

One way to build speaking confidence is to speak with others about a subject with which one is passionate and well informed, perhaps speaking with individuals at first, and then expanding on that.

I now do tutoring of small groups of young music students.  It started out with giving individual music lessons.  This will probably develop into speaking in front of larger groups.

One of the messages that Brene Brown (author of Daring Greatly) preaches is “Dare to be seen.”  I prefer the version that goes “Dare to be seen and heard.”

[Alexis]

Yes and no. I actually enjoyed doing drama and doing some stage performances in high school - I guess in those circumstances I feel like the eyes are on my character, it wasn't me as I was being someone else. The words weren't exactly mine but I could pretend that they were and add emotion to it.
Speeches or any other sort of public talking, is something I dreaded at school but I think it has a lot to do with my own feelings of unworthiness. I remember having a few disruptive classmates that didn't make standing in front of the class any easier and I also remember a teacher go off the rails at a group presentation I was involved in - I don't remember the specifics, maybe it wasn't long enough. Which also reminds me of another teacher who yelled but that traumatic experience is slightly off topic, and I still have issues with it.

Edit
Actually I will add it but keep it on topic. You have to understand that during this part of my life, my father was terminally ill with cancer in his brain. This particular teacher came into most oh classes in a foul mood. We were learning about cpr and we had to demonstrate it with a partner in front of the class. I was called up first and I didnt even get to do the actual cpr because I only squeezed one of my friends hands instead of both, and this teacher went off her rails about me doing it wrong. It really shook me up and still has damaged my confidence. I remember one day I had to call emergency services because my father was having a seizure and his face turned purple, the operator instructed me to do Cpr but I couldn't do it, I just froze up. My father didn't die from that, luckily he did start breathing. But the thought of being in that situation again makes me anxious.

[Diana]

I do dislike being at the center of attention, I tend to lurk in shadows. But it's not a fear just something I tend to avoid.

This is how I feel. I have always gravitated to the periphery of everything, though paradoxically I seem to draw attention. I'm an odd combination of introvert and extravert. My tendency is to be an observer, but when I am engaged in a situation or group or event, I embrace it and immerse. 

I don't like public speaking because of my tendency to be just an observer with people. Speaking is different than performing I think. In martial arts, we did demos and I performed in a group and solo. I was nervous before the performance, but not at all when I actually performed, which seems backwards. 

One thing about public speaking: It's like everything else. If you do it a lot, you get better at it and less anxiety is attached to it. I always found that when I had to speak publicly, I was nervous at first, but after speaking a while my voice calmed down and at that point I started to enjoy it.

Jim Morrison said:

Expose yourself to your deepest fear;
After that, fear has no power;
And the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes.
You are free.