The Quest for a Soulmate

[Monica]

So true.

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Well said.

[W1981]

Thanks for the thread plenum. I been at it (searching for a mate/soulmate) for about 9 years now. I accept my part of blame, that is, during the previous 8 years I had been more or less in a depression mode that was just getting from bad to worse. i just read your thread about blockages and can identify more than I like to aknowledge on that list that had plagued me for all these years. in the last year i have been removing them bit by bit and now just find myself blocked in just a couple that have to do with social issues and being part of a group. I been trying to fix these for a while and the work is being done but my social skills are indeed limited. I blame me for that but again I forgive myself and I'm attending to it.

On the other hand I find myself in situations were there are very few people I can talk with, let alone connect. I am trying to be accepting of all of them and normally analyse their behaviour towards me and if I find that I can't put up with certain people I simply avoid interaction, however, this is rare.

What I am surprised about is the fact that my surroundings almost constantly lack open minded people who are willing to just talk intellectually or w/e, wether it be about politics, science, spirituality or anything that comes to mind. This, I cannot explain!

In the quest for a soulmate/mate then, since one would have to at least be able to sustain an intellectual conversation, i find myself losing the battle simply because I don't come accross people who can start and maintain decent conversations. I cannot figure out if this is my limitation or others', but hey, I guess I'll learn.

[Shin'Ar]

twin flames are NOT soul mates. soul mate is a person of one incarnation. twin flames, when meeting, can be amazing, they can be difficult.

Oceania has revealed the misnomer.

Let us realize that we are not this present identity of temporary flesh. This is a temporary incarnation and any mate within it will not be related to our next life's experience, or previous; although that is not impossible.

We are ancient. We are consciousness, not bound to flesh. It is not logical to suggest that there is another consciousness that is somehow attached to our own lengthy experiences of thousands or millions of years. Would that not infringe upon the free will and choice of such a consciousness; to be somehow affixed to the experience that I create? I would not want to be such a being; to have to follow the exploits of another being throughout all of existence dependent on their experience.

No my friends, our soul mates are unlimited and share with us in such intimate ways that in the sharing we create this universe and all that resides within it. How could some twin soul be any more intimate than that which we have already shared with so many other fields of consciousness?

I believe the term soulmate originates in teachings that have long been corrupted, as are many teachings, and I believe it refers to what the Torah speaks of as the shadow that is born with a person.

(Psalms 39:7).
"When [the body] issues forth into the world this shadow is immediately present with it and participates with it, and they grow together. This is as said: "Surely every man walks in his shadow" All the days of the life of a person are present in this shadow."

There many legends which refer to this shadow that accompanies a person through each incarnation. Many modern teachings refer to it as our guardian angel. Of course these teachings are, as I said, perverted and corrupted by years of misinterpretation.

[Ruth]

I found this description of the bobcat totem and it is eerily accurate for us - my hubby and myself.

http://www.linsdomain.com/totems/pages/bobcat.htm

Monica - I can often see things through the eyes of another, but have never had the intensity of experience I did with my "twin flame".

And just to be clear - I am only using the terms "soul mate" and "twin flame" for lack of anything better. I am calling a "soul mate" any person I've met in my life with whom I believe I have shared experiences in a previous incarnation. The "twin flame" monniker is - in my usage - a single person that I believe to be a part of myself.

Catalyst: The whole twin flame experience has been (is) one of the most powerful catalysts I've had to deal with in this life. I thought I was done with it. But since I ran into him last year, have spoken about the experience here (and I never discussed the experience after "closing the door" until now), have come across some of the correspondence between us unexpectedly (I wasn't consciously looking for it, and actually thought I had destroyed it) and have had a couple of other related experiences, I have come to realize that I had never really completely released this experience and it has been making me sick.

I had never forgiven us for not being ready for each other, and was shutting myself down for not being ready now that he is.

There are several active threads on bring4th at the moment, and I have received several PM's, that have all worked together to help me really deal with this catalyst and relieve myself of the sickness it has been causing in me. Too many threads to list here, but this is one of them.

Thank you, my brothers and sisters, for your help!

Love and light!

[Diana]

@ Ruth: that's awesome!

[Ankh]

I have a "best friend" soul mate like this. We keep in touch. We have a few times out of year when we sit and talk for hours. But when it comes to living in the world, we go our separate ways. Lol, we annoy each other so much at the same time we work together so well. Sometimes I think it's because we know one another so well, it's difficult to put on our IRL hats.

You know what... I resonate with that. There is one person in my vicinity, who makes me uncomfortable. I don't know him so well, but the first time I saw him I recognized him in a way that I have never recognized anyone before. So, at first, I was convinced that we have met each other before, or seen each other at some place, but not remember it. So I questioned him about where he has worked and where he has lived, but none of these places have I been at. Today, every time he is around I feel "fake". (Not the right word I am looking for, but something like that.) He makes me feel not as I am supposed to be, or should be, or something like that... Every time I look at him, I am at loss. Because I swear that I know him so well, and yet, there is like this confusing reality that I experience, in which we play, and in that reality we dance this strange dance of not knowing each other, and by that it feels so fake... Like it's not supposed to be that way...

[godwide_void]

I can say with absolute certainty that I've found my Twin Flame. She balances me out, completes me, and our personalities contrast and are alike in just the right places and in the right amounts. Before meeting, our life experiences had very similar themes to them in vastly differing circumstances, and we were both the 'loner outcasts' in High School when we met. She was the only person I'd ever felt such an immense connection to and felt drawn towards to such a degree that she was the first person I actually actively 'pursued'. It seems nothing can put a dent in our bond either. Now we're at a point where we can share the silence together and be completely at peace and joy, and though she's unawakened, she is one of the most awakened and pure minds I've met, and is one of the most caring souls I've come across. I also had the fellow who did my density/planetary origin reading for me confirm that she is indeed my Twin Flame. I acknowledge her as being the physical manifestation of the love of the One Creator in my life.

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We're also prone to many, many, many instances of telepathic happenings. I usually tell her "OUR SOULS ARE MERGING!" when they occur, and while she perceives it as a joke... deep down I know such a thing isn't a joke.

[Aaron]

I can say with absolute certainty that I've found my Twin Flame. She balances me out, completes me, and our personalities contrast and are alike in just the right places and in the right amounts. Before meeting, our life experiences had very similar themes to them in vastly differing circumstances, and we were both the 'loner outcasts' in High School when we met. She was the only person I'd ever felt such an immense connection to and felt drawn towards to such a degree that she was the first person I actually actively 'pursued'. It seems nothing can put a dent in our bond either. Now we're at a point where we can share the silence together and be completely at peace and joy, and though she's unawakened, she is one of the most awakened and pure minds I've met, and is one of the most caring souls I've come across. I also had the fellow who did my density/planetary origin reading for me confirm that she is indeed my Twin Flame. I acknowledge her as being the physical manifestation of the love of the One Creator in my life.

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We're also prone to many, many, many instances of telepathic happenings. I usually tell her "OUR SOULS ARE MERGING!" when they occur, and while she perceives it as a joke... deep down I know such a thing isn't a joke.

What a miracle...

[Oceania]

i've met someone that's my twin in many ways and contrasts me in other ways... this leads to to wonder. but i was thinking twin flames have this incredible pull toward each other. i don't experience any pull other than, it just feels right. but what does it mean?

[3DMonkey]

Shout out to all the babies in the world.

My kiddos are my soulmates ... Purely sincere. Purely logical.

[Ruth]

i've met someone that's my twin in many ways and contrasts me in other ways... this leads to to wonder. but i was thinking twin flames have this incredible pull toward each other. i don't experience any pull other than, it just feels right. but what does it mean?

I think only you can decide what it means. I have found that it takes time, some "investigating," and some honest introspection to decide. Personally, I only use the twin flame vs soulmate monnikers to differientate between two types of experiences I have had. Basically, I think it is all catalyst as we are, ultimately, all one with the Creator.

That said, I LITERALLY bumped into the "twin flame" I've mentioned when on my travels this past week. It gave me the opportunity to deliver the forgiveness I've found lately live and in person. Very interesting experience for me.

[Oceania]

i just know i've never met anyone who is like me in the ways that matter a lot to me in this life. so i take that seriously.

[Ankh]

I've had this romantic idea, and perhaps I still do, that there exists this one mate for me. *My* mate. I know how stupid this idea is, because I also understand that seeking the Creator is what is important. I wish seriously and only to become one with the Creator, and to be in this *union with the Creator*. When it's done, I would care less if I would be alone, or with *the* mate, or *a* mate.

Until *that* union occurs though, I still have this stupid, romantic idea of meeting *the* mate, when I will have the lightnings shooting out of my brain, telling me: "Wwwooooaaaa! I didn't think that *he* was incarnated!"

[Oceania]

i'm poly so i like the idea of many loves.

[Monica]

I've had this romantic idea, and perhaps I still do, that there exists this one mate for me. *My* mate. I know how stupid this idea is, because I also understand that seeking the Creator is what is important. I wish seriously and only to become one with the Creator, and to be in this *union with the Creator*. When it's done, I would care less if I would be alone, or with *the* mate, or *a* mate.

Until *that* union occurs though, I still have this stupid, romantic idea of meeting *the* mate, when I will have the lightnings shooting out of my brain, telling me: "Wwwooooaaaa! I didn't think that *he* was incarnated!"

I don't think that's stupid at all. Maybe you feel that way because you know that person is out there somewhere, and when the time is right, you will meet. You probably already agreed to it on the soul level.

Suggestion: Try simultaneously releasing any attachment to finding your mate, while also being proactive to attracting him. (Send out the signal psychically.) Key here is to simultaneously release and create; create without attachment.

[Ruth]

I've had this romantic idea, and perhaps I still do, that there exists this one mate for me. *My* mate. I know how stupid this idea is, because I also understand that seeking the Creator is what is important. I wish seriously and only to become one with the Creator, and to be in this *union with the Creator*. When it's done, I would care less if I would be alone, or with *the* mate, or *a* mate.

Until *that* union occurs though, I still have this stupid, romantic idea of meeting *the* mate, when I will have the lightnings shooting out of my brain, telling me: "Wwwooooaaaa! I didn't think that *he* was incarnated!"

I don't think that your idea is stupid at all Ankh. Keep yourself open to the possibility! I can't wait for you to tell us that you've found each other.

[3DMonkey]

I've had this romantic idea, and perhaps I still do, that there exists this one mate for me. *My* mate. I know how stupid this idea is, because I also understand that seeking the Creator is what is important. I wish seriously and only to become one with the Creator, and to be in this *union with the Creator*. When it's done, I would care less if I would be alone, or with *the* mate, or *a* mate.

Until *that* union occurs though, I still have this stupid, romantic idea of meeting *the* mate, when I will have the lightnings shooting out of my brain, telling me: "Wwwooooaaaa! I didn't think that *he* was incarnated!"

That doesn't happen. No wonder Ra is your most suitable mate. ( a throwback to the treehouse)

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I wrote that before reading the subsequent posts. I agree with you. It is stupid.

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Like, when you wanted to have fun on a vacation, did you hope the perfect vacation would manifest and you would say "I can't believe this vacation even existed? Or did you set out on a trip and say "I'm going to make the vacation the best ever!". You're in the driver's seat, me lady.

[Monica]

Like, when you wanted to have fun on a vacation, did you hope the perfect vacation would manifest and you would say "I can't believe this vacation even existed? Or did you set out on a trip and say "I'm going to make the vacation the best ever!". You're in the driver's seat, me lady.

A momentous occasion! I actually agree with this part!

I had a boyfriend who had his 'perfect mate' all figured out: She would be gorgeous of course, have red hair, like hard rock music, concerts and tennis, be articulate and intelligent, a good cook, smart but not smarter than him of course, always cheerful, etc.

He never found her. Last I heard, he's pushing 60 and still lonely.

Having criteria doesn't work. The 'perfect mate' is the one who will stimulate the most spiritual growth and with whom one can have a fulfilling life.

So the only criteria to have is that.

NOT saying you have criteria, Ankh. I don't know if you do or not. Just sharing. I agree with Monkey about making the choice to find fulfillment and happiness with whatever the Universe brings to you. THEN you will find that 'perfect mate' I think.

[Steppingfeet]

Listening to an audiobook version of Tolle's "The Power of Now" while in the car this morning.

He puts an idea forward I love. Paraphrased it goes:

"Relationships are not designed to make you happy, they are designed to make you conscious."

[Ankh]

I so love this place!!

Monica and Ruth, thank you for your answers!!

3DMonkey, I laughed and laughed and laughed... "That doesn't happen. No wonder Ra is your most suitable mate. ( a throwback to the treehouse)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I wrote that before reading the subsequent posts. I agree with you. It is stupid. " LOL!!! /

[Oceania]

you can have criteria. the thing is you gotta go about it the right way.

[Monica]

you can have criteria. the thing is you gotta go about it the right way.

Well I'm not saying it's 'wrong' to have a wish list of desired attributes. Some things really do need to be on the criteria list, like on a spiritual path for example. but that's a pretty loose generalization. Wishing for someone who doesn't smoke and is on a spiritual path is some very loose criteria, and acceptable, in my opinion. But wishing for someone of a specific race, color of hair, height, weight, etc. are all rather superficial, in my opinion, and it's those superficial kinds of criteria that can get in the way.

I happen to like long hair on guys. You know, the rock star look. Well instead I got someone with the leather-jacket biker look, with short hair. (though he has had long hair before.) He thought he'd get an Asian martial artist woman. Instead he got me, a short blonde who was totally sedentary at the time. Our interests and personalities were drastically different!

But guess what? We turned to to be perfect for each other! Sometimes when we let go of attachments to what we think we want, we get something better!

[Oceania]

well i figure if someone wants a certain looking person that's ok.

[Ankh]

Criteria list:

1. One Infinite Creator

2. *THE* mate/Ra student

3. Diligent Ra student

4. Rather be alone

[Monica]

Criteria list:

1. One Infinite Creator

2. *THE* mate/Ra student

3. Diligent Ra student

4. Rather be alone

Someone can be a student of the Law of One, without ever having heard of the Law of One.

[Ankh]

Just read the following on Facebook:

"Consistently jumping in and out of relationships can prove to be unhealthy when wanting to manifest the type of relationship your heart truly desires. When you leave one relationship for the next, you carry with you the energy and vibration of the previous relationship, reason why it is important to take some time between relationships to clear the previous vibration/energy of the last one. Sometimes one may have to work around his/her vibration of what an ideal mate is, the characteristics of this person, how he/she would desire to be treated, how he/she would desire to treat other person, re defining what an ideal relationship and partner is, usually it is for the most part the opposite of what one previously experienced. It will be helpful to leave the negative vibration behind and take only the positive experiences and lessons learnt from those experiences forward. Both negative and positive experiences can positively serve you. Negative situations by shifting your perspective of what you experienced, learning something meaningful, now using that experience to elevate and strengthen you. So as you clear your vibration around relationships, a partner etc., you will be able to attract into your life someone who matches the desires of your heart. Keep in mind the clearer the vibration; the more pristine that version of a mate you will be manifest into your life, so hold a clear vision into what you desire." ~ Narda Mohammed"

[Oceania]

you also have to love yourself to attract a mate that treats you well.

[Ankh]

you also have to love yourself to attract a mate that treats you well.

In my experience that is not always true. There are human beings upon this planet who will love you and treat you well no matter how much you despise yourself.

But I agree that love for the self is a very beautiful thing.

[Oceania]

i think to attract a twinflame and be ready for them, you have to love yourself truly. at this point i love myself yes but i don't like myself.

[Monica]

Keep in mind the clearer the vibration; the more pristine that version of a mate you will be manifest into your life, so hold a clear vision into what you desire."

I think I need to clarify what I said earlier. Holding a clear vision of the essence of the desired mate, ie. qualities such as aspiring to a spiritual path, having an open heart, or at least being ready to open their heart, having good communication skills or at least ready to develop them, being well-matched to ourselves in terms of strength of mind and spirit, and most importantly, having those qualities which will bring out the best qualities in ourselves, for a mutually satisfying relationship leading to strong spiritual evolution for BOTH partners, is all good. Yes, absolutely, hold that vision!

When I said I didn't recommend having specific criteria, I wasn't referring to those sorts of things. Those are all attributes, and it's not only acceptable, in my opinion, but advisable to focus on attracting those attributes.

Rather, what I was referring to earlier by "specific criteria" was superficial stuff like color of hair, style of clothing, height, weight, race, taste in books, movies, music or other recreation, or even choice of spiritual path. All those are, in my opinion, superficial and can get in the way of attracting the qualities that are truly important.

Even choice of spiritual path can be a superficial attachment. Suppose one is a Buddhist and has the criteria of attracting a Buddhist mate. But what if their ideal mate is a Pagan, and they are each able to offer to the other what the other needs for balanced perspective?

What if, for example, the ideal mate is someone who is in the process of expanding their knowledge of Law of One concepts, but has never actually heard of Ra or the Law of One books? I have often told the story of a friend of mine who is a Bible-believing Christian, but NOT an evangelical Christian; rather, he is a Universalist Christian, which is a relatively new denomination that believes in the 'salvation' of ALL, eventually. Their beliefs are so radical to conventional Christianity that they're considered a cult by them.

But this young man, in my estimation, understood the concepts of the Law of One perhaps better than anyone I'd ever met. My speculation is that he is a Wanderer, who chose to incarnate in the Christian community, in order to reach out to those who are ready to advance their thinking. He is able to do that by using the Bible as a template, or oracle, in much the same way as we might use the Tarot.

I'm just using him as an example of someone who, at first glance, might not fit the criteria of being a Law of One student, but who could possibly be a very stimulating and even formidable partner for some young woman who is a Law of One student. I knew him only by email correspondence, and he's young enough to be my son, but I was astounded at the depth of his understanding! I offer this as an illustration of what I mean by some people not seeming to meet the criteria, but actually offering gifts that one might not have even considered.