Am I a Nihilist Athiest Spiritualist?

[Shemaya]

That, what...Tortures, rapes, bombs, and destroys others in all ways, sometimes for fun?
.

I don't condone the method with approval as much as I do with powerlessness.  Its the same thing in this world.

I'm okay with veils as the reason.  I'm still not okay with the extent of bs that happens to some while here.

 Me neither

Animal factory farming, human genetic experimentation, child sex and labor slavery, rape and torture for decades at a time.

Its a lot.  For the name of anything.  And souls just go along with it, like a game.

Am I not supposed to be disturbed?

Hi TTP, these are my thoughts.

If you are opening your heart to universal love, you are supposed to be disturbed, imo.  You are supposed to be moved emotionally and take that kinetic energy and do something with it.

It's the only way, that we as creators of our society and civilization, are going to create a positive 4D.  By taking action to make it happen.

Souls that want a positive 4D society/ social memory complex are not okay with the abuse, torture, and brutal violence of the current 3D experience.  We live in a time when some souls will choose to experience a loving environment and some will choose to continue to live in a negative, abusive, disharmonious world.  Which would you choose?

If you choose the latter, you don't have to do anything, just stay the same and leave things as they are. There was a story last year about Spring break in Florida where a crowd of onlookers watched some guys gang rape a woman on the beach.  That's an example of people accepting the negative experience. IMO, a positive being would do something to stop the violation and crime that was happening.  What do you think?

If you choose the positive experience, that means expanding radiantly forward, working through energetic obstacles within yourself and helping others do the same.  it starts with yourself and your family and relationships, and the incorporates communities and society at large.  There are obstacles and blockages within all these levels and anytime you clear something within yourself, your are helping us all as a SMC move forward.  Anytime you take action out of love, compassion, connection to others you are helping to create the positive experience we desire.

I think the point is just that, to have a beautiful, harmonious, diverse world  to play and enjoy and love and be free, together.  With freedom from oppression and disharmony and without violation of ourselves or others.

[Jade]

I think veiled systems are too slow and allow for more suffering than is necessary. To a point its wasted experience, like providing the same punch to a punching bag for the infinith tume. What the hell is left to learn for the punching bag??!

Ra actually says the opposite, that the lack of a veil led to stagnation and the introduction of the veil sped up spiritual development. I think the reason it works is because there is much less opportunity to waste experience - everything causes catalyst. There is infinite service to perform. It's not like that without a veil.

The punching bag learns how to take a punch better, and how to teach other punching bags how to be tougher, too. Also, what else is a punching bag going to do with itself other than fulfill its destiny?

The archetypes have lots of clues to why choosing to polarize is important. More info regarding the Experience of the Mind:

94.12 Questioner: It seems to me that the Experience of the Mind would act in such a way as to change the nature of the veil so that catalyst would be filtered so as to be more acceptable in the bias that is increasingly chosen by the entity. For instance, if the entity had chosen the right-hand path the Experience of the Mind would change the permeability of the veil to accept more and more positive catalyst, and also the other would be true for accepting more negative if the left-hand path were the one that was repeatedly chosen. Is this correct?

Ra: I am Ra. This is not only correct but there is a further ramification. As the entity increases in experience it shall, more and more, choose positive interpretations of catalyst if it is upon the service-to-others path and negative interpretations of catalyst if its experience has been along the service-to-self path.

95.20 Questioner: For the condition of the meeting after the veiling process, either entity will choose, as a function of its previous biases or shall I say, will choose as a function of Card Four, the Experience, the way in which it will approach or handle the situation with respect to polarity, therefore producing, most probably, more catalyst for itself along the chosen path of polarization. Would Ra comment on that statement?

Ra: I am Ra. This statement is correct.

95.23 Questioner: What I meant to say was that the entity is guarded along the right-hand path, once it is chosen, from effects of the material illusion that are of a negative polarity. Would Ra comment on that?

Ra: I am Ra. This is an accurate perception of our intent, O student. We may note that the great cat guards in direct proportion to the purity of the manifestations of intention and the purity of inner work done along this path.

95.24 Questioner: From that statement I interpret the following meaning: That if the Experience of the Mind has sufficiently chosen the right-hand path, as total purity is approached in choosing of the right-hand path, then total imperviousness from the effect of the left-hand catalyst is also approached. Is this correct?

Ra: I am Ra. This is exquisitely perceptive. The seeker which has purely chosen the service-to-others path shall certainly not have a variant apparent incarnational experience. There is no outward shelter in your illusion from the gusts, flurries, and blizzards of quick and cruel catalyst.

However, to the pure, all that is encountered speaks of the love and the light of the One Infinite Creator. The cruelest blow is seen with an ambiance of challenges offered and opportunities to come. Thusly, the great pitch of light is held high above such an one so that all interpretation may be seen to be protected by light.

[Infinite Unity]

I am The Creator.

[Infinite Unity]

I/We Create all the mental, physical, spiritual Levels of reality, that are but mirrors that placed/organized in such and such ways to create realities. Of course it is a lot deeper then this. However this is a sufficient enough concept to do work in 3d.

[Aion]

Okay I don't think everyone understands my concern.

Its hard to explain because it extends past 3D.

Infinity has infinite suffering and pleasure as far as I'm aware from the concept of infinity applied within a 3D space/time-time/space setting, Aion, so neither/both.

The Archetypes are helpful but they are not to me, a validation for the suffering created by trying to understand them.  (Persona shattering, loss of mental faculties, insanity)

There also is no true mission beyond evolution.  The Convulution begins tthere.  I dont even know how to go there.

My concern extends to Infinity, the Self of infinity.

We live in a perspective of seperation.  So powerful can this suffrage achievable here damage a soul self that 'healing' takes decades of Our 'miniscule scale of linear time concepts'.  So strange and different it forces souls into situations that even they beyond 3D space/time didn't desire.
Is that place too a game?  Is 6D, the next octave, the prior octave, a game?

What if I don't want to play ANY of that game anymore?

What's up with spirituality being used to make very real suffering acceptable?  I couldn't accept suffering being inflicted to me so I can't accept it upon others.  I feel very bad for them, I can't even imagine their misery.

This isn't a good game at that ppoint.  It doesn't matter if its in 3D, 6D, Octave 2 or Octave 3, sub-octave 997, it didn't/doesn't/won't matter to me.

A temporary persona exists as a self aware 3D vehicle.  It suffers to teach the soul driving it,sometimes intentionally against their will by their own soul/higher will.  Even to the point of ending the perceived 'only-life' of that persona.

Its.  Disturbing.  Why am I the only one who sees that even all as one still doesn't separate the reality of what they do to 3D beings to learn/evolve?  All is one?  Then suffering is created and taken and desired by parts of the one upon other parts of the one, like raping yourself because it feels good.

I get such convulutions as wanting thus enjoying negative or occurrence that are vampyric, leach-like, or controlling.

But I get those who actually want it getting it.  I don't get why those who don't want it still get it but then are told they have free will to choose, and even pick a bit.  While in actuality; that being the way they actually percieve reality, its not consistent as such.  Then all these reasons and mechanics.  And the human persona is basically just at that point despite being self aware:

A collection of prewritten scripts and animations.

How am I 'free' again?  I'm in a class I've no memory signing up for, in a place that does as it pleases then calls me the creator of those pleasures including the suffering and torment of others like me exactly.

While I've no say myself.

The contradictions of logic are my concern.  Its to such a degree I'm a nihilist spiritualist athiest, that makes no sense in and of itself as a descriptory title ;~;

But that's the only understanding I've so far.  As far as my experience versus belief goes.

There is no God above or below or here, Its all Me, and I am not God here.
I believe in the Law of One.
There is no clear point to existence beyond evolution, thus there is currently to I, no point that explains why.  The creator desired to know itself, to reexperience itself.  Why?  What's the point?  You already are, why does it need to be so vivid and constantly more as if addicted to self?

I don't get it.

I think you are having a close encounter with what Ra calls the 'Law of Responsibility'.

[Shemaya]

What if I don't want to play ANY of that game anymore?

What's up with spirituality being used to make very real suffering acceptable?  I couldn't accept suffering being inflicted to me so I can't accept it upon others.  I feel very bad for them, I can't even imagine their misery.




I think you are having a close encounter with what Ra calls the 'Law of Responsibility'.

 Yes, I agree.

Do what you can to help the suffering.

Karma is now responsibility, and this society and civilization and SMC is our responsibility

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

I'd agree with that too.  I am somewhat irresponsible in various ways that I am hoping to flesh out soon enough.  I hope.

I suppose I should meditate on this and then contemplate on it.  Hah.  I do polarize actively at work every day.  Though not nearly as much as I used to now.

But I agree, it's a quiet part of the reason I work graveyard shifts, to avoid things.  But the odd thing that does come about I can effectively use to try and polarize, if not just be myself and honest, or try to just make a person smile.  Random compliments on clothes sometimes work, jewelry usually does too, I love jewelry so I compliment it often, since it too is also alive.

But I can't handle a lot at once. It's not anxiety, it's like I just get rigid and turn hollow, and now I'm a mask of myself.  Because otherwise I'd just be kind of bouncy with everything I do, since I always have my own soundtracks going on in my head, kind of like an internal song you hum and 'che' sound to??  Beat box style maybe?  I don't know how to describe it but I just don't do it anymore.  I can't let all of that in and try to make sense of it.  It gets rough.

So I guess I'm an introvert who likes to be alone a lot because I've been alone most of my life.  Now I'm sitting here like, 'crap, how do I help but not have to deal with tons of people and social gatherings??'

So uh.

Suggestions for the oblivious I?  My main idea was to meditate often, often and a lot and basically spending a lot of time visualizing and balancing, and then trying to balance the entire pains I feel about the world, in order to aid the social memory complex in forgiveness and continuance of it into 4D more smoothly.

I need to learn how to meditate to noise, there's no comfortable quiet place in my area except a car, and it's not exactly a comfy meditation spot...  And all the parks in my neighborhood 'close' after 10pm, and police do patrol my neighborhood so I can't exactly sit in one for too long, plus when I've tried the paranoia got me whenever a car would drive by.

So I've got some handling of my thoughts to do first before I get into any real deep meditations for visualizations and balancing.

I had a system of balancing a while back.  Where you recall various individual memories, attune them to the chakras they resonate with, then balance it across the spectrum and then go back to the memory and forgive it before moving to the next thought or memory.  Along the way you can record each memory and it's chakra associations and build a kind of mind-chakra tree grid in a journal if you really want to try mapping out the way your thoughts move from one memory to another and the chakras that ping your mind to pull those memories up.

But, suggestions still desired
Thank you for all the current ones thus far!

[AnthroHeart]

Ha, going into 4D sounds like a misnomer because you have to die to get there.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

With sparse other options to get there.

[Jade]

Hi TTP, when someone says they get worn out easily doing heart-chakra work, to me that says that the lower chakras need some help. Manually clearing your chakras (visualize them spinning and bright, clear) can really help. Discovering and working on those lower blockages is important before the heart can pump out energy at a satisfactory rate.

As far as meditating when there is noise, that is a challenge. Earplugs or just even something around the ears to muffle most of the noise should help.

But really, I think your first step is making peace with your incarnation and fueling your desire to be here. This is red ray work. If you are angry at the collective Creation, you have a blockage in the root. Any strong desires or fantasies about death or leaving your incarnation can lead to root chakra blockages. This needs to be gently worked which may take some time. When you had your full capacities, you chose to incarnate here. You knew full well the risks and how dirty it was. In fact, chances are, things could probably be worse (I think one of the last Q'uo channelings in 2008 mentions that our vibrations are much higher than anticipated already). But each time we keep our chin up and look for love, we double each effort previous. Sometimes that's enough to encourage me to keep going. Everything helps. Just being here helps. Every step we taking beyond being into doing helps a little more. There are no "others" who are suffering. You are suffering. If you can ease your own suffering, the others' suffering will be eased, as well. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but the first is: stop the suffering within.

[AnthroHeart]

I keep Jasper and Carnelian stones in my pocket to keep my lower 2 chakras balanced. My 3rd chakra is probably another I could get a stone for but it's a bit too far away from my pockets for the stone to probably work.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

Hi TTP, when someone says they get worn out easily doing heart-chakra work, to me that says that the lower chakras need some help. Manually clearing your chakras (visualize them spinning and bright, clear) can really help. Discovering and working on those lower blockages is important before the heart can pump out energy at a satisfactory rate.

As far as meditating when there is noise, that is a challenge. Earplugs or just even something around the ears to muffle most of the noise should help.

But really, I think your first step is making peace with your incarnation and fueling your desire to be here. This is red ray work. If you are angry at the collective Creation, you have a blockage in the root. Any strong desires or fantasies about death or leaving your incarnation can lead to root chakra blockages. This needs to be gently worked which may take some time. When you had your full capacities, you chose to incarnate here. You knew full well the risks and how dirty it was. In fact, chances are, things could probably be worse (I think one of the last Q'uo channelings in 2008 mentions that our vibrations are much higher than anticipated already). But each time we keep our chin up and look for love, we double each effort previous. Sometimes that's enough to encourage me to keep going. Everything helps. Just being here helps. Every step we taking beyond being into doing helps a little more. There are no "others" who are suffering. You are suffering. If you can ease your own suffering, the others' suffering will be eased, as well. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but the first is: stop the suffering within.

You lead into root issues really good!

I agree wholeheartedly, I am suffering!  I have suffered ever since the moment I realized others are suffering!  I don't know why, but it's only gotten more and more as time passes.  But I keep making sense of it so I imagine I'll be fine.

I have various crystals by my side, I usually have several in my right pocket when I'm working to help me stay tuned.  I need to remember the names though.    I usually like the 7-layer sets, and would actually like to keep stones for each chakra with me at all times.  Maybe two for each lower chakra to help me out a bit along the way.

[Jade]

Do either of you clear your stones?

If you work with stones regularly to reduce negative energy, it's good to clear that energy on a somewhat regular basis. Smudging with sage, leaving them in the moonlight, resting them in salt - otherwise they can get overloaded.

Continuing to process the suffering you feel, again, helps the whole. It's a very noble effort and I'm humbled watching you put the pieces together in your anguish. Thank you for your service, truly. I'm happy to attempt to help any time.

[AnthroHeart]

I've only had my stones for 3 days. Haven't cleared them yet.

[Jade]

Did you clear them when you brought them home?

[AnthroHeart]

Did you clear them when you brought them home?

No. I could run them under water to clear them too. But they are sealed in plastic.

[Minyatur]

I never clear any of my crystals.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

I loved how clear and pristine they all became after leaving them under the supermoon!

I clear them on the moons schedule since I'm a night time guy, otherwise salt, burying them, and running them in water, or sea salt and water bath are viable methods I think.

I love crystals, they're my friends

[Jade]

Most crystals absorb energy, in fact, most people's intentions when carrying stones is to help protect and/or reduce negativity. Many stones just absorb and store those negative vibes. Also, when you bring one home, you never know who has programmed what into them, or what they've picked up. It's good to clear them once in a while to refresh them and release the stagnant energy, imo. Even if they don't feel bogged down, a difference in energy vitality can usually be felt after a good cleanse.

Some stones are too soft to run under water, like selenite. But most are okay. I just burn sage from time to time to energetically clear my whole house, crystals included.

The crew asked about a crystal Carla had been given as a gift, and this was Ra's response:

88.7 Questioner: Is the small crystal that the instrument uses upon her during the session of any benefit or detriment?

Ra: I am Ra. This crystal is beneficial as long as he who has charged it is functioning in a positively oriented manner.

[AnthroHeart]

I don't use my crystals for absorbing negativity. I programmed them for balancing my chakras and keeping me grounded.

They are sealed in plastic, so I'd need to rip it open to cleanse them.

I also have a quartz double-terminated crystal that I use for my meditations sometimes.

[Minyatur]

I carry crystals to mix with my vibrations. On shrooms I pick different ones on trips to connect with their energies in nature or charge them with my energy. Or I simply lay out my hand and charge them from times to times when i feel called to. Otherwise they're either on me or placed in 2 geometric grids I made with them.

Sometimes there are some that seem to want to be away from me, like I keep dropping it and when it drops it gets somehow far from me or hidden and hard to find. Got a green calcite I lost two times for several months and it ended up breaking into two pieces two days ago.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

That's cause you don't clean the poor fella, just leave it in the moon and apologize to it.  They need baths like you too Min

Just turns out they bath differently than us, as well as just like us

I had a Larimer that I called Laminar, it grew to seriously dislike me from my never cleaning it.  And yup, it disappeared and I have never found it since...  I miss it so much...