04-19-2022, 04:36 PM
(This post was last modified: 04-19-2022, 05:32 PM by MusingsofanAwakenedIteration.)
Hello, everyone! I really appreciate reading all the different perspectives based on this enlightening and life-changing book series. When reading through it and trying to figure out what was going on with me, fine tuning myself and my Chakras, I connected with it in my own way. As stated, this is my opinion (acclimation) of the Matrix of the Spirit when I read through it.
As Ra stated, "Therefore, may we ask the student to look up from inward working and behold the glory, the might, the majesty, the mystery, and the peace of oneness. Let no consideration of bird or beast, darkness or light, shape or shadow keep any which seeks from the central consideration of unity. We are not messengers of the complex. We bring the message of unity. In this perspective only may we affirm the value to the seeker of adepthood of the grasping, articulating, and use of this resource of the deep mind exemplified by the concept complexes of the archetypes. Elkins, Don; Rueckert, Carla; McCarty, Jim. The Ra Contact: Teaching the Law of One: Volume 2 (p. 465). L/L Research. Kindle Edition. "
Drawing upon my own life experiences (catalysts), I started off my life hating everything pretty much. I didn’t like my life at all. I hated the fact that I had no choice to be born but now was stuck with making my life the best I could be - being the best I could be to survive. One of the first things I learned was that you can’t trust anyone. When you reach out for help, you get nothing but pain in return. So I went inward. Developed myself. I used everything to make myself better. Screw the world.
In all of this, I valued the one thing that I could rely on. That was me. The power of one. I overcame lot of things, let's say, with no help from anyone. Others brought pain. However, I focused all that negative energy to make myself the best I could be. I believed in my word. My word was me. I wouldn’t say/promise anything if there was any doubt that I couldn’t fulfill that promise. I was me, even back then. Just really negative me.
Survival. That was it. I grew up wanting to see the world burn, metaphorically. Although, some days I wanted literal. I learned very early on that the world was a sh@thole. A place for souls to be tormented. Essentially, hell on earth.
As eluded to in my opening thread, the chapter in my life where I was back with my biological father, the catalysts was even darker for me, at least I saw it as that back then. Locked in a room a lot with no food, I made the best of the situation to better myself. Balancing on my bed (when I eventually got my own), calisthenics, meditating to calm my breathing and heart rate (lots of fear back then), and, surprisingly, reading the bible. My biological father was a man in search of his soul. He was a minister/participant in lots of Christian faiths. I read that bible (which I still have to this day) backwards and forwards. Although, flawed in lots of ways, it did save me. I still feel like if not for the info that did resonate with me and making my own life amalgamation, I would truly be a devil, if you will, with all the things I suffered.
During those years, I had to question everything - still do. What is right? What is wrong? Is it wrong to be locked in a room by “Christians” that told me it was for my own good? To starve a kid? Not to mention the other things that went on…I had to steal so I could eat. Was that a crime? To steal to survive? When I moved in with my biological mother (from a small town to a big city, whole different story), I had this annoying, yet pervasive drive to be kind to others. Because of what I gleaned from the bible, I didn’t want to be evil, if you will. The life conundrum that I lived. Hating life, but knowing the value of it.
I spent lots of time with the elderly in the church. I learned early on that that group had lots to share, as far as someone trying to learn as much as possible to survive, and quite honestly, to be human. I have never felt like I was a normal person, a “normie” I guess. In my mind, I always referred to others as “those humans”. One more word about the elderly in the church before I move on, I was also attracted to them because they were the only ones that I allowed to touch me. Their touch was welcoming, lots of compliments about my hair, heh. Very gentle. All other “touching” from other people I would flinch, brace myself for what’s next.
So, to bring it back to the Matrix of the Spirit, I believe it comes down to personal interpretation based on all the complexities of life as we know it. I’m just really thankful for the natural gifts that were given to me at birth to be able to bring me to the point I am now and rid myself of the veil and partially see what really is. Life to me is truly beginning!
Peace to all of you!
As Ra stated, "Therefore, may we ask the student to look up from inward working and behold the glory, the might, the majesty, the mystery, and the peace of oneness. Let no consideration of bird or beast, darkness or light, shape or shadow keep any which seeks from the central consideration of unity. We are not messengers of the complex. We bring the message of unity. In this perspective only may we affirm the value to the seeker of adepthood of the grasping, articulating, and use of this resource of the deep mind exemplified by the concept complexes of the archetypes. Elkins, Don; Rueckert, Carla; McCarty, Jim. The Ra Contact: Teaching the Law of One: Volume 2 (p. 465). L/L Research. Kindle Edition. "
Drawing upon my own life experiences (catalysts), I started off my life hating everything pretty much. I didn’t like my life at all. I hated the fact that I had no choice to be born but now was stuck with making my life the best I could be - being the best I could be to survive. One of the first things I learned was that you can’t trust anyone. When you reach out for help, you get nothing but pain in return. So I went inward. Developed myself. I used everything to make myself better. Screw the world.
In all of this, I valued the one thing that I could rely on. That was me. The power of one. I overcame lot of things, let's say, with no help from anyone. Others brought pain. However, I focused all that negative energy to make myself the best I could be. I believed in my word. My word was me. I wouldn’t say/promise anything if there was any doubt that I couldn’t fulfill that promise. I was me, even back then. Just really negative me.
Survival. That was it. I grew up wanting to see the world burn, metaphorically. Although, some days I wanted literal. I learned very early on that the world was a sh@thole. A place for souls to be tormented. Essentially, hell on earth.
As eluded to in my opening thread, the chapter in my life where I was back with my biological father, the catalysts was even darker for me, at least I saw it as that back then. Locked in a room a lot with no food, I made the best of the situation to better myself. Balancing on my bed (when I eventually got my own), calisthenics, meditating to calm my breathing and heart rate (lots of fear back then), and, surprisingly, reading the bible. My biological father was a man in search of his soul. He was a minister/participant in lots of Christian faiths. I read that bible (which I still have to this day) backwards and forwards. Although, flawed in lots of ways, it did save me. I still feel like if not for the info that did resonate with me and making my own life amalgamation, I would truly be a devil, if you will, with all the things I suffered.
During those years, I had to question everything - still do. What is right? What is wrong? Is it wrong to be locked in a room by “Christians” that told me it was for my own good? To starve a kid? Not to mention the other things that went on…I had to steal so I could eat. Was that a crime? To steal to survive? When I moved in with my biological mother (from a small town to a big city, whole different story), I had this annoying, yet pervasive drive to be kind to others. Because of what I gleaned from the bible, I didn’t want to be evil, if you will. The life conundrum that I lived. Hating life, but knowing the value of it.
I spent lots of time with the elderly in the church. I learned early on that that group had lots to share, as far as someone trying to learn as much as possible to survive, and quite honestly, to be human. I have never felt like I was a normal person, a “normie” I guess. In my mind, I always referred to others as “those humans”. One more word about the elderly in the church before I move on, I was also attracted to them because they were the only ones that I allowed to touch me. Their touch was welcoming, lots of compliments about my hair, heh. Very gentle. All other “touching” from other people I would flinch, brace myself for what’s next.
So, to bring it back to the Matrix of the Spirit, I believe it comes down to personal interpretation based on all the complexities of life as we know it. I’m just really thankful for the natural gifts that were given to me at birth to be able to bring me to the point I am now and rid myself of the veil and partially see what really is. Life to me is truly beginning!
Peace to all of you!