forgiveness, what does it really mean

[Charles]

Lulu wrote:

For example, I don't usually give friends with a Jewish heritage advice on how to forgive their familes past and recent perps. because I can't imagine having faced that atrocity in my own heritage. I would likely come up sounded uncompassionate and rather shallow to them.

So, FYI, I'm a Jew too, and as Ashim wrote, All Is Well Lulu.

I cannot speak for all Jews, but I don't feel that we as a group spend all of our time remembering the atrocity. When I think of it, I think about those souls who turned to their religion, and became more prayerful during the horror .... and of those who lost all faith, became angry with God, and dropped all prayer during the horror.

And I've wondered, where I would have fit in if I were there (?) I'd like to think that I would have chosen the comfort of That One, but I don't know.

I too have decided to avoid those consistently negative people, because their energy can be strong, and it hurts me too much, and I don't feel the power to help, or to change, them. But I do send them love and wish them well.

That has Nothing to do with forgiving. If someone self-destructs, there is nothing for me to forgive them for. And in a way, we've all been there. How many wrong and self destructive decisions have we all made?

It's called learning and growing. Forgiving yourself at such times is appropriate.