To the truly balanced entity no situation would be emotionally charged.

[Ali Quadir]

I think when you're attached to a lover there is the expectation that this person will bring you happiness and fulfillment.. This expectation is unrealistic, no person is so perfect that they can truly complete us. When you're unattached this means you will always look within to find that happiness and fulfillment. You are complete on your own. You don't expect or need the other person to supply it.

Being in a relationship is much much more than "what can that other person do for me". It is about the genuine wish to interact with that other person on a recurring basis and building from this interaction a kind of shared reality.

If the other person goes away through death or simply because paths lead them elsewhere, and we're unattached we will remember the good times and don't impose on the other the frustration of unfulfilled expectations. The long term well-being and happiness of the partners then becomes more important than the fulfillment of emotional addictions.

You're not there to get your fix of "being loved" you're there because you wish to spend time with the other person.

And not being clingy, not putting your well-being in the hands of another person, but instead spending the time in the here and now, this is actually a very good basis for a relationship.