Suicide

[Dinko]

Yes... I really really REALLY don't want to go through another full set 3D incarnations. Otherwise, things couldn't be harder for me right now and I might consider that option if it weren't for that probability. Also I recognize this is going to be very special "show", so I am trying to hang on the best I can.

I am having extreme difficulty scraping by in the "old world". Despite all the signs screaming the message of what is about to transpire, nobody else around me seems to hear this. So they make it seem like this isn't going to come true. Thus, since I have such a tendency to feel what other's are feeling, I sort of become them so that I might see things from their perspective.

I don't know how to explain to them why I have so many difficulties trying to insert myself into what I see is a very complex version of slavery in most instances (a job). I only seek to do this so I don't have some of my most important personal relationships go sour, as they just wouldn't understand why I am being so picky about finding a job that I can be comfortable with.

I feel like I am waiting to start my "real" life, and I'm just waiting for the fireworks to start so I can begin.

I am waiting for 21.12 so that we can go home