Astrology

[Confused]

i have attacks of rage. righht now i'm frunk so it don't matter but i can't stand being around my mom i start chanting i hate you and i just can't stand it! but i think it's cuz i want to be on my own i've never had true independence cuz i'm autistic. but it just brings me to this separative violent ripping away that i need to sever these tubes of babyness and be my own person. i feel so stifled. i mean what do you do when you can't live alone but you need to? i don't think i knew this would happen. i mean Dolores says we came here to help but all i've done is be helpless. by all the mental disease and stuff, i never got a hold of this life. but i'm clearly an alien.

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and we love you Monkey, if i was tuff on you it was cuz im passionate about that stuff, never because i don't think you're a great person!

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gosh i sound like a true spazz! don't mind me.

Oceania, I cry along with you. That is all I can say and that is all I can do.

I/we love you. Just words may be. However, I do hope they make a little bit of difference.

My eyes well up as I think of what you wrote.