05-09-2022, 12:05 AM
Hmm, ok, there is a lot of "I's" in there. I have nothing else to say at the moment, I'll definitely look into this.
I have tried to contemplate what it all means, and I could only bring it down to the fact that I must have a lot of bad karma. Then I wonder why I had an awakening, because it was so beautiful and when I realised I was the real me I was extremely positive, but yet there's all of this stuff that has happened to me. Then I think ok, maybe I'm not a wanderer and maybe I'm one of these beings that Ra talks about that when we finally get to choose our own lifetimes, we make the mistake of choosing too much catalyst and that's what I've done. Then I wonder why my higher self didn't give me a spiritual slap and say that's too much aha.
As you can see it's all very confusing, but you're right, I know I need to dive deeper in some way. I've tried meditating for long hours, I've read countless amounts of spiritual books, I've had healing from a crystal healer, these all helped a lot but I still don't get the meaning of everything.
I did finally let go with the thought that the answers will come when I'm ready, and that maybe the seeking and striving for answers is actually blocking me from getting them.
But you've definitely given me something to think about, thank you sillypumpkins.
I have tried to contemplate what it all means, and I could only bring it down to the fact that I must have a lot of bad karma. Then I wonder why I had an awakening, because it was so beautiful and when I realised I was the real me I was extremely positive, but yet there's all of this stuff that has happened to me. Then I think ok, maybe I'm not a wanderer and maybe I'm one of these beings that Ra talks about that when we finally get to choose our own lifetimes, we make the mistake of choosing too much catalyst and that's what I've done. Then I wonder why my higher self didn't give me a spiritual slap and say that's too much aha.
As you can see it's all very confusing, but you're right, I know I need to dive deeper in some way. I've tried meditating for long hours, I've read countless amounts of spiritual books, I've had healing from a crystal healer, these all helped a lot but I still don't get the meaning of everything.
I did finally let go with the thought that the answers will come when I'm ready, and that maybe the seeking and striving for answers is actually blocking me from getting them.
But you've definitely given me something to think about, thank you sillypumpkins.