Ericon is here

[Steppingfeet]

Hi Ericon,

Thank you for taking this opportunity to speak, and so candidly, I might add. I really enjoyed skipping along some of the big highlights of your 32-year incarnate journey thus far.

From age 15 for many years onward, it sounds like substances played a predominant role in your life as a means of coping and self-medicating (along with the usual more superficial culprits of escapism and pleasure-seeking). It's incredible, actually, how these two threads - the spiritual development (of the higher centers) and the personality development (of the lower centers) - can coexist side by side and be out of balance. As you highlight:

My spiritual routine naturally became less strict but I was pretty much practicing self-enquiry wherever and whenever instead. A moment of profound realization came about a year after my physical return or homecoming. It was obvious that this is it. It is the totality that I am.

Turbulent years followed, involving two broken intimate relationships and years of excessive drinking and weed smoking. Through it all I found refuge in the One.

In simple maybe simplistic terms, higher openings seem to tend to amplify the unhealed tangles of the lower. Which is a good thing, ultimately, if the catalyst is used. But because the missteps in the night are "oh! so easy," it can go the other way too.

But something was missing. I was lost. Cannabis had opened me up, and I was desperate for a more stable, joyful and sober state. Suddenly I was conscious of that I was searching for something. Something that would save me. Something more. Enlightenment seemed to be it. I established a strict spiritual practice with meditation and pranayama with Yogani's aypsite.org as a guide. Things began to open up internally, but as they did, my outer life came crumbling down and it was not before long that I found myself back in my old hometown in Sweden, the place I had fled years ago. I had never intended to go back.

If identifiable, what was the catalyst for the "suddenly"? What triggered you to become conscious that you were "searching for something"? Not of any particular consequence, as the outer mechanism is just the outworking of a much deeper internal process, but I'm always curious what sparks the conscious seeking.

My spiritual routine naturally became less strict but I was pretty much practicing self-enquiry wherever and whenever instead. A moment of profound realization came about a year after my physical return or homecoming. It was obvious that this is it. It is the totality that I am.

My previous ways of intense striving of becoming are over. I am. I have knowledge of this through the unforced remembrance or natural noticing of what is. Still, I find myself here in third density and I find the Law of One material helpful and soothing in contextualizing this experience. There is an intense totality left, that which I was so busy fleeing from before. Nothing is as it has been, but something is oddly familiar

This emanates a great degree of peace with the self, with what is. Catastrophe combined with the death/rebirth experience facilitated by LSD seems to have contributed to this present degree of equanimity. Is there anything else to which you would attribute a release of the tumult in the abidance of what is?

I wish every Wanderer the very best. There is light ahead. There is an answer. You’re it.

"There is an answer. You're it." Another variation on You are the truth that you seek. I love it.

Thanks again, Ericon. Blessings.