Relationship Advice Regarding Love/Wisdom STS/STO

[Inkshards]

I do not think it is fair to bring STS and STO into a discussion which clearly is surrounded by confusion, mental confusion which is due to trauma.

The question was formulated in context to the STS/STO.

Maybe Inkshards will make further comments on this thread, because he has to decide which answers are helpful for him?

The question would have been if my choice to not chase after my mom after she officially walked out of the family was a STS move because I would be free of her emotional manipulation and pull.

If I chose to chase her down, most likely nothing would change and I would just be putting myself in the martyr position to please her and show her that I love her which would be a binding of myself.

I know taking care of the self is STO and STS is control, manipulation and placing your will above another. And there is concurrency with Love/STO and wisdome/STS.

It's just a painful situation due to it being a parent who you love who is choosing to leave the family after you have tried your best to bring, heal and build some semblance of a loving and functional family. It's more so a war between my love and desire for a family that never was and the truth of the reality.