(04-10-2021, 03:21 PM)zedro Wrote: The fact that you try to repress these thoughts yet they keep surfacing (and reacting energetically) to me suggests that you absolutely need to deal with them, to expose, discern, dismantle and heal yourself from them. The thoughts themselves are just symptoms, the goal is to find the root and untangle it, and sometimes that may all be that is required (well self Acceptance/forgiveness is, but that needs to happen organically and not in a contrived way...some people can make daily affirmations work, for others it's just a form of bypassing). These thoughts are obviously invasive, and the distraction (to put it mildly) will absolutely hinder achieving higher activations, or just generally feeling well adjusted in mundane terms. As I pointed out before, this is typical, the exactitude of your thoughts is only relevant to you in processing them. Keep in mind, this can be a very uncomfortable process, just try to keep a practical approach and avoid the pitfalls of self judgement, because the key to acceptance is ultimately understanding what truly matters, and some things 'just are', and need no validation or scorn.
There are better 'academics' here than me to point you to appropriate Law of One passages (and other sources) which are indeed helpful to ones perspective, but I will offer you what was elemental in my healing, which is not entirely different from your case. The link below is a post I made for my shadow exercises, and the thread itself is useful in this respect as well.
https://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthre...#pid286784
Thank You, Sir.
Could You share what was healed on Your part?
I think I should start with the fear of death. The root of all.