Can you accept being a loser in this world?

[houtje]

Rin wrote this in march 12 th 2020. That was near the height of fear as world tilted towards sts dark matrix. Rin also asked for aid in the healing forums.

Evolving dragon, because his energy triggered what you disliked about yourself when you first came here, this was the weakness exploited. By reacting, you fed orion during the 2020 take over. They were starving for energy power to manifest a cabal timeline.

You soon realized this because you regained root access to mind heart.

All these shifts had to be neutralized with the group meditations in april. Otherwise we really would have entered a timeline where millions or billions died and cabal took over.

This is why spiritual power tests humans to see if they are worthy.

But everyone is tested same time but at different levels.

The more and more tests you fail for your chosen polarity, the farther back in the q you get. Seniority of vibration so to speak. These tests get harder the more you pass initiations.

As for me on a personal note, i feek back then as now.

Cabal will not win. Compassion is more important than winning via dark matrix rules. I am not playing to win. I am here to burn it down, even the veil itself. Thus when people as in march were freaking out, i felt no need to argue or fight. I merely told them world was not ending.

They merely have to survive to 2021

Yeah I think I'm starting to realise this. I'm often contemplating if I should speak up if I see someone else doing something sketchy. There is no right thing, but for me it is becoming increasingly important to keep my mouth shut. And if I would decide to say something, it would have to be the gentlest of actions; barely noticeable.

If I go off on someone, I feel depleted afterwards. And all I'm doing is judging other-self. Which is not forgiveness.

I guess I should only speak if asked for, specifically. And I'm talking for me, not you or anyone. Just wanted to share the insight/hunch, dunno why.

Then again; I'm not sure. If I'm honest and I see some really messed up ideas/rhetoric/doctrine/behaviour, I have this burning inside of me and I want to fight! But I also really don't because I don't want to hurt anyone. But daaaaaaamn, I get so angry... but angry while I'm frantically laughing. I cannot, for the life of me seem to understand what this feeling is.

It's like.... something inside me just wants to kick those people's (often "spiritual" people) asses. Exactly the same energy as RisingPhoenix.

I don't get ANYTHING out of it. It costs me time and energy. It depletes me. And yet, If I hold it in, it feels like I'm ignoring something vitally important.

Jesus man... I don't want be the warrior. But I HAVE to be the warrior. This paradox! It's killing me with laughter, I swear to God, I'm gonna die laughing!