Finding Acceptance in the Face of Control

[Navaratna]

Diana, do you not think that in fact the control of the Veil is in fact in each of us separate hands, so becomes in fact just a personal control for each one of... that control ?   Decidedly there is a moment where the young soul starts to plan its own incarnation, so there is a pinpoint moment where it all falls on us really, and as work takes place, each one of us will pierce the veil more and more via different disciplines and see through.

Yes, I see your point. But until that moment of which you speak, and until enough evolution of consciousness takes place, there is separation because of the veil, and from that, much suffering—and not only for humans but also for 1st and 2nd density life.

I have no idea if it would be better without the veil in terms of evolution of consciousness. I can only imagine how tricky being a guardian or overseer is. I have a little pond in which frogs/toads spawn, and I keep water for the desert animals and give them some food. I am constantly aware of the responsibility of helping the desert creatures. Early on, for example, when I first moved here, and I put water dishes out, I learned that I had to put rocks in the dishes so lizards and baby quail and the little creatures didn't drown with no way to get out. There is so much to consider in being a caretaker of a property with wildlife—how much to help; not to do anything; grow natural food sources, let them naturally exist in the desert. I feed the polliwogs cooked spinach because I read that they will eat each other when there isn't enough food. Should I do that? I don't know; I only know that they are there and I can do it, and it seems okay.

I am controlling my property and the welfare of the animals here by being a caretaker of the land and the creatures on it. The alternative is to see them without water in the heat (land developers built over the local watering hole) and without food sometimes when things really dry up, and that can happen to the deer when they are pregnant. If I extrapolate from my own little experience here, how much more complex is the task of the guardian or overseer of this entire place? 

I can sort of relate to that.

There was a dog that has been kind of indecisive on how he wanted to behave toward me
One day he kept staring at me from afar but didn't want to get to close.

I didn't want to give him too much of my food, but he was very intrigued by me around the corner of a wall.
Every time I came closer to try and show him friendliness, he backed off quickly and tried to get away.
I tried to show him friendliness with the same response each time and gave him a snack.

I gave up after a while, and I didn't want to give him all my food. I sat back and tried to simply meditate on him to give him energy. He started barking aggressively, sensing my energy and it being so unfamiliar to him. The odd feeling of a much more intellectually powerful, and physically stronger entity directing "vibrations" at him intimidated/scared him and he started barking loudly. I simply closed the entrance and said adios.

I imagine Ra must have felt the same way with primitive humans, as Neanderthals or Homo Erectus. At times amusing and fun, other times encountering frustrating or obnoxious behavior. Ra wasn't willing to sacrifice his soul the same way I wasn't going to give the dog all my food.