some thoughts on service to self (sts)

[Ray711]

I'm saying that trying to help others to be more loving, in this context...is selfish.
To want others to be STO or United...and then go around trying to help them understand that it's what the all wants...is STS.
PERHAPS they have chosen to be separate this incarnation. To want something for another that they haven't chosen...is selfish.

Yes, you're talking about a violation of free will. That is selfish indeed. But it must be said that despite of acting in love's name, it's STS behavior, not STO. STO has enormous respect for free will.

This brings us to the dilemma that you mentioned, which I think is very interesting: Is it selfish to show love and light even to those who are burned by it?

I feel there are three options in a situation of being greeted by a negative entity. One can send love and light; one can wish upon the other-self that which is desired by them; or one can be indifferent to the entity.

Indifference doesn't really work with negative entities. They call themselves to conquest; their polarity is based on violating other entities' free will. As such, they will try their hardest to make it so that you don't have the option to be indifferent to them. This is so by the grand design of the Creation. Negative entities, and the purpose of  the negative path as a whole, was meant to force the attention of positive entities into those aspects of themselves that needed work; their weaknesses. We will not work on our fear if we are never put in situations that cause us fear.

The other option is to wish that the negative entity gets what they desire. For an entity that wishes to enslave others, you will find that you cannot remain positive if you desire that such an entity fulfills their desires. Ra was very clear about this when Don asked them how they could help the 5th density negative entity that was attacking them. This entity wants Carla dead, Ra said, knowing full well that Don would not consider killing Carla a true service.

So that only leaves the other option, to send love and light to such an entity, even when they don't want this. How is this a true service, then, if the entity doesn't desire this? I think this is a very valid and also a very important question.

To see the situation more clearly, I think it's important we look at what creates the pull towards the negative polarity. We know that the negative polarity didn't exist when there was no veil of forgetting. This means that there is absolutely zero motivation for any soul in Creation to choose the negative side, unless this choice is based on an illusion; on falsity. We are love. Love is literally what we are made of. We cannot escape love, and we cannot stop desiring love. Love can be twisted in many, many different ways. It is said that there is nothing in Creation that is not love. This love can become so twisted that it looks like anything but love, but in reality it still is very much love.

That is the nature of STS. It's a twisted form of love, one where love is considered to be found in power, in struggle, in control. This is unavoidable for an entity that has become so invested in the illusion of physicality, that they came to believe that the rules of the physical world are everything that matters.

Deep down, the soul always yearns for a more pure form of love. Have you at any time in your life given up on finding love? I have, and coupled with the atheistic beliefs I had at the time, and thus with the notion that there was nothing better waiting for me anywhere, it felt humiliating to see other people who I perceived had found love. I had bought into the notion that life was cruel, empty, meaningless, and also on that true love didn't even exist; that it was just a trick, a product of natural selection. The very notion that other people could find it and experience it was an attack to my worldviews. Furthermore, it acted as a painful reminder of the very thing I had given up on. Such experiences, I feel, allowed me to witness the shadow self's emotions. I felt the temptation to wish upon people who I thought had found love the kind of experience that would break that love so that their eyes could be opened to the cruel and meaningless nature of reality.

Now, I never went through with such temptations. On one hand, because I knew a part of myself could not live with itself if I were to fall into such blatant negativity. Also, I was never interested in power. At a conscious level, I could never quite forget that love was what I wanted. And so, the only remaining option for the, at the time, was the sinkhole of indifference. But just imagine an entity that decides to truly go down that path. To become so committed to such a path, during many many incarnations, and then during many millions of years over the course of the higher densities.

Entities like that think in terms of the removal of the light, like Ra said. Why? Because the light is deeply insulting to them at a personal level; to their world views. Contact with the light makes it painfully obvious that they have embraced falsity. No one wants to believe that they have embraced and committed to falsity. As such, the only thing left to do is to attempt to destroy the very thing that threatens and that can reveal such falsity.

So, yes, negative entities dislike it. But at the same time, shining love and light upon them has the potential to make them see that love and light is what they truly desire deep down, at the level of the soul. Ra:

"(...) the most accepting and loving energy would be to so love those who wished to manipulate that those entities were surrounded, engulfed, and transformed by positive energies."

Given a powerful enough positive entity, negative entities can potentially be transformed by such radiating love. This is the principle behind wishing love and light to negative entities. I like to think of it as a resource that you put at their disposal. Love is never forced on the other entity. You love, and then the other entity is completely free to either accept this love, or to leave. So, it's not a violation of free will. If you were to send love with the intention of making a negative entity flee, then yes, this action would carry a certain charge of negativity. But love sent sincerely from the open heart and with the best of wishes for the other entity, is a love that is completely respectful and accepting of free will.

Misery truly does love company. The heartbreaking thing is that even that is based on a desire for love. When someone is feeling in such a low vibrational state and experiencing such dark emotions, one desires a sense of relatedness. One wants to be seen, to be understood. Making others feel how one is feeling is one quick and effective way for the mind to tell itself that the self is finally understood, whereas surrounding oneself with people who are in the complete opposite emotional state feels discordant; like one is invisible, misunderstood, perhaps even defective. But there is a choice. If one is in darkness, one can always decide to start moving in the direction towards the light, and find company there, in joy, in peace, in compassion, rather than in misery. By wishing love and light to STS entities, we are given them an opportunity to make this choice.

I've probably written too much, and I was reluctant to share the personal things I've shared about myself. However, I feel that having had such experiences with my own shadow can be something valuable in terms of understanding the STS path. If sharing them can help in any way, then it would be a disservice not to share them.