to be harvestable, must one be generally full of joy??

[AnthroHeart]

I always like think on the aspect of energy centers. What's a harvesteable entity in terms of energy? It's someone who the kundalini arised to the green-ray energy center or heart chakra. When this occur, the awareness level and personality change to the unconditional love. It's the first spirtual awakening. The love for every live being is described as full of joy for the life. So, a harvesteable entity is full of joy. But, in order to open the heart and become harvesteable , the three lower centers must be clean and balanced.

A non-identification with the life or depression is a blockage in the first center, the root of the experience. If this center is blocked (generally because the entity seek the higher levels and ignore the physical experience) there is no identification with the world. The world must not be ignored, it must be understood.

So funny, Infinite,  this is so in line with something that once, years ago,  an old psychiatrist told me.  We were talking about depression, and he said to me,  " You know  flo,  in most cases I met, in my life with my patients, I have noticed this.  If they have a peculiar choice to make, an action to take,  as long as they wait, as long as they doubt they are able to enter into action, they stay in depression. The day they make the choice, and enter into an action,  the depression lifts off like a fog . Of course they will meet obstacles, but so clearly the  moment they commit to that decision, the  change is quite amazing."

Of course he did say, not in all cases.  But still that was so interesting.  Tough to be a human.

Thanks for writing this flo. I really appreciate it. Agua told me I have to "choose to live" in order to continue my healing... I've been struggling to fully commit to that choice every day, instead either beating myself up for past failures and painful experiences or ignoring the pain via distraction or literal sleep. It's hard to commit to living my life. And I feel like such a self centered a****** and shitty friend too. God, healing only gets harder the more I mess up, and the more un-heal I am, the more I mess up. And then it's like I become more un-heal. It's like a vicous cycle of pain and regret. I guess I've just gotta commit myself to living better, I dunno. But I know I've got to break the cycle.
So thanks dor posting that. It helps.

You got a healing from someone I recommended, so it may have stirred up some subconscious stuff. When we heal, it can do that, and be fairly unpleasant. Healing is not always rainbows.