what are the ways in which we avoid catalyst?

[MangusKhan]

Thanks Tae, that Mountain Magic stuff has a good reputation. I'm gonna buy some and practice my masseuse skills on this guy whenever I next return home. In the meantime I've let him know these things exist as options, and he's open-minded to try anything at this point.

If you have such a gift for massage and back healing then why don't you become a masseuse? Seems like a good service to render in a world full of ailing bodies.

The truth is that I did for about 2 years which is why I make these claims about my abilities. They are what other people have said about me–I developed a reputation as a very gifted body worker, and this attracted a couple of the wrong kind of clients. To be quite honest, I was raped at work and didn't like how my boss handled it and this drove a wedge between me and the industry, which was a shame because they were willing to pay for my training to become a traditional Chinese practitioner (not just massage but acupuncture and herbal medicine, etc) if I continued to work for them full time. When I received an opportunity to pursue art, I cut all of my ties to that world.

I don't actually believe I made the wrong decision because I would not have enjoyed feeling beholden to someone whose shop also supported the business of some winky wink extras. However, as one good gentle soul, I've felt very much uncomfortable with the idea of re-opening practice independently in my own home. I know that when the opportunity emerges for me to become a healer again, I'll find the right space. It's frustrating because I was doing a lot of good but I don't know how to moderate/vet people to ensure I only get safe clients as a non-RMT offering a spiritual healing gift delivered through massage. It's not that the work is illegal, but that the work attracts people who want something else.   And I as someone who put myself there to heal their wounds found that almost unbearably difficult, as I wanted myself to be able to fix everything. My biggest regret is no longer being able to work on the people who came to me through that specific business who received definite spiritual healing. Gods, there was one client who cried every time, the whole way through, just an empty black hole aching for love.

This is why at the moment I only work on friends for free. Lucky bums. I have not yet figured out how I will progress because I sorely miss being a healer.

That's a real mess what happened to you at your old masseuse job, sorry to hear that. I would never have thought that someone would go to a remedial massage therapy with that in mind. My best wishes for you and your healing journey, and I'm glad your friends still get the benefit of your work.