To fight or not to fight (in 3d and 4d)?

[loostudent]

How can someone who wants to be STO deal with negativity in family for example?

Sometimes just by accepting it, to start with. If you try to accelerate their polarization in the direction you think they should go, then aren't you effectively taking over still? It's not really in the STO nature to be aggressively proactive towards manifesting change /.../

Its hard to be a pacifist in family. As a parent (or teacher) you have responsibility for others until they grow up. You can't just distance yourself when your highly lively children are running wild, being stubborn, beating each other, destroying things, making a mess, testing your nerves, making noise etc. etc. You are forced to interfere. Sometimes also physicaly prevent something.

It's like a plant. You have to cultivate it or else it doesn't bear fruit - like a grapevine grows wild if you don't prune it. That's why discipline is necessary and strictness, rules, punishment, repression etc. But all I would like is to be kind, gentle and loving. So it comes to an inner conflict.