Catalyst

[MangusKhan]

As I was sitting in the library today this guy came in acting funny. He seemed too friendly in the worse kind of way. He sat down at the computer next to me and started talking to me. It turned out he was a homeless ex-addict who's 7y.o. daughter had just been killed by a drunk driver. He broke down and cried and I didn't know what to do but just be there with him as he made a scene and people started shuffling away. I decided that this was clearly God giving me another surprise duty and took him to the park to drink beer and smoke ciggies and talk through his woes in a more private setting. Things got out of hand though and, long story short, I basically ended up watching over this guy while he shot up heroin in the outer suburbs. He was okay, and between the heroin and being able to vent his feelings he was a lot better by the time I said goodbye. I told him I wouldn't see him again, but we hugged and he cried.

I don't even know how I feel about all this. Fear for humanity. I'm so tired I could cry. This post is just a secondhand vent.

you're a better man than me, i guess.  I will help out when i feel a positive energy from the person.  If i feel a negative energy, i tend to leave it be

I don't mind being used as an emotional tampon from time to time, it's just very important to assert that you're doing it because you feel bad for their situation and want to help them, and not because you want to be friends. Hit-and-run service is not so taxing. I feel a lot better this morning than I did last night, but if I now had to share energy with the guy again and again under some pretense of friendship that would just drive me insane.

His little girl got killed by a drunk driver, that's terrible. Someone had to give him an opportunity to vent and talk through his feelings, otherwise he'd still be wondering around the public library scaring people.