My friend, perhaps you would enjoy the story of Milarepa, one of my favorites.
https://treasuryoflives.org/biographies/...arepa/3178
In it you can see that even one who strays far in the darkness and ruins everything around them again and again is still walking the path and only through persiverence can true realization of the self be revealed. Some of your darknesses may at times become tools upon the path.
https://treasuryoflives.org/biographies/...arepa/3178
In it you can see that even one who strays far in the darkness and ruins everything around them again and again is still walking the path and only through persiverence can true realization of the self be revealed. Some of your darknesses may at times become tools upon the path.