Wanderers and relationships/sexuality

[Cainite]

I had another dream that I was intimate with someone in, I had a mate in the dream. we kissed and everything felt very real. it's like I went on a date now.
I remember last time this happened, I was missing her the next day. it was someone else though this time.

I don't really know them but in the dream I do. this has happened five times at least. even once the dream friend was a male. and we got along really fine. we had those magical very funny moments.. our sense of humor was in tune. unlike the dreams about the females, there wasn't any sexual attraction between us though.

I think solitude has made me a freak who has intimate relationships only in dreams when asleep.

The people who think they're my friends.. I don't feel close to them. they have been selfish in the past and I can only appreciate most of them from afar now. when we hang out they don't act conscious and also shamelessly care more about my benefits more than myself. these people make me feel more alone. but still they have many times provided catalysts for me that helped change my viewpoints and get out of my fantasy world a little, the world which I live in.