11-29-2010, 02:43 PM
I am intellectually aware of the fact that catalyst hits me all the time and that I could use it 100% efficiently, but I don't. Sometimes I forgot a situation is catalyst, sometimes I know it is but its hard to make a polarizing choice, usually I end up making the choice that makes me polarize more STO but sometimes its after alot of internal struggle. I don't see what's confusing about it to you. If I really, really, really wanted to I could use my catalyst 100% efficiently from this moment on but it comes down to my free will, how much I want to do that, how motivated I am to do that, how well I can handle pain. Are you saying its not free will because we don't have that many choices? As long as you have more than 1 choice its free will. Less choices sometimes is a good thing, it lets you explore those choices more fully.