11-05-2017, 05:24 PM
Haha that makes me think of the Futurama episode A Beast with a Million Backs. Where love between EVERYONE is as simple as not being so judgemental.
I'm very glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way, I didn't say anything because I do think I'd be too jealous or scared of my mate leaving me for another they preferred to be with, or worse a group.
It's a very terrible feeling knowing someone you love is banging other people without a care about you in mind. So, I think trust is a key component of a relationship, but I've always desired a monogamous relationship with dedication to each other in mind.
Not to mention I do honestly feel I will die alone (since I was around 7 I should add).
I always wanted a daughter, no idea why but I feel like I'd be a great father for a daughter. Instead I had a son lol
I haven't seen him in over 5 years now though. It's a very strange array of catalyst, having someone you love move away with your child. I admit I could have tried to do more but I didn't see any point in trying at the time against the odds that were there.
Overall I regret having a child very much, and wonder very often if I was simply meant to be a sperm donor rather than a father. In a way, I feel a great failure in not being there for my son, yet my friends have told me I shouldn't beat myself up over it because I had no control of the situation ever at all, that I shouldn't view myself as a deadbeat father because if not for the mother I would've been there. And that I should just wait to start a relationship with my son later in life.
Just sucks how it all turned out lol
Finally found someone I was ready to marry, we started a family, I was prepared to propose then she breaks up with me a week after our son is born and disappears into another state. If you ever date someone, make sure their family or they themselves don't have lawyer friends willing to work for them for free...
In many ways I have felt great anger towards sex in general because of what all has happened to me in sexual situations. As a child I had an older girl and boy use me sexually, as a teenager all sexual experiences were one-sided both with guys or girls. As a young adult I got to be with a few people and then found someone whom sexually and mentally we were perfect together, she purposefully got pregnant, stuck out staying with me to take care of her then left me almost immediately after our son was born then pretty much blocked me from knowing him beyond Skype calls then even stopped with that...
And everything after that to the present has been majorly a lack of sexual experiences at all.
Overall I'd say sex sucks! It just feels good, but the majority of people are so shallow, I'll never stand a chance, even obese girls can find dates, I'm sitting here like I know I'm not a 10/10 or even a 7 or a 6, but damn that is apparently all anyone gives a f*** for (pun intended).
I've a friend, he's clearly a 8, 9, 10ish, he's been with over 30 people.
I had a friend, she was around a 6 or 7, she'd been with over 50 people and lost count, basically banged everyone but not me lol.
So. I just wanted the sexual experiences, to get to be with different kinds of people, to explore the joys of sexual interaction. Sadly I was born less than attractive, I'll be lucky to break double digits lol...
Worse I'm a bit out there, weird and socially awkward. No women would ever bother with me. I'm just not attractive enough in physique or my life situation.
Try telling a date you're 25 still living with your mommy because your ex who's the mother of your son you haven't seen in years bailed on an apartment screwing you with an eviction and none of your friends want to be your roommate.
Can anyone say bye-bye? Haha.
I normally would be so upset discussing this, but looking back now, it's like a cosmic joke. I just hope if the patterns are true and real... I'll find another person to be with in a couple of years.
I hope so extremely, I don't think I could handle this life all alone...
I'm very glad to know I'm not the only one who feels that way, I didn't say anything because I do think I'd be too jealous or scared of my mate leaving me for another they preferred to be with, or worse a group.
It's a very terrible feeling knowing someone you love is banging other people without a care about you in mind. So, I think trust is a key component of a relationship, but I've always desired a monogamous relationship with dedication to each other in mind.
Not to mention I do honestly feel I will die alone (since I was around 7 I should add).
I always wanted a daughter, no idea why but I feel like I'd be a great father for a daughter. Instead I had a son lol
I haven't seen him in over 5 years now though. It's a very strange array of catalyst, having someone you love move away with your child. I admit I could have tried to do more but I didn't see any point in trying at the time against the odds that were there.
Overall I regret having a child very much, and wonder very often if I was simply meant to be a sperm donor rather than a father. In a way, I feel a great failure in not being there for my son, yet my friends have told me I shouldn't beat myself up over it because I had no control of the situation ever at all, that I shouldn't view myself as a deadbeat father because if not for the mother I would've been there. And that I should just wait to start a relationship with my son later in life.
Just sucks how it all turned out lol
Finally found someone I was ready to marry, we started a family, I was prepared to propose then she breaks up with me a week after our son is born and disappears into another state. If you ever date someone, make sure their family or they themselves don't have lawyer friends willing to work for them for free...
In many ways I have felt great anger towards sex in general because of what all has happened to me in sexual situations. As a child I had an older girl and boy use me sexually, as a teenager all sexual experiences were one-sided both with guys or girls. As a young adult I got to be with a few people and then found someone whom sexually and mentally we were perfect together, she purposefully got pregnant, stuck out staying with me to take care of her then left me almost immediately after our son was born then pretty much blocked me from knowing him beyond Skype calls then even stopped with that...
And everything after that to the present has been majorly a lack of sexual experiences at all.
Overall I'd say sex sucks! It just feels good, but the majority of people are so shallow, I'll never stand a chance, even obese girls can find dates, I'm sitting here like I know I'm not a 10/10 or even a 7 or a 6, but damn that is apparently all anyone gives a f*** for (pun intended).
I've a friend, he's clearly a 8, 9, 10ish, he's been with over 30 people.
I had a friend, she was around a 6 or 7, she'd been with over 50 people and lost count, basically banged everyone but not me lol.
So. I just wanted the sexual experiences, to get to be with different kinds of people, to explore the joys of sexual interaction. Sadly I was born less than attractive, I'll be lucky to break double digits lol...
Worse I'm a bit out there, weird and socially awkward. No women would ever bother with me. I'm just not attractive enough in physique or my life situation.
Try telling a date you're 25 still living with your mommy because your ex who's the mother of your son you haven't seen in years bailed on an apartment screwing you with an eviction and none of your friends want to be your roommate.
Can anyone say bye-bye? Haha.
I normally would be so upset discussing this, but looking back now, it's like a cosmic joke. I just hope if the patterns are true and real... I'll find another person to be with in a couple of years.
I hope so extremely, I don't think I could handle this life all alone...
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