Wanderers and relationships/sexuality

[Glow]

Thanks for the input guys! Interesting to hear your perspective on this.

It is interesting to hear how different our stories are and all wanderers are of course as unique as everybody else. Some of us might be meant to work more alone, at least for certain periods of time. We might have the need for different things in our lives, different catalyst, things that we are suppose to learn. For me, I feel like I am not "suppose" to have children for one, even though I love children so much. Maybe I will run in to a wanderer one day, who is as crazy as me, and share the same ideas and that will be it

I have also been in a giver never reciever relationship, the only long relationship I had, which was pretty painful for me in many ways, so that didn't really aid my appetite for relationships.
I do like the open minded ideas on relationships, to be able to love anyone you want in anyway you want and not put any restrictions on each other, it feels like many people are trying to own each other and that there is a power struggle in many relationships.

Just thinking out loud for what it's worth

I too didn’t and don’t feel like I was supposed to have children. I love all children like a momma bear but I love grown ups that way too. You are not alone in that.

I also don’t get monogamy. I do it but it makes no sense to me. I’m more a poly fidelity kind of person only because I like building deep bonds and I personally like to dedicate a lot of myself to those I choose. I don’t feel I could do that with more than 2, or 3 dedicated mates and I’d like that same quality of dedication.

Ownership doesn’t make sense to me with someone you love but spreading yourself among to many also would diminish the time and care energy devotion you can share with one another. The intensity and connectedness are important to me. Ideal for me would likely be 2 but everyone is different. I honestly think that’s why infidelity is so rampant. One person cannot supply our need for intimacy on all levels but those rules impose impossibility on anyone who wants to commit to anyone.

I know others don’t require the same level of dedication in their poly relationships so it seems like yet another mine field to find compatibile mates. My husband is open to the consept but just thinks humans are to selfish at this point to do it well. So we stay mono.

I think a quad would be amazing or even a less structured set up where everyone loves who they love but aren’t spreading themselves so thin anyone feels uncared for or taken advantage.

I always say I’m not coming back again till it’s like that. To me if you love someone why would you want to insist you are the only person who they are loved by... if anything I would love anyone who also loved my mate.

I just don’t get it. I do tend to be nieve and trust people not ready to be trusted so maybe next life or maybe that is home I am remembering.

Anyways just thought I’d reply.