08-19-2017, 07:59 AM
(08-17-2017, 11:52 AM)Fuse Wrote: I'm all for going all out in an effort to clear yourself, but make sure not to overcomplicate yourself into a place where you don't do it at all. If this is a warning you don't need, then it's just my daily reminder about this to myself, lol. But I have been making a lot more progress since I started following that advice.
If there's anything to the negative influences angle on your problem, it would be expected that the entity or entities would do everything they could to dissuade you from dealing with it. If it's true, you can't trust the instinct to hesitate. You also can't trust that voice that keeps whispering that you're crazy. I checked out enough of your videos and blog posts to know that you're not. Quite the contrary, you're sane in an utterly crazy world. It is what it is, lol.
I'm glad to hear that you've gotten through the bumpy ride to the calmness part! Hopefully everyone else is getting there as well. I've felt better the last week or more, but the past few days, it does really feel like the darkness has entirely run out of places to hide, and has spilled out onto the surface like the infection it is. Now we can finally start to cleanse the resulting mess and heal the wounds. It's as if the planet is breathing a sigh of relief at the absence of some of its pain.
I can feel this massive, breathless anticipation, like we're stepping through the door into the climactic scene of the movie all the angels are watching.
This week has been kinda crazy. Sick and weird pain but calm, and then these "negative-reminders" that dwell and trigger and poke
I feel something going on with everyone, globally.
I agree that the entities are probably doing everything to dissuade me from dealing with it, but honestly I don't know enough about them to do anything other than whatever I've done and I don't feel "cleared", or maybe because I don't feel like I have enough information to be able to clear... which is why I'm researching more.
I do a lot of pendulum-clearing work but I still lack the belief in a lot of this because I've spent the past 3 years trying to make everything mainstream even though all this stuff has been coming out occasionally, I've been doing mostly "mainstream" work like working on childhood traumas and self-esteem stuff, and ego-work and actually just keeping myself really small. I do epsom salt baths, burn sage and meditations and have bought different programmes, and EFT and I don't know, actually I think I've done about 30 or 40 different things that I've listed on my blog, but yeah, I don't think I've "nailed-it" or know enough. Next step is working on contracts/agreements that we may of unknowingly taken on in this incarnation that is not part of our path, and seeing if that works, even on a placebo-level.
But I think what's going to work for me, is coming back to my truth, which is that.. this is true somehow. The Law of One and the ideas of that nature. But I'm still "not there" because it still feels "dangerous" to me because of the crash.
But maybe I need to get the heck away from that work-place and all the people who I keep myself so small around because I'm so humiliated by what "they" see, I'm finding it difficult to re-empower myself because they don't see life the way that I do, and .. I don't want to stick my neck out of place.. like I don't want to "fly high" again and these people remind me of that because when I go in there, I feel dread and a really heavy density and I'm not like that when I'm not there, but it's because of everything that transpired - my catalyst's 'success' in turning others against me (becoming besties with the managers, etc.), and me not sticking up for myself because of my beliefs in sacrificing myself for him & because I didn't want anyone at work knowing what had transpired when we both have to continue working there.
I used to believe that you could "be the lantern" anywhere, but I only succeeded to be the lantern there for a little while and then this happened and now I don't know how to shift my energy/vibration when I'm at work. I always had faith that I would be able to do it, but now I'm recognizing that it's probably not meant to be. I can't help those people when I keep myself so small there, and I've spent too long using that place as "shadow-work".