03-27-2017, 12:33 PM
Meh, I took no pill, I'm like that one guy in the AniMatrix who ran himself right up to the point of disconnecting, pushed himself beyond the fold of the veil.
I want my autism label to be transmuted in my mind from one of constriction to one of freedom, I think it's going to take some time since I still only recently had confirmation of being autistic.
Ra says mental illnesses are symptoms of an inability to face the self. How am I supposed to translate my Autism with this in mind? What portion of my self am I unable to view and synthesize with? Is it the dark monstrous sides of my shadow self? Is it my full potential to be all things? Is it some small little bias of mine?
What is so hard to view that it has warped me with extra distortion of the mind? I see myself as a beautiful portion of the Creator, I see myself as embodying portions of the darkness, I see the devil inside of my self, I get there is darkness in me as a being of infinity, as a Wanderer I get I've done some dope deep and possibly incredibly dark and disturbing things.
Yet I can face my mother each day and tell her I love her when she heads off to work. I can befriend an ex who I hated in jealousy. I can even forgive the mother of my child for taking him away from me. I'm a pretty damn loving and kind person, so what am I so afraid of???
I think I'm a unique tier of weird, I'm not 'weirder' or less weird than others, I'm just a special kind of unique that is unique to even unique groups, one of those really odd people with a very pronounced personality that makes you sort of step back and go 'hrmm, that person sure is eccentric, he's weeirrd, hrmmmmm...'
I get the idea that we can heal anything, but the facts do not support the...Probability of this happening. It's a very specific, unique, and deep spiritual progression to begin a deep metaphysical healing of the physical vehicle akin to the healing at the energetic level. In order to heal a mental illness, you'd need to deprogram the causes in the energetic body and that isn't exactly something you do by just thinking it, you need to manifest it, and manifesting something is much much more complicated than 'thinking it into existence'.
So much more goes into the process of self-creation. The self-perpetuation of specific external patterns to become aware of their internal presence is no simple matter. Mere meditation doesn't do it, creating reality is a magic of sorts, Work in Consciousness, and I have to say, I am not a magical adept personality, I have no desire to enter the insane realms of magic, I just want to occasionally shift my reality to be more positive. It shouldn't be so hard to spread positivity heh.
I don't understand why you think I've ignored your advice, I may have an opinion of it but I'm still taking it seriously. I will try to not limit myself with the label of autism.
I think you forget that Contemplation is a form of Truth Seeking, and while I agree expansive free mounts of time to think can lead to some...Out there behavior and thoughts, I think it's funny you say I've completely cut myself off from my spiritual guidance system, I do beg to differ as I wouldn't be here receiving your and everyone's guidance if I wasn't connected to my spiritual guidance systems. I do think I've actually been the most closely consciously operating with awareness of my spiritual guides lately than I have since 2014, 3 years ago.
Why do you feel I'm cut off?? I've some opinions of the discarnate entities methods of interaction with the tangible, especially in regards to the Higher Self who I think is a very im/personal type of entity, encompassing aspects of myself and many others both like and completely unlike myself. The Higher Self is no simple discussion topic o:
I want my autism label to be transmuted in my mind from one of constriction to one of freedom, I think it's going to take some time since I still only recently had confirmation of being autistic.
Ra says mental illnesses are symptoms of an inability to face the self. How am I supposed to translate my Autism with this in mind? What portion of my self am I unable to view and synthesize with? Is it the dark monstrous sides of my shadow self? Is it my full potential to be all things? Is it some small little bias of mine?
What is so hard to view that it has warped me with extra distortion of the mind? I see myself as a beautiful portion of the Creator, I see myself as embodying portions of the darkness, I see the devil inside of my self, I get there is darkness in me as a being of infinity, as a Wanderer I get I've done some dope deep and possibly incredibly dark and disturbing things.
Yet I can face my mother each day and tell her I love her when she heads off to work. I can befriend an ex who I hated in jealousy. I can even forgive the mother of my child for taking him away from me. I'm a pretty damn loving and kind person, so what am I so afraid of???
I think I'm a unique tier of weird, I'm not 'weirder' or less weird than others, I'm just a special kind of unique that is unique to even unique groups, one of those really odd people with a very pronounced personality that makes you sort of step back and go 'hrmm, that person sure is eccentric, he's weeirrd, hrmmmmm...'
I get the idea that we can heal anything, but the facts do not support the...Probability of this happening. It's a very specific, unique, and deep spiritual progression to begin a deep metaphysical healing of the physical vehicle akin to the healing at the energetic level. In order to heal a mental illness, you'd need to deprogram the causes in the energetic body and that isn't exactly something you do by just thinking it, you need to manifest it, and manifesting something is much much more complicated than 'thinking it into existence'.
So much more goes into the process of self-creation. The self-perpetuation of specific external patterns to become aware of their internal presence is no simple matter. Mere meditation doesn't do it, creating reality is a magic of sorts, Work in Consciousness, and I have to say, I am not a magical adept personality, I have no desire to enter the insane realms of magic, I just want to occasionally shift my reality to be more positive. It shouldn't be so hard to spread positivity heh.
I don't understand why you think I've ignored your advice, I may have an opinion of it but I'm still taking it seriously. I will try to not limit myself with the label of autism.
I think you forget that Contemplation is a form of Truth Seeking, and while I agree expansive free mounts of time to think can lead to some...Out there behavior and thoughts, I think it's funny you say I've completely cut myself off from my spiritual guidance system, I do beg to differ as I wouldn't be here receiving your and everyone's guidance if I wasn't connected to my spiritual guidance systems. I do think I've actually been the most closely consciously operating with awareness of my spiritual guides lately than I have since 2014, 3 years ago.
Why do you feel I'm cut off?? I've some opinions of the discarnate entities methods of interaction with the tangible, especially in regards to the Higher Self who I think is a very im/personal type of entity, encompassing aspects of myself and many others both like and completely unlike myself. The Higher Self is no simple discussion topic o: