Fallen wanderer?!?!

[Infinite Unity]

This is bad, I was born with massive compassion, wisdom and all kinds of unusual positive traits. Somehow I went into denial early on. And all the bad choices that come with being in that state. After a massive heart awaking, everything fell into place but I realised I had built up negative karma, and a year later I fell hard, its like I lost my positivity. If this assessment is correct, then it means I'm f***ed. Somehow got tangled with STS vibrations. It started when I was a little kid, I remember the negative presence and sense of terror. A soulmate attempted to save me, but I messed it up which has really bad net karmic results, to the point I can barely breathe with self rejection. Before I read any of this Ra material, I had a vision of me slipping below some 50/50 threshold, and the signs said this is bad, it involves something about a long path.

Take a deep breath. I never believe it is to late, or to early. To change ones mind, change ones energy, and to grow. I know exactly how you feel. I was born positive, I remember from a small stature loving all animals, and caring for all life. When I was around eleven my mother left my father. Got with a new man, and it was the worst years of my life. I hated everything. I became very negative. I have experienced the spiritual heat that Ra discusses, and exacerbated my being with negativity. I lived like this until I was twenty two years old. I remember pain almost like heart attacks, which brought me to my knees. I always thought I had a heart problem. I was only closing my heart. Turning that energy back toward the lower triad. When I was twenty two I began reading Ra, and what I knew my whole life came back to me, and that was love. It was not over night, nor am I completely healed today. It took many years for me to start generation positive energy, and for the negative to fall away. Forgive yourself, look into those moments, see how you felt. Forgive yourself. It may take awhile. There are no errors even what we see as error is in perfect synch.