To think or not to think

[Plenum]

How do you get to the roots and discover exactly what emotional pattern keeps repeating itself and why?  Is it simply a matter of continuously asking yourself why do I feel this, why do I feel that, until there is some sort of breakthrough?

there's usually a heavy amount of symbolism to it.  So learning to work with one's dreams is a great tool for working with one's waking consciousness.

one of the best ways to penetrate fear is to keep drilling down into negative scenarios.

Let's say it's a social fear, of going up to someone you don't know that well, and asking some question, favor, or to hang out.

The fear of rejection is a big one here, for most sensitive folks, male or female.

So ask the question: what is the worse that could happen in this situation?

First answer: other person laughs at me.

Ask the question again: what is the worse that can happen if the person laughs at me?

Second answer: I feel humiliated and stupid

Ask the question again: what is the worse that could happen if I feel humiliated and stupid?

Third Answer: My parents will be angry because they expect me to do well in school (classic asian answer).

Ask the question again:

Fourth Answer: I won't have my parents support

Ask the question again: what is the worse that could happen if I don't have my parent's support?

Fifth Answer: I will go hungry, because that is how they punished me once before

And that may be the deepest level of fear.  That one will literally have no sustenance for the physical body (food) because of a particular line of action that started at the surface level.

That emotional trauma (lack of love) is the thing that needs to be dealt with at core.

One can be truly surprised at where this simple line of Questioning can go.  So long as you try to answer as honestly as you can (it's a process that happens within the self).  And one can get to places where one starts shaking and crying, and you still know there are deeper levels to go down before you hit 'rock bottom'.

So that's why patience and care is needed.  Sometimes you will get to places where you aren't able to go deeper in the current state.  You just aren't ready to see more clearly yet.

so that's just one technique.  It's take a brutal amount of self-honesty for it to yield results.  You can see some things that make you realise many of one's personality behaviours are just maladaptive behaviours.