Seeking conversation about shturf n thangs!

[Biu_Tze]

I would say enjoy the time with her while your with her and find a hobby or something you enjoy doing and put a little more energy into that.

Thanks for your response.
I actually met her doing my passion, and she's there every night I am, which is awesome.
I spend as much time doing it on the side as I can too, but it's hard to find people to train with a lot of the time..
I want to find some other way to be creative, but I'm struggling at the moment.

I feel like I need to do some research on self love.. I keep coming back to that..
I have infinite amount of love to put out, but it's weird to try to direct it inwards.. I just don't want to.. it doesn't feel right..
I can't really mean it when I say I love myself to myself. I feel stuck here, and I'm praying something finally clicks into place for me.
I am open to working hard at it, but it's so elusive a topic to me... and I'm sure the answer is hiding in plain sight too.. argh!
Anyone have suggestions on information regarding that?