06-20-2015, 06:44 PM
There seems to be this idea that the forum should be the perfect place for everyone. I, for one, think that if this forum is truly representing the ideals it strives to represent, there are plenty of people who will inevitably feel out of place here and decide the forum is not for them.
People who thrive on conflict, for example. People who prefer judgment and shaming over addressing disagreements with patience and compassion. People driven by a sense of self-superiority and entitlement. People whose fragile egos must be danced around like egg shells. To cater to these sorts of individuals is not fair to those who put actual effort into upholding a community centered around transparent honesty, humility, acceptance and love.
I’ve seen plenty of people come in here, act rudely toward others, generally make a nuisance of themselves and then throw a tantrum when they are finally called out on their behavior, screaming something about hypocrisy and lack of acceptance on their way out the door. And I always tip my hat to these people. To be a part of a community is a give and take. If you want to criticize, you’ve got to be willing to accept criticism, and if you want acceptance in spite of all your flaws, you’ve got to be willing to work very hard at accepting the flaws of others. This environment is the result of constant group effort, and those who treat it as nothing more than a tool can expect disappointment when it fails to convenience them.
So no, I don’t think this forum is for everyone. That doesn’t mean I look down on those who wouldn’t find this environment a suitable one. Regardless of a person’s preferences it is my goal to treat them with the respect I feel all human beings deserve. However, I’m not going to feel bad about myself if I am unable to accommodate a person insistent upon spreading negativity, and when that person inevitably gets fed up and leaves, I’m only going to wish them well.
There is a huge difference in maintaining an environment of acceptance and being a doormat for anyone out there who happens to want attention.
People who thrive on conflict, for example. People who prefer judgment and shaming over addressing disagreements with patience and compassion. People driven by a sense of self-superiority and entitlement. People whose fragile egos must be danced around like egg shells. To cater to these sorts of individuals is not fair to those who put actual effort into upholding a community centered around transparent honesty, humility, acceptance and love.
I’ve seen plenty of people come in here, act rudely toward others, generally make a nuisance of themselves and then throw a tantrum when they are finally called out on their behavior, screaming something about hypocrisy and lack of acceptance on their way out the door. And I always tip my hat to these people. To be a part of a community is a give and take. If you want to criticize, you’ve got to be willing to accept criticism, and if you want acceptance in spite of all your flaws, you’ve got to be willing to work very hard at accepting the flaws of others. This environment is the result of constant group effort, and those who treat it as nothing more than a tool can expect disappointment when it fails to convenience them.
So no, I don’t think this forum is for everyone. That doesn’t mean I look down on those who wouldn’t find this environment a suitable one. Regardless of a person’s preferences it is my goal to treat them with the respect I feel all human beings deserve. However, I’m not going to feel bad about myself if I am unable to accommodate a person insistent upon spreading negativity, and when that person inevitably gets fed up and leaves, I’m only going to wish them well.
There is a huge difference in maintaining an environment of acceptance and being a doormat for anyone out there who happens to want attention.
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