12-14-2014, 06:53 AM
I was having moderate panic attacks most of the day today. The latest one I had was fairly severe. This time, I just didn't have any fight left in me. I couldn't stem the waves of panic; I just couldn't stand feeling like that anymore. I started becoming very upset. I had an unbelievably powerful emotional breakdown; I just completely lost it emotionally. I wept like a toddler having a meltdown. I felt very good afterwards and I even wept with joy a little. I am now feeling the first symptoms of panic again, however.
So, I keep coming back to the question: which is the chicken and which is the egg? (Are the physical symptoms causing the attacks or vice versa?)
I'm not sure if you are capable of 'seeing' physical ailments, but the only panic attack triggers I have been able to identify are upper back pain and stomach/solar plexus discomfort combined with a feeling of disconnection with my body. I can't tell if those two ailments are something physically wrong triggering the attacks, or if my mind is causing the physical symptoms. I would love to rule out physical dis-ease if those symptoms are caused by my panic attacks. So if you are capable, I would appreciate you scanning my stomach for an ulcer and scanning my upper spinal column for some kind of issue (in between my shoulder blades). If you are not capable or are otherwise unable to do that, I appreciate the consideration regardless.
If the physical symptoms are being caused by the attacks, I am at a complete loss as to why I am having them. I have followed most of the suggestions made to me in this thread as both preventative measures and to cope when having an attack. The preventative measures are difficult to guage in how effective they really are. I can say all methods, whether suggested here, modern psychology coping mechanisms such as EMDR, or methods I have devised, are usually only 5-10% effective when having a full blown attack.
That is the primary reason it is so frightening to me and why it really got to me today. There is literally no escape. Meditation, sleep, laying down in a dark quiet place, listening to classical or favorite music, watching a favorite movie or TV show, playing a videogame I really enjoy, performing the microcosmic orbit, reciting mantras, clearing chakras, going for a walk, going for a drive, using a back massager, laying on my back on the floor, masturbation, drinking cold water, energy visualization, rationaling nothing is physically wrong wit me... I've tried literally everything I can think of and it very rarely helps. Many of the coping mechanisms listed will sometimes make the attack worse.
My attacks seem to be increasing in frequency. So I am here again reaching out for help/healing/insight. Thanks for reading.
So, I keep coming back to the question: which is the chicken and which is the egg? (Are the physical symptoms causing the attacks or vice versa?)
I'm not sure if you are capable of 'seeing' physical ailments, but the only panic attack triggers I have been able to identify are upper back pain and stomach/solar plexus discomfort combined with a feeling of disconnection with my body. I can't tell if those two ailments are something physically wrong triggering the attacks, or if my mind is causing the physical symptoms. I would love to rule out physical dis-ease if those symptoms are caused by my panic attacks. So if you are capable, I would appreciate you scanning my stomach for an ulcer and scanning my upper spinal column for some kind of issue (in between my shoulder blades). If you are not capable or are otherwise unable to do that, I appreciate the consideration regardless.
If the physical symptoms are being caused by the attacks, I am at a complete loss as to why I am having them. I have followed most of the suggestions made to me in this thread as both preventative measures and to cope when having an attack. The preventative measures are difficult to guage in how effective they really are. I can say all methods, whether suggested here, modern psychology coping mechanisms such as EMDR, or methods I have devised, are usually only 5-10% effective when having a full blown attack.
That is the primary reason it is so frightening to me and why it really got to me today. There is literally no escape. Meditation, sleep, laying down in a dark quiet place, listening to classical or favorite music, watching a favorite movie or TV show, playing a videogame I really enjoy, performing the microcosmic orbit, reciting mantras, clearing chakras, going for a walk, going for a drive, using a back massager, laying on my back on the floor, masturbation, drinking cold water, energy visualization, rationaling nothing is physically wrong wit me... I've tried literally everything I can think of and it very rarely helps. Many of the coping mechanisms listed will sometimes make the attack worse.
My attacks seem to be increasing in frequency. So I am here again reaching out for help/healing/insight. Thanks for reading.