help!! advice please!!!!

[MichaelD]

In my experience, trust is hard to regain once it's been lost. Your OP is very convoluted though. You say she has basically been lying to you the entire time about the sex thing. Then you go on to say how could you trust her, that she could cheat or whatever and lie about it and you would never know, but you say you don't think she would do that. Why wouldn't she lie more if she has before.

I think it is well to consider why you want this relationship and what you hope to achieve by being in it. My opinion is neither of you are clear in this matter. You say you are 'sososo' in love, when in actuality it seems you are simply infatuated with her. Love can be defined partially by a sense of a freedom. If I love someone then I want them to be totally free, free to be who they are, whatever that means. Does this sound like your relationship?

First of all, take a deep breath. And a few more. You are very young and relationships can easily make you feel like your life is ending/beginning. I've been there. While it may indeed could be an immensely powerful relationship, the truth is all will be well regardless of the relationships existence. You are both creators and both are equal parts of the one creator.