the energy has been so INTENSE lately

[Cyclops]

Here is an excerpt on why lessons and the path usually become harder as the awakened seeker moves along.
Q'uo Saturday Meditation May 9, 2009

Well is it called a spiritual path, for there is indeed a journey that begins when a seeker awakens from the dream of Earth to realize how very much deeper and wider and richer the Creation is than he was taught by his culture. It is as though an alarm has gone off and he starts from his slumbers. It’s a rude awakening sometimes and, once awakened, the seeker cannot go back to sleep. This is a great blessing. Yet there are times when it does not seem so.

You have asked if a seeker’s path becomes more difficult as the seeker becomes more spiritually mature. And you have likened the situation to the athlete who wishes to become stronger and therefore must add weight to his repetitions in order to see a continued strengthening of the muscles. My brother, we would respond by saying that it often seems as though the weights which you are lifting become heavier. Yet the analogy does not hold, at least not precisely. And to look at how this perceived increased difficulty works in a seeker’s life, we need to fill in some background.

Before this incarnation each of you planned what the shape and the direction of the incarnation would be. You and your guidance system gazed at your soul stream and its balances of power, love and wisdom and you devised an incarnation with themes or incarnational lessons, if you will, using the metaphor of the School of Earth being one which distills and refines souls.

You chose relationships that would challenge you and support you. And, looking at your incarnational themes, you devised situations which were rich in catalyst. Redundancy was built into this plan. You prepared yourself with far more relationships than you would need, just to be sure that, if you kept backing away from a situation that involved an incarnational lesson, you would never run out of replacement situations that would sound the same theme and bring forward the same opportunities to adjust the balances of love, power and wisdom within your energy body.

Consequently, when you awakened as a seeker, you began to be aware of the repetitive nature of these themes. You saw that the lesson that you had put before yourself in order to work on these balances that are so important to your soul stream would be given to you again and again.

Each entity has an unique incarnational plan. We can only generalize in talking about the shape and the texture of that lesson that seems to come up again and again in your life. At the beginning of the journey you are working at that first layer of insight or understanding. Gradually, as these lessons cycle through your life as a seeker, you begin to recognize the pattern.

Picture, if you will, your path not as straight ahead but as a spiral. You can picture it as a spiral going upwards and that will be accurate, because each time you work with an incarnational lesson you have walked further into the light. You have experience behind you now. You are far more able to be present with your catalyst and to approach it fearlessly.

Yet also you may picture this journey as a spiral downward or inward. It is as if you were peeling layers of a many-layered thing like an onion, where all of your suffering and all of your triumph moves you one layer closer to the center of your incarnational lesson. The center remains a mystery, yet as you move through these cycles of learning, there is an equal amount of increased insight and increased challenge.

The increase in the challenge is due to the fact that you are moving ever closer to the center of your incarnational lesson. You have earned the right to deal more directly this time with that which will aid the soul stream, of which you within incarnation are a shell of personality, in comparison to the soul stream. You are as one literally on a journey having packed your suitcases with your skills, your gifts, your relationships, and your challenges. You could not bring everything into this incarnation. You brought those parts of your soul stream which you needed in order to move through this dance, if you will, and do the work you came to do.

So you see, it is not that the weights get heavier; it is not that you lift more; it is not linear. The increase in the feeling of challenge is that increase that occurs because you are moving closer to your goal. Thus, the colors are clearer; the energies are more intense and truer. You have earned authenticity and in your authenticity you grapple far more intimately with this question of balance.

It is a great help to you as a seeker to come to terms with and appreciate the nature of the incarnational lesson or lessons with which you have supplied yourself. This familiarity with the theme of your incarnation, however, does not keep that work from being intense.

In third density it is not obvious to the naked eye that all things are one. It is not at all clear that your gawky, ungainly physical bodies are engaged in a beautiful, graceful dance with all that there is. And when the Lord of the Dance [1] calls you it is easy to spend countless hours thinking, “I cannot dance, I cannot hear the music … I, I, I.”

How fortunate it is that for every seeker there are moments of clarity when the dance is clearly perceived in all of its beauty and grace and when you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are a dancer and that you are graceful, beautiful and perfect. And then the veil drops and things seem effortful and harsh. And truly, for each of you, the lessons that you have chosen are not easy.

This, we believe, is the happenstance that is the most accurate description of the seeming fact that, as one becomes more experienced and has more history of seeking and asking, one’s lessons do not become easier but indeed often seem harder. The increasing depth of difficulty is due to the increased amount of truth and authenticity that are wrapped into the experience of that incarnational lesson at this point in your cycles, which indeed shall continue while you breathe the air of Planet Earth.

And we say this not as a threat, but only as information that may be useful to you. You are not building a stairway to heaven. [2] You are spiraling into the light of truth. As you go, you are learning to love yourself and others and the Creator. You are learning to accept love from yourself, from others, and from the Creator. You are learning to be. And this is the glory of being within the veil of forgetting upon Planet Earth. For when you can move through the mire of that veil and into the light, through faith alone, you have used the harsh circumstances of third density to their very fullest.

On the concepts of time and why there is never a rush.
Q’uo September 15, 1996)

When entities attempt to think of time as a value, inevitably they become completely frustrated. The reason for this is that time is illusory. It is tied into space as space is tied into time to create the illusion that something is happening, that there is a past and a future. In actuality it is our understanding that we are all without space and time, without separation. All is occurring within this one instant that ever has or ever will occur. It is one whole. It is love. Through the illusion of time love is articulated and mirrored back to its source. And this is deeply, deeply satisfying to the Infinite Creator. So when you think of how you spend your time, release yourself from the judgments of those who have strictures of what constitutes service and love. For by the way your being meets the world that it perceives through its senses, each of you is giving the greatest gift of all to the Creator, to each other

Each entity you will ever meet or have trouble with is the creator always experiencing itself through free-will as it interacts with you, therefore the perceived dislike of any part of the one should prompt one to see the illusion of separation.
Q'uo Channeling Circle 5 February 6, 2010

If your desire, that of being an instrument for the Creator, is a desire which you hold with all your heart, then this desire becomes your service, becomes your path. Your ability to serve as an instrument for the Creator has no boundaries and is fueled by this pure desire that burns within your heart. Each entity, indeed each thing within the creation, serves the Creator in a way which may be more or less conscious, more or less efficient, shall we say. However, the service is true. The service is there.

The service moves through the interaction of all parts, persons and particles of creation. This is the Creator knowing Itself. This is the reason for the creation, that the Creator may know Itself through each of its portions, each part of the creation. Thus, as you move through your daily round of activities, you interact with other portions of the Creator to inform the Creator, according to your free will, of the various experiences which are open to you as you choose this and that, this and that

I know that everything is getting tougher for I can feel it as well. It's never wrong to ask the infinite one for help, for you and the infinite one are the same being. It was even stated that no matter how small a particle or an entity, paradoxically the infinite one creator in all of it's infinite mystery is within with nothing missing at all.
Q'uo Channeling Circle 5 February 6, 2010

Seeking to offer oneself to the Creator, it is all right to ask the Creator for help, to ask for the inspiration and wisdom to make the adjustments to function upon the path you have chosen. You are never alone in your seeking, for the entire universe breathes as you breathe. To enter into prayer or meditation, to seek assistance in order to connect with the Creator is nothing of which to be ashamed.

In your very seeking of the Creator you are offering yourself. Simply realizing that every action in which you partake is a gift to the knowledge of the Creator. This in itself is a service.

In this density you are so much trapped in a linear model of time. And yet to understand that the very moment which you breathe in contains all of creation allows you to realize that all is as it will be at this moment or that in this moment there is eternity. When you look up, and reach for that light and pray wholeheartedly to be of service, take the time to find that light within yourself that resonates with the very light on high for which you strive. The spark of the Creator will grow brighter and brighter within your own soul as you discover more of it.

The Creator sees you always, is with you always, and will never turn a blind eye to your heart’s desires. We have personally spoken to this instrument on numerous occasions in telling her that it is OK to ask for help. So you need not fear that in your imperfection you might not make the grade, that your reaching might not be enough to put you on the level you perceive that you need to be in order to serve the Creator. For by asking this question, you have in turn answered this very question. Seeking the Creator and being the Creator: this is the epitome of service.

The first distortion of the one was free will, no matter how ridiculous it seems how anybody is acting at any time it will always be the creator underneath gladly doing that for it seeks to know itself in it's infinite mystery. Seen in utter perfection everything no matter what it is will be the complete creator, therefore nothing is more scared then the rest and nothing is more loved then the rest.