10-22-2013, 08:42 PM
Brittney, I'm just going to vent in your thread, hope you don't mind.
I've been worn out for the past year. Before that, I had been repressing just about all my major lessons. I'm not depressed. I'm not angry. I'm just SOOOOOO tired. Once or twice a week, I go through a cycle where I sink down and release, feel great, and then (what feels like way too soon, usually a couple hours, the next day if I'm lucky) move on to the next lesson.
And the crazy thing is, I'm honestly overall doing better each time I go through this cycle. It doesn't change the fact that I feel like I'm constantly trying as hard as I can to choose love, and I'm completely exhausted.
And at the bottom of it all, I know that I'm the one that is pushing myself this hard. That I could just relax and let things flow to me, but instead I'm constantly looking for the opportunity where I change my life in an instant.
I've been worn out for the past year. Before that, I had been repressing just about all my major lessons. I'm not depressed. I'm not angry. I'm just SOOOOOO tired. Once or twice a week, I go through a cycle where I sink down and release, feel great, and then (what feels like way too soon, usually a couple hours, the next day if I'm lucky) move on to the next lesson.
And the crazy thing is, I'm honestly overall doing better each time I go through this cycle. It doesn't change the fact that I feel like I'm constantly trying as hard as I can to choose love, and I'm completely exhausted.
And at the bottom of it all, I know that I'm the one that is pushing myself this hard. That I could just relax and let things flow to me, but instead I'm constantly looking for the opportunity where I change my life in an instant.