Shadow and Responsibility in Video Games

[Lycen]

I go by feeling, if I feel it is wrong then I play the way I feel is right. I am usually conscious of my choices, as if I where making em in my life. Emotional attachment makes it hard for me to play anything other than what I perceive as "good". This kinda makes many games for me "boring" as well, because of this choice of being "good". I would have liked to play as something els sometimes as games usually provide a few 'paths'. Yet being other than myself gives no satisfaction, more like a steady rise of anxiety depending on how much I ignore my feelings.

I think if I played without emotion, I could be other than myself, but I see no point in that. As emotional engagement is what I look for in games at this time. The expression of who I am.

I believe that my choices affect my polarity always (each time/moment), by how much 'knowledge' and emotion I have behind em. Thus it matters not if it's a game or something other for me at this time, any choice will either lighten or burden me it seems.

I would note, that I believe I have studied/lived semi consciously with my darker side longer than my light. Perhaps I am content with what I know for now as well. Even so I think the thoughts offered still apply to any who choose this way.